Search and Rescue
by kitkat681
Summary: Bella is in an elite search and rescue team, trying to forget the one person she could not save.  Edward is trying to forget his past by taking photographs in the middle of a war zone.  Can they forgive themselves before everything comes crashing down?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Welcome to the wonderful world of 'Search and Rescue.' I'll let you enjoy this first little taste and I'll bore you down below.**

*** Melanie and Dally helped with this…as always.**

The phone was a very unwelcome wake-up call. Bella had only been asleep for a few hours when the ringing jolted her awake. Blindly reaching for her nightstand, her fingers fumbled to accept the call.

"Swan." She grunted, making sure that whoever had rudely awakened her, knew she was pissed.

"I need you both at the tarmac in an hour." Her best friend Rose replied, her voice tight. Even though she had not heard from her friend in over a month in this capacity, Bella was instantly up and alert.

"Where?" She answered as she jumped from the bed and pulled her always-ready pack from the closet.

"Washington." Rose whispered and Bella dropped the jeans she had in her hands, her fingers suddenly numb.

"Where?" She whimpered, knowing from Rose's tone that she already had her answer.

"Yes Bella, home."

**A/N: So…what to expect with this one. Angst, action, drama, romance…more angst…lemons eventually…and more action. This will be AH/OOC/Bella and Edward pairing. I will be posting once a week…on Saturdays. I MAY give you the next chapter later today is you ask nicely. Cause I know you really want to get to know Bella. There will also be a big chance for you to direct where the story goes, not for Bella and Edward but for another pairing in the story. I'll let you know when that happens. **

**So you want the next chapter?**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Holy response! Ok, ok…here is a nice big (well big for me) chapter for you. No Edward yet but at least we get to see more about Bella.**

**Melanie has nicknamed this Edward 'Lensward', so we are going with that for him. He talks to her, and I think Sugarward is jealous.**

**Dalloway5906 is sick of my cliffys. Tough shit I tell her. It could be worse, she got chapters 11 and 12 of this in her inbox yesterday…you all have to wait.**

**More below. **

**Five Months Earlier **

Ring ring. Ring ring.

"Swan." Bella growled as she answered her phone.

"Getcha ass up and get to the airport. The crew leaves in 90 minutes." Rose said as soon as Bella picked up the phone. She glanced at the clock on her nightstand and struggled to read the bleary numbers.

"Rose, it's like two in the morning. What's up?" She mumbled as she rolled over in the bed.

"Mother nature does not wait girly. We got a mud slide in Rio de Janeiro and I got you all on a transport leaving in…now 85 minutes. Get. Cha. Ass. Up." Rose said, before slamming the phone down, leaving Bella groggy and a bit pissed off.

"Jake, get up." Bella called from the closet as she threw on a t-shirt and a hooded sweatshirt, knowing that the weather would be brutal when they landed. Since it was March, the weather was always unpredictable, case in point- the reason they were headed there. Hearing no response from the bedroom, Bella stomped back to the bed and ripped the covers off.

"Jake, I mean it. Get your lazy ass up and get ready to go." She yelled, getting a grumpy moan in response. She picked up the bottle of water she kept by her bed and tossed the contents on her sleepy bedmate. He jumped up, shaking the water off of himself as he got off the bed. Bella pointed her finger towards the door and the love of her life thundered out of the room and down the stairs, heading for the back yard.

Bella had found Jake two years earlier when she graduated from the Police Academy. She had started out at the University of Missouri, but after only a year knew that college was not for her. She needed to _do_ something, needed to be making a difference. She knew that if she had been able to make a difference three years earlier, her entire life might have been different.

Bella aced into the academy and a year later, she was finished. She had been walking home after having dinner with her friends to celebrate her graduation when she heard his pitiful whining. She ventured down an alley to investigate the sound when she saw him.

He was all feet and ears, his fur matted and dirty. She could not help but to snatch him up after he looked up at her with his big brown eyes. She found an emergency vet that was open late and after he was cleaned up and declared in good health, she took him home. The vet told her he was a black lab/bloodhound mix- or a blab as she called him. They thought he would top off around 80 pounds when full grown. His ears were longer than a labs, but not the floor-dragging length of a bloodhound. He was solid black except for a small patch of white on his chest. He was only a pup and should have still been with his mother. He took to Bella instantly and she became the mother he still desperately needed. She hand-fed him until he was big enough to eat on his own, and once he did…he never stopped. What was once a scrawny, dirty pup was now a healthy 140 pound monster.

With his bloodhound heritage, Jake was a natural when it came to search and rescue. Bella had started out with the Kansas City police force, but after helping out the American Red Cross with a tornado in northern Arkansas, she realized that she and Jake could help more people if they worked search and rescue instead.

She had started out working for FEMA, but soon found that red tape halted most of their work and decided to go into the private sector. She was not paid much, but she made enough to survive and she realized that being able to be first on the scene was more important than making a lot of money. She opened a small training facility to work with new dogs and their handlers to supplement her income. It was flexible enough that she could still leave at a moments notice when a disaster struck.

It was when she joined the team that she met her best friend, Rose. They had gone to the same high school in Washington, but did not run in the same crowd back then. Rose had been on vacation in Thailand in 2004 when the Tsunami hit and she lost her husband, Emmett, when the wave came ashore. She spent days searching through the ruins for him, but he was never found. When she came home weeks later, she left her job as an attorney and joined the search and rescue team, learning the ropes as she went along. Emmett's life insurance meant that she did not have to worry about money, so she spent all of her time preparing the team for the next disaster.

The team was stationed in Kansas City, but traveled wherever they were needed. Rose always managed to find them a military transport that was heading their way and they hitched a ride. Military helicopters could travel much father than civilian ones, so they were able to get there faster. Bella remembered Rose's voice from the phone call earlier and hurried through her prep.

She put six changes of clothes into her duffle as well as Jake's vest and his collapsible water and food bowl. She ran downstairs and brought her boy in from doing his business. He nosed his bowl over to her and she filled it with a just a bit of food, knowing that it would just come back up if the flight got bumpy. When he was finished, he sat down in the hallway by the garage door and waited for Bella to finish getting her gear ready. With one last check through her bag, they were out the door, packed into her Jeep Wrangler and on their way.

**()*()**

"We'll be touching down in five minutes ladies and gents. Please be advised that the local time is 10:45pm. There are Humvees on the ground to take you to the hardest hit locations." The Marine pilot told them over the headsets. Bella sat with Jake at her feet. He had been riding in choppers since he was a pup and never had any problems. Rose on the other hand, was sick as a dog. The flight took nearly 11 hours and you would think she would get used to the motion after a while, but the sway of the bird always made her hurl.

The team was anxious as they got closer to the set-down location. In addition to Bella and Jake, there was Emily and her chocolate lab, Sam, Embry and his golden retriever, Claire and Riley and his bloodhound, Victoria. The team worked well together, more like a family than anything else. Of course, when you have seen each other at their worst, it is hard not to form a strong bond. Over the years they have done more recovery work than rescue, and pulling dead bodies from disaster areas takes a toll on both the people and dogs. Bella hated going into a recovery situation, but knew that being able to bury the body of a loved one was important. She saw how Rose was still affected by not finding Emmett's body years later.

Even after spending nearly 11 hours in the air, once on the ground Rose was rock solid and alert taking command and directing them to two different Humvees. Bella and Emily were heading towards the areas that were the hardest hit. The Brazilian location had almost 12 inches of rain drop on them in one day and the destruction was epic. The first report had almost 300 missing with 50 reported dead. The chances of finding any survivors only got worse as time wore on.

**()*()**

"Here boy, come and get some water." Bella encouraged Jake to drink from his collapsible bowl and not any of the freestanding puddles that littered the landscape. There were all kinds of bacteria lurking in those fresh-looking pools, and the last thing she needed was a sick pup. They had been working through the night, using headlamps and portable, generator powered lights to try and find survivors. Jake plopped down next to her as she sat on a rock and she took off his vest so he knew he was 'off-duty' and rubbed her fingers through his mud-slicked fur.

"I know boy." Bella cooed as he whined and put his muzzle on her knee. They had been working for hours but had yet to find a survivor. It killed Jake to find body after body and she knew he was not going to be of much use soon if they did not find a live one. She gave him one last pat on his flank before putting his vest back on and watched him transform into a working dog once again. She stood, stretching her arms up over her head and bending forward to ease her sore hamstrings. No matter how much training she did between disasters, she was always surprised at how physically taxing it was to climb over debris and through thick mud or hip-high water.

Jake pulled her towards what was once a tall apartment building, but was now full of mud to at least the fourth floor. The sun was peeking over the horizon, painting the sky in the pinks and reds that always seemed to precede a catastrophic weather even like what happened yesterday. Bella jumped over what looked like a mailbox and followed Jake as he climbed up the slick mountain of mud. The closer he got to one of the open windows, the more he whined, his muscles vibrating under his thick black fur.

"What you got boy?" Bella asked quietly, urging him on as she radioed their location into Rose. Jake put his paws up on the window ledge and looked into the dark building. The power had been off since the storm hit yesterday and had yet to be restored. Bella leaned into the open window and shone her flashlight in. All was still and she held her breath, praying that there was someone alive to find. Jake let out one sharp bark before trying to pull her in.

"Jake wait." She said quietly, but as soon as the words were out of her mouth, she heard a cry in heavily accented English from inside the building.

"Please…help us."

**A/N: So now you know what Bella does for a living. Did I get anyone with Jake in the bed? I totally got Dally with that one. Of course Jake is a dog…come on that totally works!**

**So… some important info: I am trying very hard to stay factual with disasters. I may fudge some info and there will be a time when I am just making shit up as I go. But if you read about a mud slide, tornado or flood in here, there is a good chance that it really happened.**

**We will get to the prologue soon enough and we will meet Edward next chapter.**

**I am hoping to stick to a Saturday posting schedule but could be convinced to give you an extra chapter on Wednesday just this once so you can meet Lensward.**

**So…convince me!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Hello everyone! I am so excited you guys are excited! I LOVE these two, they are like my babies right now and to have you enjoying them…is wonderful! **

**Melanie is cheating on Sugarward (and Vikingward and Professorward) with Lensward, and I don't see any remorse. She is heading to a party this weekend and I hope she has fun and comes back without any broken bones.**

**Dalloway5906 posted a new story called 'Reboot' and let me just tell you…an insecure Edward paired with a Bella at the end of her rope…sign me up! Go check it out and leave her some love.**

**Kitties1 and Arc Morpheus, my fellow harpies in the Tent, rocked my world when they started reading this. I'm honored to have them along for the ride and hope that my words live up to their expectations. Are you reading kitties1's ISABELLA SWAN: SUBMISSIVE? No? Well, just make sure you have some extra panties handy if you do.**

"You did good Bella." Rose said as she wrapped her arm around her friend's shoulder. The medics and rescue personnel had just pulled five people from the ruined apartment building, two of which were children. Jake was bouncing happily next to the kids as the medics looked them over before they would be taken to a makeshift shelter. Bella held his vest in her limp fingers and rested her head on Rose's shoulder. She hated this…the aftermath. Jake could bounce back so quickly once he found someone alive, as if just seeing a living person could erase all of the death that had come before it. But for Bella, those lifeless bodies stayed with her.

"They've called off the search so the team is heading back to the hotel until we can get a transport in the morning." Rose said. "You know…tomorrow is Easter, how about you hitch a ride home with me."

Bella sighed and shook her head. Rose was forever trying to get Bella to come to her parent's house in Seattle. While they had gone to high school together, they were never really friends then. Rose ran with the popular kids while Bella was a studious bookworm who spent her days in the library or avoiding tripping over people as she read her books while walking down the hallways. Bella's mom still lived in the same small town Rose and Bella had grown up in, 3 hours outside of Seattle. Bella had not been home since...since the accident.

"Rose…" Bella started but her friend would not take no for an answer.

"No Bella, it has been too long since you were home. You have been alone for every holiday for the last four years. Enough is enough. You are coming home with me and that is all there is to it!" Bella had never seen her friend so adamant and could only nod her head.

"Good, after we drop the team off in Kansas City we'll just have them take us to Seattle." Rose said, as if ordering a military helicopter around was an everyday event for her.

"How in the name of God are you going to get them to go 1,500 miles out of their way?" Bella questioned with a laugh and regretted it instantly. Rose's face morphed into something wrong, something dead and she let out a pained chuckle.

"You would be surprised." She answered, her voice monotone as she released her friend and walked over to the humvee. Bella cursed herself for asking a question like that. She knew that Rose often used her body to get things done, as if she were punishing herself for Emmett's loss. One of the main reasons Bella never allowed herself to get close to anyone was the look on Rose's face right then. She knew if she truly gave her heart to someone…it had the potential to destroy her.

**()*()**

Bella dropped her pack to the ground the second she was in her hotel room. They had managed to get separate rooms for each member of the team, which was rare. They were usually bunked two or three to a room. Jake followed behind Bella, because he knew what was coming. This happened after every rescue and he had come to expect it. Bella shed her clothes on the way to the bathroom and sighed in relief when she saw the bathtub. So many hotels only had shower stalls and she hated them. She needed a tub.

Bella sat down in the tub and turned the water as hot as it would go. She kept the lights off as the water filled the basin and Jake came over to sit at the edge of the porcelain, his muzzle on the lip of the tub. She set her hand on the top of his majestic head and sunk down into the water, her skin stinging as the hot water lapped against her. She reached up with her free hand and tugged the band from her hair, her mud covered waves falling against her back and into the water. Soon, the dirt had made it so she could not even see herself through the water it was so dirty. Jake whined and settled down on his belly as Bella started to cry. Great heaving sobs tore through her as she mourned the loss of those they had found. After thirty minutes, the water was cold and Bella was empty, the tears had purged the pain from her chest and she could breathe again, at least until the next disaster.

**()*()**

"Bella, it is so nice to see you again." Carlisle said as he opened the door for her and Jake and ushered them in. Bella was stiff as he pulled her into his arms, never having really been one for any physical affection. Her mother was standoffish and she could remember being hugged only a few times growing up. And after the accident…

But the Cullen's were huggers.

Esme came running in from the hall, her hair wild around her head and her hands covered in flour. She pulled Bella against her, leaving white handprints on her back as she patted her.

"I am so happy you're here." She squealed, making Jake bark in amusement. She looked down at him, his heavy tail bouncing against the wall as it wagged. "Both of you." She smiled as she rubbed her hands on Jake's head, leaving him looking gray from the flour. She pulled back and laughed apologetically. Bella smiled at Esme as she used the sleeve of her hoody to wipe Jake's head off. Carlisle took Bella upstairs and showed her the guest room she would be using, one of only two suites on the third floor. It had its own private balcony with stairs that led to the backyard so Jake would have an easy time taking care of business.

After setting her bags in her room, she took Jake outside so he could get acquainted with all the new smells. The sun was low in the sky as the pair walked around the yard, stopping here and there so Jake could mark his territory. When Bella came upon a beautiful stone pillar nestled in the thick trees at the edge of the yard, she stopped, her breath stalling in her chest. It was a monument to Emmett, Rose's husband. The stone was rough hewn; all sharp edges but in the middle of the tall pillar was a breathtaking photo of the couple. It must have been taken at their wedding. Rose was looking off at something outside the shot, but Emmett was looking at her. The focus was slightly blurry and it was in black and white, but it was easy to see the love in his eyes. Bella felt like she was interrupting a private moment and with a lump in her throat, turned towards the house. She was startled when she found Rose standing not a foot behind her.

"That was right before we left for our honeymoon. My brother Edward took it." She whispered, stepping forward to run her finger over his image. "He told me every day how much he loved me, and I never got tired of hearing it. When the first Tsunami warning came in, he wanted to go up to the roof, but I told him it was just a warning and nothing to be worried about. You see, I had just painted my nails and didn't want to have to put shoes on. So we waited. And not three minutes later it sounded like a freight train was coming. The water rushed in so fast, it pulled both of us out the window. I held onto him as long as I could, but he must have hit his head as the water dragged him out the window. When the water receded, I had no choice but to let him go." Rose said quietly, the sounds of the forest behind them giving her story a soft background.

"I stayed there for weeks, looking everywhere trying to find his body. I wanted something to bring home." She whispered and Bella took a step forward, closer to her friend but Rose's head snapped up, eyes staring.

"And now I punish myself by giving away what was his like some kind of currency. I hate myself…every time I do it, but I can't stop. The disgust and hatred I feel when I whore myself out are the only things I feel anymore. So I can understand a bit of what you are feeling when you lock yourself in the bathroom after a search. I might not be out there with you looking for survivors, only finding death, but I have been. I've done it and I will never forget the feeling. I live with it…everyday." She said before pushing past Bella and falling to her knees at the foot of Emmett's memorial. Bella stayed for a moment before slowly walking back into the house.

**I am such a bitch…I just now realized we don't meet Edward yet! Oh am I a bitch or what? If you leave me enough love I might post the next chapter early. **

***Review h00r* **

**who said that?**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: See…I might be a review h00r but at least I am an honest one. Extra chapter for you. Still getting one on Saturday as well!**

****I am awed by the support for this story so far. To be honest…I am connecting with these characters so much that they are all I think about. Bakeryward is getting jealous.****

******Melanie is away at a wedding this weekend, so I am holding down the fic fort while she parties.******

********Dalloway5906 got a few new readers for her 'Reboot' but I know there are more of you out there who want to read about her insecure Edward, I mean come on…we all love a shy guy.********

******To answer some questions: Bella is 23 and Edward is 26******

*********Warning for this chapter...death of a child is discussed.********

********Here comes Lensward…********

Bella all but sleepwalked to her room after dinner. Rosalie had plastered on her fake smile after she came in from the back yard, but it fooled no one. Esme and Carlisle were so happy to have them there to celebrate the holiday and the ham Esme had worked on all day was delicious. Jake had his fair share of nibbles by using his droopy eyes and head tilt to charm the diners. With full bellies, Bella and Jake made their way up to their room. Jake did his business outside before he clamored up onto the bed and waited for Bella. She was asleep the instant her head hit the pillow.

"Bella. Bella, wake up." Rose whispered as she gently shook her friend's shoulder. Bella came awake slowly as if emerging from a deep, dark pool. Jake grumbled next to her as she rolled over and faced Rose.

"What's up?"

"I got a call from the local police; they knew I was in town. They had a little boy go missing from an Easter egg hunt this afternoon. They have had no luck with their K9 unit and wondered if I had anyone here with me." She said quietly as Bella sat up, rubbing the sleep from her eyes and trying to tame her wild hair.

"Yeah, yeah…just give me a few minutes to get Jake ready." Bella said and Rose squeezed her hand in gratitude before running from the room.

**()*()**

When Rose pulled back into the Cullen's driveway five hours later, the car was silent. Bella noticed a bright red Chevy Nova sitting on the grass as she walked up the steps, but at this point the only thing she wanted was to get in the tub.

"I'm sorry Bella…If I had known," Rose said quietly as Bella started up the stairs, Jake following behind.

"Rose…it's not your fault. You couldn't have known he was dead." Bella said, her voice emotionless as she made her way to her room. She was thankful she had her own bathroom as she tossed her clothes off and filled the tub. Jake collapsed in a heap next to the tub, too tired to even keep his head up. Once the tub was filled, Bella opened the drain so she could keep the water running to try and mask her sobs. It hurt…it hurt so much watching those parents realize their son was not coming home. He had wandered away from the park during the Easter egg hunt and fell into a fast running creek. The local K9 dogs were unable to scent in the water, while that was one of Jake's special skills. Jake found him three miles down river. He whined the whole way home, to the point that his bark was hoarse now.

After an hour in the water, Bella got out, pausing only long enough to dry herself off before falling into bed naked.

**()*()**

"I thought you were in Afghanistan." Rose said as she came into the kitchen. She had seen his car in the yard and knew it went wherever he went but it was still a surprise to find him there.

"Yeah…they sent me home. Something about getting burnt out." He answered as he tipped his glass back, the deep golden liquid streaming down his throat. Rose scoffed at him before sitting in the chair next to him.

"You have been burnt out for nearly a year…what changed?" She asked quietly, knowing she was treading on dangerous ground. He laughed humorlessly before replying.

"I kinda tried to choke one of the soldiers. They said I was a 'threat to myself and others.'" He said, doing the stupid air quotes around the words. Rose bit her tongue to keep from lashing out at her brother, knowing he was on a slippery slope of self destruction. The problem was…she was on the same path. Instead, Rose stood and put her arms around his shoulders, giving him a sloppy kiss on the cheek.

"I love you Edward. I just wish you would stop trying to get yourself killed." She whispered as she released him and walked towards her room, hoping the sleeping pills she took would help to keep away her nightmares.

Edward sat at the kitchen table long after his sister had left. His parents were at work thankfully and he was alone. It was times like these, when everything was quiet that the memories came back…killing him each and every time.

**()*()**

"Edward…just stand over there by that rock." Tanya yelled as she stood in front of her tripod. The rest of the class was behind her, watching as she set up the shot. It had been a great honor for their photography class to be invited to come along with the National Geographic team as they documented the rebuilding of Iraq after the war tore the country apart. They had armed escorts, but at this point the soldiers were spending more time gawking at Edward's classmates in their short-shorts and itsy tank tops as the girls tried anything to beat the heat. Tanya, Kate, Heidi and Maria were all seniors, just like he was. Mike, Tyler and Ben were juniors. They had been together in class for the last four years and thought that this trip would help them beef up their portfolios, the images they captured of a war torn wasteland nearly guaranteeing them a spot with National Geographic or Time magazine when they graduated. They had been there for nearly a week when they stopped along a caravan route leading from the capital city, Baghdad to Kirkuk, a particularly hard hit area.

The guards stood leaning against the van as his classmates joked and prodded him, trying to get him to smile as they took pictures. Edward finally relented and a grin spread across his face just as Mike took a step back, his foot hitting a hidden land mine and he watched as his friends disappeared in a blast of sand and fire. Pain lanced through his side as he was hit with flying shrapnel and he collapsed to the sand, his eyes tearing. The guards rushed forward, pulling him up by his arms as he screamed and called for his friends. He was the only one who came home.

The pictures he took during that trip and his experience in Iraq did indeed secure him a job with National Geographic as a war photographer. He traveled anywhere there was a conflict, and that seemed to be everywhere now a days. His family knew he was punishing himself for living while all of his friends died four years earlier, but it was more than that. He was trying to be the best he could, so that his friend's lives would not have been lost for nothing.

**()*()**

Edward set his empty glass in the sink and made his way up to the third floor. He stopped at the top of the steps, looking at one his photos his mother had framed and displayed on the wall. It was from that trip to Iraq, taken just a few days before the tragedy. The picture blurred and it took him a moment to realize that his eyes were full of tears. He shook his head and scrubbed at his eyes, cursing himself for his weakness. Just as he pushed his door open he heard a whining noise from the room opposite his. He turned around and stood with his ear pressed to the door, listening. The whine came again this time followed by a deep moan. Edward opened the door a crack and jumped back when a big black nose popped through the gap. He looked down into deep brown eyes and heard the whine erupt from the dog's muzzle. The dog stepped back and Edward followed, the light from the hall illuminating the figure writhing on the bed. Edward debated what to do for a moment, before he was pushed forward by the dog. He turned around and looked at him, and in return the dog gave him a look that said 'well…go on and help her.'

Edward knelt on the edge of the bed and reached his hands out, landing on soft, smooth skin. The moans subsided for a moment before she jolted up in bed, a scream dying on her lips. The covers dropped to her waist and the light from the hall fell across her bare chest. Edward gasped a breath as he took in her perfect breasts, flawless ivory skin and slim waist. He looked up at her frightened eyes and let go of her shoulder and sat back on his heels, his hands up in supplication.

"Hey now, I didn't mean to frighten you, you were having a nightmare. Are you ok?" He whispered, speaking only loud enough to be heard over her panting breaths. She shielded herself with her hands as she tried to get herself under control. The dream had been so real, images of that poor little boy mingling with a memory of a man lying broken and bloody in the front seat of a car. Without warning she started to cry, tears falling silently down her cheeks. Edward twisted his hands in his lap, suddenly wanting desperately to hold her but unsure how he would be received. His worrying was for not as seconds later she threw herself at him, her arms going around his neck as she buried her face in his chest. His hands came up to rest on her bare back and he held her against him as she wept.

********A/N: Poor Bella…will she finally let someone in?********

******I know that search dogs only scent on the air…but Jake is special…part werewolf. ;)******

******Next chapter…they actually have a conversation!******


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: You like me…you really like me! I am so glad you are all enjoying this little action filled trip so far. I just LOVE these two and am so excited to show you all what is coming. Texasbella is pissed that I have 15 chapters banked and am holding onto them so tight so I have decided to post on Wednesdays AND Saturdays. If I run out…we can just blame her.**

**Melanie is off dancing the night away at a wedding. Hope you are having a blast girly!**

**Dalloway5906 and I chatted via facebook yesterday about nothing and everything. Have you checked out her 'Reboot' yet? DO IT! **

**I posted a poll on my profile page concerning Emmett and Rose. I would LOVE to get your feedback. I have not decided what will happen yet and I am not saying that the popular vote will sway me, but I am interested in seeing what you think.**

**Ready for naked Bella?**

Both Edward and Bella thought things would be awkward after they pulled away from each other when Bella's tears stopped, but that was not the case. Jake jumped between then as soon as they separated, covering Bella's bits and pieces and breaking the tension by making them laugh. Edward got up and tossed Bella a shirt that was lying on the chair by the bathroom and she nodded her appreciation as she slid it on.

"Thank you." She said quietly as she stood, tugging on the hem of the shirt to cover her, umm…assets. Edward laughed and waved her off as he started towards the door. His head felt lighter than it had in years.

"No really," she said as she reached out to grab him, her fingers not even coming close to meeting around his thick wrist. "Thank you…for everything."

Edward nodded again with a smile and turned to leave. Bella made a quiet sound of distress and he spun back around. She was standing with her hair wild around her head, falling in waves down her back. Edward's fingers itched for his camera and he had to ball them into fists to keep from running across the hall to his room to find one.

"You're Edward, right?" She said softly, her hands twisting in the bottom of her shirt, unknowingly giving him glances of lean hips and a shadow at the apex of her thighs. It had been a long time since Edward had felt anything…but watching this girl, so comfortable in her own skin, was making his chest flutter. Unable to do much else, he nodded and her face broke out in a brilliant smile.

"I'm Bella. Jake and I work with Rose." She said and he was instantly alert.

"Jake?" He growled and the dog in question bumped his head against Edward's knee, making him lean to the side. Edward looked down at the dog with a smile.

"Jake?" He said, this time with a humorous edge to his voice and Jake chuffed an affirmative. Bella watched as her best friend took so quickly to Edward. Jake had always been cautious around new people, especially men. But with Edward, it was if he had known him his whole life.

"Well, I'll let you get back to sleep." He said as he rubbed behind Jake's heavy ears, earning him a groan.

"Yeah, like that'll happen." Bella mumbled under her breath, knowing that if she tried to sleep again, those nightmares would only return. Edward looked over at her with a shrewd frown, as if his own memories invaded his mind while he slept.

"Well, I guess I'll see you later." Edward said with one last pat to Jake's head. Bella smiled at him as he left, closing the door behind him. He walked the short distance to his room and flopped down on the bed, his hand falling across his chest, covering his heart. For the first time in four years it actually felt like it was beating.

**()*()**

"Thanks so much for having us." Bella said as she patted Esme awkwardly on her back. She was still uncomfortable with the Cullen's affection.

"Bella, please know that you are more than welcome anytime. I think Rose works you all too hard." Esme said with a smile and a well-timed nudge to Rose's ribs. Bella could tell that Rose had a rough day by the shadows that hid behind her smile.

"Well, we may just take you up on that." Bella responded as she picked up her pack and encouraged Jake to walk out with her. She had called a taxi to come and take her to the airport, ready to get home. She needed to get back to the classes at her training facility. She had a new group ready to start and had to make sure that they would be able to meet the Federal Emergency Management Agency K9 standards before they left the program. It worked well for Bella since she could set her own schedule and work around disasters.

Bella looked down the driveway and checked her watch, surprised that the taxi wasn't there yet. She looked up at the porch when she heard a throat clearing. Edward stood in the open doorway, a big duffle bag at his feet and a sheepish expression on his face.

"I may have called and cancelled your taxi." He said with a shy smile as he yanked his bag over his shoulder and sauntered down the stairs. Jake bounced happily around him as he walked towards Bella.

"And why, may I ask, did you do that?" She said, trying hard to stay aloof, but failing when Jake lolled his tongue at Edward and the man reciprocated by sticking his own tongue out.

"I'm heading to the airport so I thought I could give you a ride." He said, as if it were perfectly normal for them to be heading to the same place at the same time.

"Oh did you?" She said, her smile breaking through though she tried hard to keep it hidden. He stood in front of her and smirked, cocking his head to the side as he looked down at her.

"Yeah, I did." He whispered.

"Edward…what the hell are you doing?" Rose yelled from the door. She had watched the way her brother looked at Bella all day and was worried…for both of them. Rose jumped off the porch and stood between her brother and Bella.

"I'm giving Bella and Jake a ride to the airport, lil' sis. What's the problem?" He said casually as he walked over and plopped his bag in the trunk of his beloved 1969 Chevy Nova, Stella. She went where he went and when he was on location, he kept her in a secure lot at the airport.

"Well…" Rose faltered and looked up at her friend, making sure she was fine with the new arrangements. Bella nodded at Rose's unasked question and she had no other choice but to back off. She worried about both of them, knowing what was hiding underneath their calm exteriors. Together they were like dynamite just waiting to go off.

"Fine. Bella, I'll see you on Wednesday when I get back to town." Rose said and with a quick hug for her and pat for Jake, she went back in the house.

Edward pulled open the passenger door with a flourish and swept his hand out, encouraging Bella to get in. Jake did not hesitate as he jumped up on the leather seats and put his paws on the dash, looking out the windshield.

"What…where…why?" Edward sputtered as he watched Jake's nails sink into the supple leather he had worked so hard to restore. Bella laughed as she saw Edward's face turn a sickly shade of puce. With a quick whistle, Jake jumped in the back, his feet firmly on the floorboards and a sulky expression on his face.

"Oh thank you. All I could see was my poor leather meeting an untimely death." Edward said with an exaggerated sigh, his hand over his heart. Bella snickered as she settled herself into the seat while Edward tossed her pack in the trunk. The driver's side door slammed and she was overwhelmed with his proximity. The car smelled of leather with a faint hint of chemicals and a scent she was coming to recognize as Edward. She tried to be inconspicuous as she sniffed the air, but Edward noticed and laughed. He turned towards her as he started the car.

"It's the chemicals I use to develop my film. It gets into fabric and its hell to get out." He smiled as he faced forward and the car raced down the driveway. Bella held on for dear life as Jake smashed against the back seat.

"Shit…sorry. I don't think I've ever had anyone in the car with me before." He said with a shy smile as he adjusted his speed. Bella turned in the seat, her hands still gripping the seat tightly, and looked at him with incredulous eyes.

"You have never driven anyone…ever?" She said, her eyebrows creeping towards her hairline as she tried to process that information. Edward shook his head, his hands tightening on the steering wheel and his eyes trained on the road.

"Not in the last four years, and never anyone in this car." He said quietly. More questions were on the tip of her tongue, but judging from the firm set to his jaw they would not be well received. She turned all the way around in the seat to check on Jake and found him asleep, drooling on the leather seats. Bella turned back around with a grimace.

"Sorry about your seats back there. Do you have any paper towels or anything in here?" She asked shyly and Edward looking in the rear view mirror to see what she was talking about. He barked out a laugh and shook his head.

"Don't worry about it. Drool is better than nail holes any day."

The drive was quiet and comfortable and Bella was disappointed when they got to their destination. Edward pulled into a private parking lot, handing a silver card to the guard at the gate. The lot was small, maybe a total of 30 cars were parked in the covered structure. Edward drove into a numbered spot near the back and hopped out. Jake jumped out as soon as Bella's door was open and gave a great shake, his whole body vibrating as if celebrating being out of the cramped space. Since Jake was technically classified as a service animal, he did not have to ride in the cargo hold, instead Bella paid for him to have his own seat.

The three of them walked into the airport, Edward laughing when Jake huffed as Bella put a leash on him, but rules were rules. As soon as that collar went on, Jake shifted into business mode and he behaved perfectly as they got through security, his attitude coming out when he gave the TSA agent a dirty look as she lifted up his tail to check for contraband.

Edward's flight was scheduled to leave first; he was heading to New York to meet with his editor about his 'mandatory vacation.' He did not mention this to Bella, only telling her he had a meeting to get to. They chatted about work and what they did during down time, to which both of them admitted they did not have much of. Bella discovered that Edward had a home in Seattle he did not use as well as an apartment in Manhattan he tended to stay at often. Edward asked how Bella settled in Kansas City and why she started in Search and Rescue. Neither one noticed that this was the usual 'first date' conversation or that they had gravitated closer to each other as they spoke. It was not until Edward's flight was called over the loud speaker that they jumped apart. Edward stood slowly, dreading their separation. He turned and looked at Bella and Jake, the dog's massive head resting comfortably in Bella's lap.

"I'm…I'm really glad I finally got to meet you." Bella said shyly, not willing to admit to him that she had been dying to meet him ever since she first saw his picture in Rose's apartment. "That picture you took of Emmett and Rose at their wedding…the one on the pillar…it's beautiful." Edward looked down at his shoes, a faint blush coloring his neck and ears.

"Thanks. That was the last picture of them together." Edward said, and left it at that. They both knew what happened next. Edward scuffed the toe of his shoe on the floor and adjusted his bag on this shoulder before crouching down in front of Bella and Jake. Jake lifted his head from Bella's lap and bumped it into Edward's chest, making him laugh, his arms swinging in the air as he tried to keep his balance. Bella smiled down at the two of them as Edward rubbed behind Jake's ears and the dog grumbled happily.

"I'm happy I got the chance to meet you." Edward said without looking up. Bella nodded and held her hand out for Edward to shake. He took her delicate hand in both of his, turning it over and bent down, gently placing his lips on her palm. Bella took a shallow breath as he looked up at her, his green eyes holding more secrets than she could ever imagine.

"I'm sure we'll meet again." Edward whispered as he stood up and walked away without a backwards glance. Jake put his head between Bella's thighs and whined, and Bella wanted to do the same thing as she watched him walk away.

**A/N: Awwww.**

**See you Wednesday.**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Hi! Everyone have power and are safe on dry land after the hurricane? We finally have power again after three days without! ARG! Not fun after a while, let me tell you. **

**Melanie rocks my socks and makes sure I am staying in line. I am thinking of sending her a flogger to use…wait…wrong story. **

**Dalloway5906 made it through the hurricane and I know she is happy to see the sun shining again. Big kisses to you Dally.**

**Midnight Cougar is AWESOME and rec'd 'Search and Rescue' on the blog she authors. Check it out, I am SOOO excited she did that…she usually does not rec WIP. **

**http:/ robattack . wordpress . com/2011/08/26/fanfiction-fridays-recs-for-aug-2611/ **

**Arc Morpheus humbles me when she reads my words…that is all.**

**This chapter might be a bit hard to handle…again dealing with death. **

"Hello…can you hear me? I called for the rescue team, they'll be here in a minute…just hold on!" Bella shouted into the collapsed building. The Midwest was having a record number of tornados this spring and she and Jake had been searching the small town of Joplin, Missouri for hours. The local hospital had been nearly wiped off the map. The nearly mile wide EF-4 twister tore the town apart.

"Please!" A disembodied voice called from the dark recesses of the house, begging for help Bella and Jake could not give. All Bella could do was radio in their position and wait for help to come.

"I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere." Bella yelled, trying desperately to keep her tears from coming out in her voice.

**()*()**

Four hours and two body bags later the house was cleared. The family had been unaware that the monster tornado was approaching as they sat down for dinner. The parents dragged their children into the only bathroom and put them in the tub, crawling on top of them as the twister hit their house straight on. When the wind pulled one of the children from his mother's grip, the father reached out and grabbed hold of the little boy's leg and…the tornado took them both. The mother and three other children survived, but the father and little boy were lost.

Bella sat on the curb of what used to be a beautiful home in a well to do neighborhood. Now it was all destroyed.

"Bella…come in Bella." Rose's voice echoed out of the radio. Jake looked up at her from where he sat at her feet.

"Yeah Rose?" She replied, feeling a bone deep exhaustion settle in. God she was tired.

"They called off the search. Hitch a ride back to the command post." Rose answered and Bella gave an affirmative before dragging her ass up to find a humvee.

**()*()**

"Are you sure your parent's won't mind me crashing their party?" Bella asked for the third time as they gathered their luggage at the baggage claim at SeaTac. Rose had pretty much insisted that Bella and Jake come home with her to Seattle after the Joplin tornado.

"Bella…it's a Memorial Day picnic not a funeral. What is one more extra mouth?" Rose said, laughing when Jake chuffed. "Ok, two extra mouths. Plus I already told my Mom you were coming…so now you have to."

It did not take much to convince Bella to come with Rose. Deep down she was hoping that Edward might be there. It had been two months since she had watched him walk away and get on that plane to New York and while she had tried not to, she found herself scouring the pages of National Geographic searching for his name and photographs, looking for any signs of where in the world he might be.

"Bella…come on!" Rose shouted as she flirted with the skycap so he would bump them ahead of the rest of the people waiting in line. Bella watched as Rose's face completely changed once they were settled in the taxi and on their way to her parent's house. The coy smile just melted away and she looked older than her 30 some years.

"Rose, you doing okay?" Bella asked quietly as Jake stuck his head through her legs, settling down on the floorboards.

"Yep." Rose answered and Bella knew from her tone that the subject was to be dropped.

**()*()**

"No Carlisle, let's set up the tables over by the pool." Esme commanded as she put the silverware out on the deck with the plates. Bella had been roped into making dessert after Esme burnt two batches of cookies while trying to balance all of the other things she was preparing. She watched out the kitchen window as Carlisle shifted the tables one way and then the other as Esme directed him.

"No, now it is too much in the sun. Let's move it back the other way." She sighed as she placed the napkins down and walked through the grass to show him exactly where she wanted it. Bella snorted when she saw the way Carlisle was looking at his wife, ready to kill was an apt description. She wondered if her parents would still be this much in love if…

"Nice snort." Bella spun around; her hands covered in cookie dough and looked at the newcomer standing in the doorway, all thoughts of her past forgotten as she looked him over.

Edward looked tired, exhausted really. His eyes were sunken and his skin was paler than she remembered it. His hair, which was in its usual wild disarray around his head, looked limp and greasy. He was leaning against the doorframe as if it were the only thing keeping him upright.

"Whatcha making?" He asked as he walked towards her, with a very noticeable limp.

"What happened?" Bella asked quietly as he got closer. She could see the dirt and dust on his clothes and wondered when the last time he showered was. He shook his head and stood in front of her, his eyes drinking her in like he was drowning and she was his lifeline.

"Tell me." She whispered and he finally raised his eyes to meet hers.

"I got nicked by enemy fire in Kabul." He admitted as he reached past her to stick a finger in the bowl behind her.

"Did you get it looked at before you left?" She asked, pushing herself against the counter behind her to avoid having his body touch hers…because she would not be held accountable if her skin made contact with his.

"Nope. I headed back the minute Mom told me you were coming here for the holiday." He said shyly, sticking his dough covered finger in his mouth, Bella's eyes following the motion. His lips puckered around his finger and his eyes fluttered closed. "Mmmm, that is good."

"What is going on with you?" She breathed and he opened his eyes and looked down at her, his bright green eyes flashing.

"What is going on with _you_? You look like you're the walking dead. I tripped over Jake in the front hall, he barely moved when I came in. Where have you been?" He demanded, suddenly looking a lot less fatigued.

"We were in Missouri." She said, but his blank stare made her elaborate. "A big tornado hit a town called Joplin. 117 people were killed."

"And how many of them did you find?" He snarled, suddenly enraged that she had been witness to so much loss. "How many hours were you out there, wading through the remains of people's lives looking for bodies?"

Bella was suddenly on the defensive.

"I was trying to find _survivors_. I worked as long as I needed to until they called off the search." She said, pushing at his chest and forcing him to take a step back. But suddenly that was not enough. She followed him as he moved, staying right in his face.

"And yes, I found a lot of bodies, but I also found ten people that are alive right now because of me and Jake. So yes, it was hard to see broken picture frames and forgotten toys, but when the rescuers brought out those three little babies…" Bella said, but broke down before she could finish.

This was what Edward wanted for her. He wanted her to just let it go, not to hold it inside of her until it burst free in her dreams. He could not let go of his own demons, but there was no way in hell he would let Bella go through the same things he did. Bella's knees went weak and she started to sway, but Edward was there to catch her, gunshot wound and all.

**A/N: Phew…they are both hiding so much. We will find out what happened to Bella soon…I promise.**

**Your reviews make me smile**

**See you Saturday!**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: You love me, you really love me. And this story too! It is overwhelming…your support.**

**Thanks to the usual suspects…Arc Morpheus, texasbella, kitties1…you rock my socks!**

**Melanie had the funniest review ever last chapter, wondering if Lensward ever met Sugarward. Haha girly. That would be a fun time…may have to work on that one!**

**Dalloway5906…only a few weeks until our playdate…and the kids will play as well but without the wine. **

**Rocky road ahead folks…rocky road.**

"Edward…Edward what's going on?" Rose yelled when she heard Bella sobbing. She had been up in her bedroom, staring out the window at Emmett's monument, her usual pastime when she was at her parent's house, when she heard the noise from downstairs. When she saw her friend crying in her brother's arms she was instantly alert.

"She needed this Rosie. She needed to let it out." He said softly as he ran his hand down her hair. Jake had come in from the front room and lay down next to them, whining softly.

"I'm fine…I'm fine. I'm sorry to have worried everyone." Bella said, her voice stuffy and weak as she tried to push away from Edward and get to the sink so she could wash her face. She pushed down on Edward's leg as she tried to stand and he yelped, startling everyone. Bella looked up at him, her eyes red-rimmed and puffy.

"Will you let me take care of you now?" She asked and when he nodded she sent Rose on a hunt for the first aid kit. Bella got up from the floor and held her hand out to him, taking his weight as he limped up from the floor. After a moment of awkwardness, Edward sat down at the kitchen table and tried to pull his pant leg up so Bella could get to the wound. He fought with the fabric before giving up.

"Just…take them off." Bella said quietly, turning her back on him so he would not see her flaming cheeks. She heard a rustling behind her just as Rose came back in with the first aid kit.

"Ha…nice boxers brother of mine." Rose laughed as she put the kit on the table for Bella. She used her years of training to gather the supplies she needed and turned towards Edward. He was sitting with his leg up on the chair next to him and a grimace on his face. She looked down at the boxers in question and bit her lip to keep from laughing. They were black and covered in little cameras and spools of film.

"They were a joke. I was out of clean ones so I had to wear these." He grumped as Bella knelt down next to him and inspected the wound. It was ugly and red, the skin around it swollen and inflamed. It looked painful. She glanced up at Edward before she reached for a peroxide swab.

"You ready for this?" She asked quietly, wishing they had some tequila for him to drink before she started this.

"Believe me…I've had worse." He said, his voice dead. Bella glanced up at Rose but she had a detached look on her face as if she was thinking of something she would rather not be. Bella took a deep breath before she pressed the swab against the gash, getting a better look at it as she cleaned off the blood. The back door slammed and they all looked up to see Esme and Carlisle come in from the back yard.

"Oh Edward…what happened?" Esme gushed, nearly pushing Bella aside to pull him into her arms.

"I'm fine mom, just a little scratch, right Bella?" He said, looking down at her pointedly. Carlisle came up and looked over Bella's shoulder, inspecting her work.

"Looks good darling, just make sure you use some butterflies to close it and keep it covered. Nice job nurse." Carlisle said as he patted her on the back.

"Thanks Dr. Cullen." Bella said quietly, embarrassed that she was working on Edward's injury and not his father, who was a well known physician. Bella grabbed the antibiotic cream and drew a line of it down the gash before taping it closed with the butterfly bandages. When she was finished she covered it all with gauze and tape. She hesitated then, as she sat on the floor at his feet. The room was buzzing around them with activity as his family got ready for their picnic. She felt like such an intruder.

"Stop." He whispered from above her. She kept her head down but raised her eyes to him, her chest tightening at the gentle look on his face.

"Don't over think things. You belong here." He said as he slowly got to his feet and grabbed his pants, disappearing out of the room and up the stairs.

"You do too." She whispered to his empty chair.

**()*()**

"Bella…come and take a turn at bat." Esme called as Bella sat on the grass and watched the Cullens and their friends play an impromptu game of whiffle ball. Bella reluctantly stood up, brushing the grass off of her hands and grabbed the bat. She settled into her stance and trained her eye on the ball, praying she would not embarrass herself. The pitcher, one of Carlisle's colleagues from the hospital, tossed the ball towards her and she swung, smiling widely when she made contact and watched the ball sail towards left field. She took off running to first base, her legs pumping madly as she laughed, praying she made it before they could tag her out. Her foot hit the make-shift base just as the ball sailed over the first baseman's head and she sprinting wildly towards second, her lungs burning as she tried to breathe over her laughter. Safe at second she looked around at the other players, noticing that they all were looking towards the deck. She raised her hand up to shield her eyes from the glaring sun and noticed Rose standing on the steps, her face grim and her eyes trained on her. Without even having to hear the words she knew their little vacation was over.

**()*()**

"The transport leaves from SeaTac in an hour. What do you need me to do to help?" Rose asked as Bella ran around the room, grabbing her clothes and toiletries. Jake stood at the doorway watching Bella.

"Can you take him out and make sure he does what he needs to do?" She asked quietly as she pulled her boots out of her bag. She was glad they were already on the west coast; it would make the trip to Australia much shorter. They had been watching the rising flood waters carefully, but with a new wave of rain, the already overwhelmed creeks and rivers could not handle it and large sections of the country were under water. Mud slides and eroding roadways were making it hard for rescuers to get to the injured and stranded.

"Where are you going?" Bella heard from the doorway and spun around, amazed at Edward's stealth-like ability.

"Australia." She said as she shoved her feet into her boots and grabbed her bag from the bed. She had everything she needed packed away and was ready to go, ahead of schedule. She might even be able to get something to eat before they had to head out. Bella turned to leave but Edward stood blocking the doorway. She lowered the bag to the floor and looked up at him, his expression unreadable.

"Why?" He asked quietly as he shoved his hands into the pockets of his well worn and low slung jeans. Bella cocked her head to the side as she tried to interpret what he was asking.

"Why what?"

"Why do you do this? Risk your life on the off chance that maybe you will find someone alive?" He asked, his face a perfect picture of confusion and anger.

"Why do you go into a warzone just to take pictures?" She snarled, her defenses up around him, like always.

"You _know _why I go." He growled back, his hands coming out from his pockets, curling into fists. She stepped closer, getting right in his face.

"No…I have no idea why you go. Is it the fame? The money? The pussy?" She said, her nose inches from his as she stood on her tiptoes. His green eyes flashed with pain and hatred and she almost regretted what she said.

"I know Rose told you, so stop playing dumb." He said, his voice filled with venom. Bella's lip curled up in a snarl at his tone.

"Rose has told me nothing about you with the exception that you work as a photographer for National Geographic and that you took that picture at her wedding. I know _nothing_!" Bella jumped when Edward wrapped his hands around her shoulders, spinning them around and slamming her back up against the wall. Here eyes were wide as she looked up at him.

"You know! I _know_ you know so stop lying. It's why you are so nice to me. It's why you look at me so soft, so sweet. It's why you took care of my leg." He said, his voice barely above a whisper but full of so much pain.

"I took care of you because you needed it, just like you took care of me. And I am nice to you because you deserve for people to be nice to you." She said quietly but watched as his face turned murderous.

"I deserve nothing. And I don't want your pity." He spat before releasing her and stalking out of the room.

**A/N: Poor Edward…things go down hill from here for a while.**

**Have faith people…have faith.**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Hi all! Wow…did I have a busy weekend or what? If you missed it, I started a drabble story on Saturday night and ended up finishing and posting all 40 chapters before Sunday afternoon. Go check it out if you are interested in meeting a Dirty Runner Girl and Voyeurward.**

**It's called 'From my Window.'**

**And maybe…if you would like to you could head over to The Lemonade Stand and vote for it in the poll? It ends tonight so it would be AMAZING if you would do that…pretty please!**

**tehlemonadestand . blogspot . com**

**Your reviews for the last chapter were wonderful! I am so glad you are connecting with Edward and Bella. Things are about to get a bit rocky and I will tell you that we are getting very close to the prologue…very close.**

**Big hugs to Melanie who talked me through a really rough spot in a future chapter and ended up changing the entire vision of the story. She rocks.**

**Dalloway5906 posted another chapter of 'Reboot' so go and check that out…she is the icing to my cupcake!**

**Now…if you are not too busy and would like to go and cast your vote in the Tomato Soup Awards, The Bakery and Darkness and Light are nominated as well as Melanie, (Edward's Eternal) for Best Beta, Dalloway5906 for best pre-reader and we have a shit-ton of you readers up for Best Reviewer. **

**thetomatosoupawards . blogspot . com **

**Ummm…tissue warning?**

"Cullen! Cullen get your ass back in here…you wanna get killed?" Amun yelled as Edward stood in front of their tent. It was July in Kandahar and it could not have been hotter. While it was safer for them to stay in the tents, the heat was unbearable. It had gotten up to 105 degrees during the day and now at night it was not much better. Instead of bringing cooler air, the whipping wind brought with it sand that stung the skin and blinded the eyes. It did not matter to Edward; all he felt was pain anymore.

His sister had called the day before to tell him that she and Bella were heading to their parent's house for the fourth of July. He wanted to see her again…God he ached to see her. But he knew there was no point in it, no point at all.

"Cullen I refuse to explain to our boss why you are coming back to New York in a body bag now get back in the fucking tent!" His fellow journalist growled as he reached outside the tent and grabbed the back of Edward's shirt. They both fell inside just as the sky lit up with gunfire. Edward crawled over his tent mate and scrambled for his camera. Lying on his belly he stuck the lens of his camera under the edge of the canvas tent, using the angle to capture the bullets as they streaked across the sky.

His memory card filled up quick, but that was because he refused to erase all the pictures from it. He pulled the camera back inside and set it on the edge of his sleeping bag, reaching for his laptop so he could upload the newest images. After he was done, he held the camera in his hands and stared down at the pictures he refused to get rid of, wishing he had been able to capture more images of her.

Bella.

He had taken several of her during the whiffle ball game on Memorial day, her smiling face and wild hair now permanently etched on both his memory stick and his mind. He also had one of her staring off into nothing, as if she had finally been able to relax for a moment. He liked that one the best…he thought it showed who she really was.

He had spoken to his sister several times since that day and she had handed him his ass. She wanted to know what he was doing with Bella, why she was so upset and withdrawn. This was the one thing he did not want to have happen. She formed an attachment to him and now she was suffering because of it. This was why he never dated…why for the last 4 years he had been celibate. There was no reason for anyone to spend even a second of time thinking about Edward Cullen. He was a waste of time and space.

**()*()**

"Rose…can I borrow your phone for a minute, mine's dead." Bella asked quietly as they rested at LAX before their connecting flight to North Korea. They were heading over to help the local search and rescue teams locate the missing after a massive typhoon hit the country. China and South Korea were hit as well but North Korea took the brunt of it. Rose was lounging in one of the uncomfortable plastic chairs as they waited for their transport, her nose buried in her iPad. She reached her hand down into her bag blindly and handed up her phone. It only took a second for Bella to send herself a text with Edward's number.

It had been more than two months since she had seen him. She had hoped he would be at his parent's house for the fourth, but Esme said he was 'on location' and could not make it back. She called bullshit on that one. He was scared and she knew it.

She took out her own phone and programmed his number in, her fingers itching to call him right then and there, but she knew it was only a few minutes before they would be boarding their flight. Instead she pulled up her text messages and watched the little cursor blink as she waited for her brain to come up with something good. Finally, desperate to connect with him before she went overseas she typed a message and hit send before she could think twice.

_Edward…don't hide from me._

**()*()**

Damn she was a pain in his ass. He knew the text was from her the moment his phone chimed. No one sent him text messages…but it was clear as glass that this one was from the one person he could not stop thinking about. He held the phone in his hands and stared at those five little words.

Fuck.

She knew exactly what she was doing. She was goading him into responding even though he knew the smartest thing to do for the both of them would be to just go their separate ways. Their lives were too busy and hectic to have anyone else in them…and for Edward, happiness was just not in the cards. His freedom to feel happiness or even contentment went up in flames when he was the one to walk away from the blast that killed all of his friends.

What could he offer her? He lived out of a suitcase and didn't form any lasting connections to anyone around him.

He was a wasteland.

And she deserved better.

**()*()**

Bella sat heavily on the bench, her hair and clothes covered in the mud that seemed to be everywhere in the little village. They were along the coast, trying to find some of the several hundred people that were missing after the powerful storm came ashore. Jake had managed to find three survivors…and twelve bodies. God she hated this…hated the ache that settled in her chest when Jake would start his whine and bounce only to realize moments later that it was too late.

She needed a break.

Rose warbled through her radio and she answered that they were on their way back to the command center. She stood; her body feeling like it had been through a war and reached for Jake's vest. He needed a break too. She just hoped that nature would cooperate.

Her phone chimed with an incoming text and for a moment her heart stopped. It was him…she knew it was him. She dropped Jake's vest and with shaky fingers pulled her phone from her pocket. It seemed to take forever for her to get it open and see the new message, but when she did…time stood still.

_Stop…just, stop._

So she did. Feeling like her boots were full of sand, Bella stopped. She stopped caring, she stopped crying, she stopped everything. If it had been possible she would have stopped breathing. She went back to the command center, caught the first transport back to the States and went home. She did not answer her phone…she did not do anything but lie in bed and try to get the vision of pain-filled green eyes out of her head.

It didn't work.

**A/N: Deep breath…**

**See you Saturday!**

**Go Vote! (Please!)**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: I came in third in the Lemonade Stand poll thanks to all of you…so I decided to post early. Psstt…do you know who is doing my review? CARA NO! I know right?**

**You guys deserve all the credit for that…and I am going to try harder to reply to more reviews cause you guys deserve to know how much your words mean to me.**

**Melanie is the vodka to my cosmopolitan and I could not do any of this without her. You went and voted for her and Dally in the Tomato Soup awards right?**

**Dalloway5906 is suffering from the back to school blues…do me a favor and go read and review her 'Reboot' and give her a little happy!**

**Ready to get to the prologue?**

**Just remember you love me…okay?**

The phone was a very unwelcome wake-up call. Bella had only been asleep for a few hours when the ringing jolted her awake. Blindly reaching for her nightstand, her fingers fumbled to accept the call.

"Swan." She grunted, making sure that whoever had rudely awakened her knew she was pissed.

"I need you both at the tarmac in an hour." Her best friend Rose replied, her voice tight. Even though she had not heard from her friend in over a month, Bella was instantly up and alert.

"Where?" She answered as she jumped from the bed and pulled her always-ready pack from the closet.

"Washington." Rose whispered and Bella dropped the jeans she had in her hands, her fingers suddenly numb.

"Where?" She whimpered, knowing from Rose's tone that she already had her answer.

"Yes Bella, home."

**()*()**

Bella felt the phone slip from her fingers but just as quick she reached down and grabbed it…eager to get any more information about what had happened.

"Rose?" Bella breathed into the receiver, her hand gripping the phone so tightly she heard the case creak.

"Earthquake. They think the epicenter hit just a few miles from Seattle. The first reports have it at a 8.6. It was big and Bella…it was bad. Get to the airport as soon as you can." Rose said quickly, sounding like she was packing her bag as they spoke.

"Have you spoken to anyone?" She asked as she tugged the jeans up her legs one handed and pulled her bag from the closet. Jake had been alerted by the tone of her voice and was already off the bed and heading downstairs and outside.

"I talked to my dad; he managed to find a working satellite phone at the hospital. My mom…" She said but had to stop talking as she choked up. "My mom was at home and he has not been able to get in touch with her."

"I'm on my way. Is everyone else coming with us?" Bella inquired as she slung the bag over her shoulder, trying to keep the image of green eyes and wild hair out of her mind.

_He was probably on location somewhere. He's not there._

"I'm sending Emily and Embry to where the epicenter hit but Riley is coming with us." Rose said before ending the call with a rushed goodbye.

Jake was already sitting at the door ready to go. Bella grabbed everything she needed and was gone, praying the entire way to the airport.

**()*()**

The command center was located at Virginia Mason Hospital which was where Rose's father was chief of staff. Thankfully the building was structurally secure but several people had been injured when the quake hit. Carlisle was in full command as Bella, Rose and Riley pulled up in the Humvees. They had been amazed at the devastation they passed on the way from the airport. Buildings were down everywhere and they had to avoid several bridges that had collapsed. Fires were springing up every where as broken gas lines ignited. It was a disaster.

"Oh Rose…thank God!" Carlisle said as he pulled his daughter into his arms. His calm façade cracked for a moment and Bella watched his face crumble as he held her against his chest. He pulled away, wiping his eyes and held her at arms length.

"Do you know where they are sending you yet?" He asked, nodding his head towards where they had a tent set up with maps spread across plastic tables, pushpins marking the areas that had been cleared and sections that still needed to be searched. Rose shook her head and he released her so they could go over and get their orders.

**()*()**

"I'm going with you." Rose said as Bella shifted her pack on her shoulder and helped get Jake into his vest. They were sending them to Rose's parent's neighborhood, and she knew Rose was scared.

"Rose…I need you to stay here and relay the information to the rescuers. You will be more help if you stay here." Bella replied, knowing she needed to stay firm. Rose started to shake her head, but everything stopped as an aftershock rippled through the ground making them all sway on their feet. Jake crouched down on his belly, staying low to the ground, whining pitifully.

"We need to go...now." Bella said, turning and leaving with Jake beside her. She knew it was killing Rose to be sitting there doing nothing, but if she came with her…Bella couldn't have Rose with her if she found bodies…she just couldn't.

**()*()**

"Go!" Bella commanded Jake as soon as they left the Humvee. The houses in the Cullen's neighborhood were spaced far apart and she could tell right away that the quality of the materials used in their construction helped keep most of them intact. The sidewalks were ripped up and broken and they walked in the street since it was less likely to trip over broken concrete or downed branches in the middle of the road. Jake had his nose to the ground as they walked around the houses. Bella knew since the earthquake had hit late in the evening, the chances that people would have been inside those houses were high. Jake started to whine as he dragged her to the house next to the Cullens. She wanted nothing more than to sweep their house and make sure that Esme was fine...but following Jake's instincts were more important.

"Heel Jake." Bella whimpered as they came around the back of the house and looked through the door and into the destroyed kitchen. A large wooden cupboard had fallen over on an elderly woman…there was nothing they could do. She radioed in the location and Rose told her they would alert the recovery team.

Jake walked slowly toward the Cullen's house as if afraid of what his nose might pick up. They stood at the edge of the driveway and looked at what was left of the majestic home. The majority of the windows were either cracked or gone completely. The wooden porch listed to the side and part of the roof had collapsed under the weight of a fallen tree. Bella held tightly to Jake's harness as they got closer. It took all of Bella's years of training not to just run into the house and search for Esme, but she stayed firm. She looked down at Jake, ready to give him the search command when a flash of red caught her eye and she turned her head, her heart jumping into her throat as tears flooded her eye.

Stella-Edward's Nova sat at the edge of the grass, the hood caved in as a tree sat atop it.

No…sweet Jesus no. He wasn't supposed to be here. He was on location, Bella told herself as she scrambled over towards the car, her hand letting go of Jake's harness. He took off after her, whining as he picked up on her distress.

The car was empty with the exception of a camera bag sitting on the passenger seat.

Bella spun around and scrambled up the steps, her hands blindly reaching for anything that could steady her as she slipped on the broken porch.

"Edward!" She screamed as she burst through the front door, her eyes taking in the cracked plaster walls and the glass that covered the ground. Bella heard a moan from upstairs and Jake was off, racing towards the noise.

"Edward!" Bella called as she got closer to the sound, but stopped short on the landing. Jake was heading towards the bedrooms on the second floor while Bella's heart was pulling her to the top floor…towards Edward's room. Her hands were shaking she looked longingly up the stairs but turned and followed Jake instead.

Bella had never been in Esme and Carlisle's bedroom before but she could tell that this was not what it usually looked like. A tree had come through the bay window that stretched across the entire west wall, bringing branches and leaves into the once neat and clean blue and gray room. Jake was standing, whining in an open doorway and before Bella could open her mouth to speak she heard another moan. She ran to stand next to Jake and her breath caught as she looked down at where Esme lay on the floor.

"Oh God, Esme." Bella cried as she knelt down next to her, immediately calling in their location and getting an ambulance to them as quickly as she could. She ignored Rose's frantic request for more information and reached for Esme's wrist, checking her pulse. It was strong and steady and she looked her over in search of injuries. Other than a pretty big bump on the head, she looked fine. Esme started to come to, her eyes blinking franticly as she moaned and raised her hand to her head. She looked up and her eyes filled with tears when she saw Bella and Jake.

"Oh Bella, what happened?" She rasped, using Bella's assistance to pull herself up. They walked together through the bedroom and downstairs onto the porch so they would be safe should any aftershocks come. They sat on the steps and as Esme looked over the yard her breath caught when her eyes landed on the familiar red car and she spun towards Bella.

"Edward…where is Edward?"

**A/N: You love me remember…**

**See you next week!**


	10. Chapter 10

**So…I need to stop working on these little weekend drabbles so I can actually get something accomplished. I tried so very hard to respond to reviews over the weekend but after I started posting 'Self Storage' my inbox filled up too quickly for me to keep track of. Like I seriously have 4K emails in there now. Crazy! But if I did not get to you…know that your words went straight to my heart.**

**The incomparable CaraNo and lvtwilight09 made me some spectacular banners for 'Self Storage.' They are on my facebook page if you want to check them out. They are really just amazing and I can't thank them enough!**

**Last week 'From my Window' came in third in the Lemonade Stand poll. Well…this week 'Search and Rescue' is in contention. It is up against some really great stories by some really great writers and I am not holding my breath to get in the top four, but you never know.**

**tehlemonadestand . blogspot . com**

**Melanie had me laughing so hard Sunday night I almost puked. I need her like a fat kid needs cake. **

**Dalloway5906 is posting new chapters of 'Reboot' twice a week now so go…get on that!**

**Ready….hold onto someone you love…**

"What do you mean Esme? Was he here when the earthquake hit?" Bella asked frantically, her hands griping Esme's shoulders tightly as she struggled to stop from running into the house. Esme shook her head, trying desperately to clear the cobwebs and remember what happened right before the earth trembled.

"He was here. He had come into our bedroom to let me know he was…" Esme said, her eyes going up to the house…to the top floor where a tree was imbedded into the roof.

"He was what Esme?" Bella nearly screamed.

"He was going up to his room." Esme whispered as her eyes filled with tears. Her body collapsed and Bella knew she should stay and comfort her, but her feet were already in motion. She had just stepped onto the porch when the ground shook beneath her feet. She swayed to the side, grabbing hold of the broken porch railing. Esme screamed as Bella heard a cracking noise and watched as the side of the rood collapsed, falling perilously close to where Esme and Jake were standing. The aftershock settled and Bella was torn. She had already radioed their location in, but it could be hours before someone got there. Esme had a concussion for sure and Bella knew she should stay with her, but she _needed_ to get to Edward. The house was a ticking time bomb.

Her decision made, Bella started towards the door, only to stop when she felt her shirt being pulled from behind. She spun around and came face to face with her best friend. Jake stood with his front feet on the porch and the back of her shirt clenched tightly between his teeth, his eyes pleading.

"I have to find him." She whispered and she could almost see Jake's eyes narrow in defeat. He released her with a huff and she kissed him on the nose before pointing towards Esme, thankful that he did not fight her, but went to sit next to Rose and Edward's mother. Bella grabbed a flashlight from her pack before she went inside the house, praying she found him…and soon.

**()*()**

**Five Hours Earlier**

He couldn't do it anymore. He had been avoiding everything for the last few weeks, but he knew it was time. His phone had been going off every few hours with calls from his sister and his mother. He knew what the voicemails would say.

_Come home Edward…you need to deal with this._

_They would not want you to live your life like this Edward._

_What did you do to Bella? She is not answering any calls except disasters and even then she is like a zombie. What have you done?_

_Edward…stop trying to ignore what happened._

Edward knew it was harder because the anniversary of the tragedy was coming up soon. Their University had asked him to come and speak at the memorial service they held every year, but as usual, he declined. It was too hard to see his friend's families, knowing that he survived, but they were gone.

Edward left Kandahar with a heavy heart, knowing he needed to talk to Bella so she understood that it was something that was deeply wrong with him…and had nothing to do with her. If he was whole…if he was normal she would be the exact person he could see himself with. She was so selfless and kind, beautiful and delicate. His fingers itched to trace her features, begged to take hold of the gentle flare of her hips and pull her against him. He could not deny that many mornings he woke up hard and aching, his subconscious mind having shown him vividly what it could be like between them. Her skin smooth, his rough. Her body soft and pliant, his hard and unyielding. Her voice would be breathless as she begged for more and his would be gruff as he urged her on, fingers searching for the spots that would make her explode. He would wake up panting and sweaty, his heart racing and fingers searching for something he could not have…something he did not deserve.

When he got off the plane at SeaTac, his first thought was of Bella and the time he spent with her in his car and waiting at the gate for their flights. He had not driven anyone in his car since the explosion, not even his parents. He could not take responsibility for anyone else's safety. But he had not given it a second thought when he escorted both Jake and Bella into his car.

His heart clenched in his chest when he pulled into his parent's driveway, memories of his time spent with Bella bombarding him as he grabbed his bag from the trunk and started up the stairs. His mother was beside herself when he popped his head into her room. She had pulled him into her arms and held him so tightly he had trouble breathing. He felt like shit when he felt her tears against his skin, but she was all smiles when she pulled away. He retreated to his room, hoping he might be able to escape into his dream life with Bella for a few hours before he decided what he was going to do next. His boss had pretty much told him his career was over if he could not get his temper under control, but at this point he was having trouble giving a shit if he never took another picture.

His eyes were closed as he lay on the bed. When the shaking started, his mind tired to incorporate it into his dream, having naked Bella trembled so hard as she came around his cock the bed shook as well. When the tree crashed through the roof, he imagined that it was the headboard breaking in his hands as he thrust against her. And as the bookshelf that housed his music collection tumbled around him, striking him on the head, the darkness that enveloped him were her arms around him as he fell asleep.

**()*()**

"Oh God, oh God, oh God." Bella chanted as she slowly made her way up the stairs. The path had been clear when she brought Esme down just a few minutes earlier, but the aftershock had thrown pictures off the wall, covering the wooden steps with glass. It crunched under the heavy tread of her boots as she sidestepped around the expensive silver frames and priceless family photos. Edward's smiling teenage face made her breath catch as she stepped over the photos and stood on the landing. The stairs leading to the third floor were clear as she started up towards Edward's room. His door was partially open and she had to throw her entire body against it to force it wide enough so she could fit through. The room was a disaster. He had floor to ceiling bookshelves along the majority of the walls and they had all fallen over with the force of the quake. His bed, which took up most of the room, was covered with what looked to be his CD and vinyl collection. The enormous tree that crashed onto the roof cut through the room like a wall. What made her heart pound in her chest was the fact that she could not see him anywhere.

"Edward?" She called as she stepped over clothes and books, carefully getting further into the room. The beam of her flashlight swept an arc over the chaos, trembling as her hand shook. She had to find him.

"Edward?" She whispered as her palms started to sweat and her legs threatened to buckle beneath her. She walked around the far side of the bed and…

There he was.

He was on his stomach, his upper back and head buried under a piled of books, one of the huge bookshelves resting on top of him. Bella did not hesitate as she threw the flashlight on the bed and reached for the debris. She thought she heard noises from outside, but the weeping and moaning she heard was coming from deep within her chest.

"Please no." She cried as she saw the blood on the floor…too much blood.

**You trust me…you trust me…you trust me…**

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	11. Chapter 11

**Hi all! So I am not going to say much cause I know you want to get to the good stuff. There is still a day left to vote in the poll at The Lemonade Stand but I am up against some serious competition. As of now I am in sixth place and I really don't know how I could get past those amazing stories ahead of me…but it is an honor just to be nominated (That sounded sincere right?)**

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**So…unless you want to hate me…you might want to just click on that X right now and wait till I post the next chapter before you read this one…just warning you.**

Bella tossed books this way and that trying to get to Edward. She could hear the sounds of sirens from outside and her heart pounded, worrying that they were already too late. She slipped a bit on the blood that was on the floor but managed to catch herself before she went down. Kneeling next to Edward's head, she was hesitant to move him. But she needed to see exactly where the blood was coming from. She cradled his head with one hand as she reached for his far shoulder with the other, using her body weight to pull him towards her. He ended up across her lap, his head held gently with her arm. His eyes fluttered as she felt along his scalp for injuries, finding the cause of the bleeding, a nasty gash above his ear. His pulse was strong and steady and she could not see any other injuries. Her biggest worry was getting him out of there as quickly as she could before another aftershock took the house down. The tree creaked ominously above them and she grabbed for her radio.

"Rose! I found Edward but I need help to get him out of here." She said, waiting to hear her friend's response. It took longer than she expected and when she finally did hear Rose's voice it was echoed through the house.

"I'm coming." Rose answered, and Bella could hear footsteps coming up from the second floor. Rose's blonde head popped through the partially opened doorway.

"Am I glad to see you." Bella heard from below her. She looked down to see that Edward had regained consciousness and was looking up at her, his green eyes filled with so much longing and pain.

"I've got you now…don't worry we will get you out of here." Bella responded, unable to stop her hand from running through his hair, trying to sooth him. He closed his eyes again and leaned into her touch, releasing a heavy sigh. Behind Rose came two EMTs and several firemen, anxious to get everyone out of the house before the tree brought it down. Bella relinquished her hold on Edward grudgingly, moving out of the way so the rescue workers could do their job. The second Bella's hands left Edward's skin; his eyes were open and searching for her frantically.

"Bella?" He called, a tinge of hysteria leaking into his voice as he worried her face and voice might have all been a dream. She leaned around one of the EMTs and his breathing relaxed as soon as he laid eyes on her.

"I'm here Edward. We are going to get you out of the house and to the hospital. Your mom is already on her way there." Bella said calmly, his hand grabbing for hers. He paled at the mention of his mother and was instantly concerned.

"What happened to my mom?" He asked, batting at the EMT as he tried to fit an oxygen mask on him. He was reprimanded and grudgingly allowed the mask to be placed over his mouth and nose.

"She hit her head but should be fine. Your dad is at the hospital and she'll be taken care of, don't worry." She soothed and watched his eyes flutter and then snap back open as if he were battling to stay awake. She reached past the EMT to run her fingers through his hair.

"Go to sleep…I'll be here when you wake up." She soothed and watched as his face relaxed and his eyes stayed closed, a small smile on his lips.

**()*()**

"Bella…I need you to head over to North Gate, they have a collapsed Elementary school. They were in the middle of a band concert when the earthquake hit." Rose said as they came down the stairs following the EMTs who were handling Edward's stretcher. Bella saw Jake sitting calmly at the edge of the porch and gave him a short nod to release him from his position and he went bounding over towards where they were loading Edward into the ambulance. After he made sure his buddy was alive, Jake came running back to Bella, sitting down at her feet.

"See, he's ready to work." Rose said and Bella looked up at her friend as if she were crazy.

"Do you really think I can go back out there and work while he is lying in the hospital?" She asked, unable to keep the anger from leaking into her tone. She knew her friend was a hard ass, but this was her brother they were talking about. Rose knew how Bella felt about Edward yet she was pretty much asking her to desert him.

"Bella…you know where he is and that he is safe. Think of all the other people out there whose family members are missing. Think of all the parents and little kids that could be trapped in that school. You are their only hope." Rose implored, her eyes glistening with tears as she remembered those days and weeks searching for Emmett. Bella embraced her friend quickly before running towards the ambulance. She jumped up on the back of the vehicle and leaned down, dropping a quick but meaningful kiss on Edward's still lips.

"I'll be back."

**()*()**

Three hours later Bella and Jake were dropped off at the hospital. They had managed to find every person that was missing, and the worst injury had been a broken wrist. Jake was bouncing at her feet as if knowing they were headed in to see Edward. Bella was not much better. The sound of his frantic voice calling for her echoed in her mind and she prayed that he was not too upset with her for not being there when he woke up.

Bella trudged into the lobby, overwhelmed with the amount of activity going on around her. She tugged Jake's leash closer to her so he would not trip anyone up as they made their way to the desk. There were three huge whiteboards behind the desk with numbers and names listed in different colors. She found two and realized the numbers next to the names were room numbers, and it looked like both Esme and Edward were in the same room. She headed up to the third floor and down toward room 308. As she rounded the corner, an alarm went off down the hall and a bunch of people went running into the room. Her heart pounded in her chest as she glanced at the number on the door she stood in front of. Some quick math gave her an answer she did not want.

Pulling Jake behind her she rushed to the open door, tears blurring her vision. Carlisle stood at the head of the bed just inside the door, holding a mask and bag over Edward's face, pumping oxygen into his lungs as numerous people worked around him. Esme was sobbing in the bed close to the window as Rose held her tightly, her cheeks streaked with tears. Bella turned back to Edward's bed, watching as they injected drug after drug into his IV line. The alarms were blaring as his heart rate and blood pressure continued to plummet until she heard the worst sound imaginable.

Flatline.

**See…I told you! You should have waited…I told you!**

**Saturday…**


	12. Chapter 12

**Early posting! YEAH! You can thank my girls over in Kitkat's Korner on facebook for that…**

**I tried so very hard to reply to reviews…but I failed. Know I love you…and your words. **

**I came in sixth in the Lemonade Stand poll, which was admirable considering who I was up against. Thank you to all of you who voted but I did not stand a chance against Awesomesauce, Cosmo and Sheviking.**

**Melanie fixed so many things in this chapter and I can't thank her enough for that. She is the salt to my margarita.**

**One week from right now I will be lounging in Dalloway5906's family room enjoying the first of many glasses of wine. Can't wait!**

**No one read that did they? I figured not…**

Bella held her breath as she watched the nurses and doctors work around Edward. His body jumped off the bed as they used the paddles to try and shock his heart into re-starting. Esme was crying hysterically and someone had taken over for Carlisle so he could hold his wife. No one noticed that Bella and Jake stood in the doorway as they watched Edward fight for his life.

Bella had never been more afraid.

She was afraid she would lose him before she ever really had him. She was afraid she might kill Rose with her bare hands for making her leave his side, losing those precious hours with him. She was afraid this might be the tipping point that would start her slow descend to darkness.

"We got a rhythm." A nurse shouted and Bella and Jake were pushed into the hall as Edward's bed was wheeled out of the room.

"Get an OR booked stat. We need to get in there before he codes again." Someone shouted as the room emptied. Carlisle was talking rapidly to someone in the doorway while Rose and Esme embraced inside. Bella leaned against the wall, Jake lying at her feet, staring at the closed doors Edward had just disappeared behind. God she hated hospitals. Other than on site at a disaster, she had not been inside one in nearly four years, not since…

Her eyes blurred with tears and she bit the inside of her cheek to get off that train of thought. Thinking of that night would not help anyone right now, least of all Edward who needed all the positive thinking she could muster. Carlisle turned around to go back in the room and caught sight of Bella and Jake. His blond hair was mussed and he looked exhausted but he managed a small smile for them, holding his arms out for a hug. Bella leaned against him stiffly, trying to keep her emotions under control. She pulled away and looked up at him, desperate for answers.

"He was fine when he left in the ambulance…I thought it was just a laceration." Bella said, worried she had missed something when she checked him over. Carlisle shook his head sadly and put a hand on her shoulder.

"No one could have known Bella. It seems he had some internal bleeding, they think it might be his spleen or pancreas. It was not until his blood pressure started to drop that we suspected anything and by then he had already started to crash." Carlisle said quietly.

"Was he awake at all?" Bella asked, dreading the answer. She had promised him she would be there when he woke up…and she wasn't.

"Yeah, he was in and out of consciousness for a while there. He asked for you…thought he had been dreaming. When Rose told him she sent you back out, he was livid." Carlisle said with a chuckle. Livid was an understatement, Edward had been furious. He had never seen his son that angry about anything.

"Well, I did tell him I would be there when he woke up, but Rose was right. Jake and I were more valuable out there than in here waiting, even if we would have rather been here." She said with a tired sigh as she reached her hand down and patted Jake's head. Carlisle gasped and Bella's eyes flew up to his face, worried.

"You love him don't you?" Carlisle whispered, a brilliant smile spreading across his face. Bella shook her head frantically, holding her hands up in front of her as if she could stop his words from infiltrating her brain.

"No…wait…hold up. Edward and I are just…well I guess you can't even say we're friends. We know nothing about each other and the last thing I heard from him was him asking me to stop." She defended, but her words sounded weak in her ears. She was right…she really did not know him at all. She did not know what kind of foods he liked to eat when he was drunk or how he took his coffee. What she did know about him could fit on an index card.

She knew he was kind and thoughtful, that he was an amazing photographer and loved his family dearly even if he did not always know how to show it. He treated his car better than most people treated their kids and for some reason she could not get him and his sad smile out of her head. She constantly wondered if he was happy or sad or in danger. She wanted to see him smile and laugh and be the reason for both. Did she love him…

Well fuck…maybe she did.

**()*()**

Three hours later they still had not heard anything. Carlisle had disappeared behind those closed doors every 20 minutes or so but always came back wearing that same cautious look, as if he did not want to say or think anything positive for fear he might jinx the outcome.

Bella had walked Jake outside to sniff around and do his business but other than that, her ass had not left those waiting room chairs. Carlisle had giving Esme something to help her sleep and Rose had come out to sit and wait with Bella and her father. As much as Bella wanted to be mad at Rose for making her leave Edward, she understood why she did it, and she couldn't get angry at her for wanting to try and help save as many people as possible. She just wished she could have been able to see Edward before he…

No, she thought, no negative thoughts. He will come out of the surgery just fine and then…

And then exactly. The last contact she had with him had been brief and to the point.

_Stop…just stop._

The problem was she had not wanted to stop. She wanted to push. She wanted to get inside of him and find out why he acted the way he did. What worried her was that if she got inside him…he might want to get inside her as well and no one but Jake and her mother knew what lurked behind the walls she carefully erected.

"Carlisle." A scrub wearing, blood covered doctor called from just outside the doors. He looked almost as exhausted as Bella felt, but the cautious smile on his face made her jump to her feet and follow behind Carlisle and Rose, Jake at her side.

"Looks good right now." He said, running a hand through his dark hair and tossing a wink to Rose. Ahhh…either a past or future conquest right there, Bella thought. She tore her eyes from Rose's fake smile and focused back on the doctor. "We had to remove part of his spleen and a section of his liver. He lost four liters of blood but we were able to run in type specific and he seems to be rebounding. I have him sedated for now. We should be able to start weaning him off the meds by morning."

"When can we see him?" Bella asked, ducking her head and flushing scarlet when everyone turned to look at her, Carlisle with a smirk and Rose looking flabbergasted.

"Uh…you can go in and see him one at a time." The doctor said before reaching out and shaking Carlisle's hand, pulling him aside to talk about a more clinical diagnosis. Rose spun towards Bella, holding her hand out towards Edward's recovery room in invitation.

"No, no. You go ahead. I need to take Jake out." Bella said, suddenly worried about how she might react seeing Edward hooked up to all those machines. She spun on her heel and ran towards the exit, Jake following close behind her. She burst through the front doors of the hospital, taking great gasps of air as she paced. Her heart was hammering in her chest, no doubt a delayed reaction to the news that Edward was going to be okay. She had prepared herself for the worst…ignoring the prospect that he might end up being just fine.

Shit…what was she doing? She knew she was no good for him. What could she give him? She was tainted…God knows she had heard it from her mother enough in the past four years to have to believe it. Bella stopped pacing and stood staring up at the darkening sky. It had been nearly 24 hours since Seattle had been hit by the worst earthquake on record. People were dead and lives were ruined, an entire city and the surrounding area were destroyed. And not once did she think about her mother who lived only 3 hours away. The tremors did damage in Forks for sure, but did she pick up the phone to check on her mother? Nope…not once. God what a shitty person, Bella thought as she reached her hand into her pack and pulled out her phone. Dialing the number she had memorized since she was a child, she was surprised when she heard it ringing.

"Hello?" He mother's voice answered and Bella lost her breath for a moment at the sound. When she repeated the greeting, Bella snapped out of it.

"Mom?"

"Oh…it's you."

**See...he's alive...I would not kill our boy...Update Wednesday!**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Again I failed with my review replies…I read ever single one and they go right to my soul.**

**Do you want to know something amazing? My wonderful beta Melanie (Edward's Eternal) has finally taken the leap and wrote some of her own words down. Please put her on author alert so you can read her sweet and beautiful story when she posts it.**

**Do you want to know something else that is amazing? Dalloway5906's 'Reboot' is up on the poll at The Lemonade Stand. If you have the time and love Nerdward like I do maybe you can go over and vote for her.**

**Who is ready to find out Bella's story? I know I am…**

"What do you want Isabella?" Renee sighed and Bella could almost see her standing in the kitchen leaning against the counter.

"Jake and I are in Seattle working. I wanted to call and make sure you were okay." Bella said quietly, picking at her fingernails. Talking to her mother always made her feel like shit. It was a wonder why she ever bothered called.

"I am as fine as I can be." Renee said dramatically. Bella cringed at that veiled stab at what had happened and tried to keep the words in, but as always, they came flooding out.

"You know I'm sorry Momma. If there was any way I could have prevented it-" Bella whispered, tears pricking her eyes as those memories of four years earlier made her heart heavy.

"Enough!" Renee snarled into the phone and Bella jumped. "I am so tired of hearing your apologies. Four years of words Isabella, and words are not going to bring him back. Nothing you will ever do will bring him back. I just hope one day you will actually know what it felt like for me to lose him." She said before slamming the phone down. Bella held the phone away from her ear and just looked at it, the tears now running freely down her cheek.

"But I lost him too."

**()*()**

"Bella?" Edward rasped, his mind slowly coming back from the medical induced fog he had been under. His side hurt and it felt like someone was attacking his head with a hammer, but he was alive and that was the most important thing. He had been so pissed when he woke up earlier to find that Rose had sent Bella and Jake back into the field. It was not so much that he was upset she was not there with him; he was just worried for her safety.

"Bella?" He said again, feeling his head throb as he tried to look around. He could hear the relentless beeping of the heart monitor and that reassured him he was alive, and annoyed. Where the hell was everyone?

"Edward, take it easy." Rose said and he slowly turned his head towards the window where he found his sister sitting in a chair. She looked like shit.

"Rose…where is Bella?" He asked, pushing his hands down next to his hips to try and lift himself higher in the bed. His vision blurred as pain exploded across his belly. He flopped back down on the pillow as Rose ran over and used a controller to raise the head of the bed.

"You just had major abdominal surgery." She scolded, but he did not let her get away with her avoidance of his question.

"Rose." He growled and she reached behind him to pull his pillow up, ignoring him. He grabbed at her hand as she tried to move away. "Tell me."

"She went outside when they told us you were going to be okay, and she has not come back yet." Rose said, staring down at him. Surprise and then sadness and finally acceptance flitted across his face before he released her and laid his head back down, closing his eyes.

"When can I get the hell out of here?"

**()*()**

Bella knew she needed to get up and go back in to check on Edward, but she just could not get her ass off the bench. Jake sat at her feet as she held her phone in her hands and watched the chaos taking place around her. People were coming and going, ambulances pulling in constantly and through it all, Bella just sat, her mind stuck in the past. She sat there for hours…days passing in front of her. The only time she moved was to go inside to go to the bathroom or get something for Jake to eat. Pain was her constant companion.

When she heard her name being called by that oh so familiar voice, at first she thought it was a memory. But then it got louder and closer and her body tensed as she realized he was really there. Jake jumped up when he felt her alarm, alert for danger, but Bella set her hand on his head as she stood.

There he was…looking much the same as he had four years earlier. His dark blonde hair was still pulled back in a ponytail and his long legs encased in what could have been the same old scruffy jeans. God she hated him. She hated what he did to her and what happened because of it.

"What are you doing here?" She said, trying to keep the venom out of her voice, but was not very successful. His eyes flew wide at her tone and he pointed his thumb over his shoulder. Bella could see a short raven-haired woman standing in the open doorway of a red SUV, busy un-strapping a child from a car seat. Oh right…the baby. She pulled the child from the car and the little girl stood at her mother's side. Bella wanted to hate her, hate them both, but she couldn't. It wasn't their fault.

The woman's eyes widened as she saw who he was talking to and hesitated for a moment, but then straightened her shoulders and grabbed her daughter's hand, swinging their arms between them as they walked. She stopped at his side and looked up at him, her gray eyes questioning.

"Introduce us Jasper."

**()*()**

**Four Years Earlier**

"You sure you want to go Bella?" Charlie asked his only child for the third time. She rolled her eyes in exasperation and nodded her head.

"Yes Daddy. I left Jasper a message on his phone letting him know I was coming. You know Big Red will get me to Seattle. No way would that beast leave me on the side of the road." She joked as she tossed her duffle bag into the bed of her 1954 Fork pick-up, a gift from her father when she turned 16. He had hoped it would be a deterrent to her heading out on the road but instead she fell in love with the clunker, much to his dismay.

"Well, make sure you call us if you get in any trouble and tell Jasper we said hi." Renee chirped as she put her arms around Charlie and blew Bella a kiss. Renee had worried when Jasper went to Seattle for school while Bella stayed in Forks to finish her senior year in high school, but they both assured them that they were in love and nothing, not even distance would keep them apart. But Renee knew that Jasper's phone calls had been coming less and less over the past few months since the spring semester started, and she knew Bella was worried.

Bella waved her hand out the open window of the truck as she pulled out of the driveway. She was so excited to go and see Jasper. He had assured her that she was welcome to visit any time and she really needed to see him. She did not realize how hard it would be to walk through the halls without him at her side. But she was on her way to him now and those three hours could not pass quick enough. He had been distant for a while now, but she knew he must be feeling the same was she was.

Bella pulled into the visitor's parking lot behind Jasper's dorm just as the sky opened up. She had lucked out and not hit any rain on her way up, but of course it would start pouring as she was ready to get out of the truck. She grabbed her messenger bag and used it as an umbrella, slinging her duffle over her shoulder as she made a run for it. Thankfully there was someone coming out as she approached the door so she did not have to wait for Jasper to buzz her in.

Bella sighed in disgust at the out of order sign on the elevator and turned around, trudging up the four flights of stairs till she got to Jasper's floor. Now she was wet from the rain, panting like a dog and she was pretty sure she had forgotten deodorant that morning. But all that went by the wayside as she saw Jasper's door. She set her bag down and smoothed back her hair, tugging at her soaking wet clothes to make herself look a bit more presentable and raised her hand to knock. Ben, Jasper's roommate answered the door and just stared at her.

"Um…Ben. Can you let me come in?" She said, laughing at his dumbstruck expression. He nodded stiffly and she grabbed her bag, setting it on the floor next to Jasper's bunk. She stood; not wanting to get anything wet while Ben closed the door and just stared at her. Bella looked down at herself, expecting her nipples to be poking through her shirt or something with the way he was staring.

"What Ben?" She smiled, but his expression had her laughter stalling in her chest.

"Bella…when was the last time you heard from Jasper?" He asked, running his hand through his dark hair and adjusting his glasses as they slid down his nose. Bella thought for a minute, and realized it had been well over a week since she had heard from him, which was one of the reasons she decided to come up and visit.

"A few days…why?" She asked, her fingers twining together as her nerves attacked her.

"Umm…" Ben stammered, but the door flew open, halting his words.

"Is Whitlock back from the clinic with his baby momma yet?" The newcomer asked, slamming his thick shoulder into Ben's side. Ben stood with his mouth open, his eyes darting from Bella to his friend who had unknowingly just altered the course of Bella's life completely.

"What?" Bella whispered as there was more commotion from the hallway. Bella could hear Jasper's voice clear as day, and he sounded so happy.

"I think he looked more like you baby girl." He said, his voice getting louder as he came closer to the open door.

"What makes you think it is a 'he'? We have a few more weeks till we find out what it is. Will I be Mrs. Whitlock before that happens?" A sweet female voice asked, and Bella felt her eyes start to tear as she heard the girl's words. Jasper and a small dark-haired girl stopped in the open doorway, one arm around her shoulders and the other wrapped protectively across her lower belly, a sonogram picture dangling from his fingers. His eyes widened when he saw her standing in the room, her bag at her feet and water dripping from her clothes.

"Bella?" He whispered and that was all it took to have her scrambling for her things and bolting out the door. She could hear him calling after her, full of excuses.

_I'm sorry_

_I never thought it would happen this fast_

_She's my soul mate_

_Having my baby_

_I love her_

Didn't he realize that with every one of his words her heart broke even more? She threw her bag into the passenger seat and slammed the truck into drive, not even looking as she pulled out onto the busy street and headed back up the 101. She could barely see through her tears and the pouring rain and after she drifted into the opposite lane twice, she pulled to the side of the road, digging through her bag for her phone. Her fingers were clumsy as she dialed the number.

"Hello?" Her father answered.

"Daddy?" Bella cried and Charlie was up and off the couch in a second.

"Where are you baby?" He asked, already shoving his feet into his boots and grabbing his coat.

"On the 101, just past Sequim." She managed to get out between her sobs.

"I'm coming baby, you just sit tight. I'm on my way." He said, trying to sooth his obviously upset little girl.

But he never made it. Ten miles outside Port Angeles, his car hydroplaned on the slick road and careened over an embankment, killing him instantly. Bella called the house after her father still had not arrived and instead of getting her mother, Officer Sam Uley answered the phone and told her as gently as he could what had happened. He sent one of the other officers to go and pick her up, but when she got home, she wished she could have just turned around.

"This is all your fault!" Her mother had screamed as soon as she was in the door. Sam tried to step between them but was not quick enough and Renee's palm landed harshly across Bella's cheek.

"I knew this would happen. He would always just drop everything and come when you called him, and now look what happened. You get in one little fight with Jasper and I lose everything!" She snarled, reaching her hand up to slap Bella again but Sam intercepted her this time.

"No more Renee. Bella lost her father too, don't you forget that." He warned quietly, but the damage was done. Bella moved in with her Grandmother for the rest of her senior year after she came home from her father's funeral to find her things in a pile on the front yard. She made sure she told no one what happened in Jasper's dorm room, and it was only through dumb luck that she saw their birth announcement a few months later.

_Mrs. and Mrs. Jasper Whitlock proudly welcome a little girl, Abby Elizabeth._

**()*()**

So it was no surprise that she left the state to go to college, only coming home to visit her grandmother. When she died a few months after she started with the Rose's team, Bella had no reason to go back to Washington, at least until she met Edward.

But now as she looked at Jasper's little family she wondered if that was enough. She knew what love could do to someone. It could kill them. Her mother and Rose, they weren't living any kind of life anymore since they lost the one person they loved more than anything else in the world. Seeing the way Jasper looked over at his wife, Bella could see that this was that person for him, and although she wished she could go back and change what happened after she left his room, she was happy that he had found her.

"Bella…this is Alice, my wife and our daughter, Abby." Jasper said stiffly and Bella stared at Alice's proffered hand for a moment before reaching forward and clasping it with her own. Bella could tell by the look in Alice's eyes that she remembered who she was, and also remembered how everything came out. Thankfully, their little girl broke the tension when she reached forward to pet Jake.

"Oh, he's friendly." Abby squealed and Bella bent down next to the little girl, smiling at her. She had her father's big blue eyes and her mother's dark hair. She was a beauty.

"His name is Jake and he is my best friend." Bella said quietly as she ran her hand down Jake's flank.

"Bella…I'm really sorry about your dad." Jasper said softly and Bella just shook her head, knowing if he said anymore she would dissolve into a puddle right there. Thankfully it seemed that Jasper understood and stayed silent while Abby played with Jake. Bella looked up at Jasper and his wife and let herself imagine that it was her standing next to him for just a moment. But then she realized that Jasper was not the man she wanted. The man she wanted was up in a hospital bed while she stood out there acting like a scared little girl.

Everything worth having was worth the risk…especially love, she thought as she smiled once more at Jasper and his family and then turned and sprinted towards the hospital, Jake following behind.

**Poor Bella…many of you guessed correctly that it was Charlie that was in an accident…good for you. **

**Bella is heading back inside but it is not going to be all rainbows and sunshine…**

**See you Saturday! **


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: So you all hate me for the little drabble 'Key Party.' I know you do… I would apologize but I'm not sorry.**

**I hope this chapter makes up for it…Edward and Bella will eventually talk…I know you want them to.**

**Melanie has captured me with her Coffeeward so I hope you are reading her 'Simply Coffee' so you can love Coffeeward as well.**

**Dalloway5906 and I will be chatting it up over bottles of wine this weekend and I will do my best to finagle another 'Reboot' chapter out of her.**

**So remember…Bella ended up spending almost 2 days sitting out on that bench before she went back inside…**

"Smile Edward."

He looked around frantically, hearing her voice but unable to see her. His eyes were blinded by the bright sun reflecting off the sand. His hands were clenched tightly into fists as he spun in a circle, his feet sliding on the sand as he searched for Bella.

"Bella? Bella please!" Edward screamed and he was suddenly blown backwards off his feet, pain exploding across his belly and chest. He rolled to his stomach, his eyes tearing in agony. "Oh God…Bella no!" He cried as he turned his face and saw her body lying in the sand, her eyes staring off into nothing.

"Edward."

"Bella…please!"

"Edward."

"Bella…"

Edward opened his eyes slowly, feeling the wetness on his cheeks and raising his hand sluggishly to wipe it off. He looked to his left and saw Rosalie sitting in a chair next to the bed he was lying in. Everything came back to him in a rush and he closed his eyes and wished he could just go back sleep, even if his dreams were torturous. At least there he knew he was dreaming. If he stayed awake he would have to come to the realization that Bella wanted nothing to do with him. He couldn't blame her. He had pushed her away, thinking it was better for them both. But that dream…apparently his subconscious was one step ahead of him.

"Hey Rose." Edward said, his voice rough from lack of use.

"Hey." Rose said, twisting her hands together as she tried not to think about sitting next to his hospital bed four years ago as he clung to life. His injuries back then were so sever, the blood loss was critical and he nearly died. If he was a cat, he would be down to three or four lives by now.

"Where is Mom? Is she okay?" He asked, pushing himself up with a grimace. Rose stood to help him but he waved her off with a snarl. She could not stand to sit back in the chair and wandered over to the window instead, looking out over the destruction that lay below.

"She's fine. Dad has her getting a CAT scan just to make sure. She should be back in a little while." She said quietly. She hated the tension that wrapped around the room like a fog. So much pain.

"Bella…" Rose started but a grunt from the bed had the words dying on her lips.

"Don't Rose…just don't. It was my fault. I thought I could have something I didn't deserve." Edward said with a sigh as he lay his head back on the pillow and closed his eyes. "When will this stop?"

Rose was wondering the same thing.

**()*()**

"Miss, I'm sorry but you can't have that in here." A nurse called as Bella and Jake walked through the halls of the hospital. Bella spun on her heel and glared at the woman.

"That…is a search and rescue dog who managed to find seventeen people under the rubble two days ago. So I think he deserves some respect." Bella snarled as she pulled on Jake's lead and continued down the hall. She hoped that Edward was still in the same room he had been in before she ran like a coward. As she rounded the corner, memories of what happened in his room days earlier halted her feet. Her breath came in pants and she had to crouch down with her back against the wall before her legs gave out on her. She almost lost him…she almost lost him before she even had him. God what was she doing? This was exactly why she did not give her heart to people. If Edward had not made it she would have been just like Rose, a shadow of the person she once was. But was it better to not experience that at all? Was that old adage true…

'_Tis better to have loved and lost than to never to have loved at all_

Bella didn't know…but at this point, she didn't think she had a choice. Somehow that man lying in the hospital bed down the hall had captured her heart and she needed to see where that would lead her.

**()*()**

"Oh thank God! My baby boy is okay." Esme gushed as she flitted around Edward's hospital bed. He had been granted permission to get up and they took the catheter out so he could use the bathroom on his own. He was moving slowly and everything hurt like hell, but nothing more than his heart. Thankfully his mother was too obsessed with worrying over his injuries to notice his state of mind. God damn he missed Bella…he never really had her but he missed her all the same. He wanted her, there was no way he could deny it, but he realized she did them both a favor by leaving. What kind of future did they have? There was no way he could give up his job without feeling like he let down his dead classmates and there was no way they could nurture a relationship with him halfway across the world. And he would never ask her to give up her job; he knew how much she needed to help. It was a good thing she left…but that did not make it hurt any less.

"Oh good, there she is! Bella come here darling girl and let me hug you!" Esme cried and Edward's eyes flew to the open doorway. His mouth dropped open and his eyes widened as he watched her walk into the room, Jake following close behind. Her eyes did not meet his, but he saw the way she glanced over his body, as if making sure he was still in one piece. He ached to hold her, to feel her skin under his fingers.

"Are you okay?" Bella asked Esme quietly as she was pulled into an embrace, allowing some of her panic to subside as she saw that Edward was awake and seemingly unaffected by his brush with death.

"Oh I'm fine, I'm fine. Carlisle sent me for some tests and they all came back normal so I got the all clear. And this boy of mine…did he give us a scare or what? I swear I aged ten years when that monitor flat lined. I thought you were going to faint dead away." Esme chuckled and watched as Bella's face paled and Edward's eyes flew to her.

"You were here?" He asked hoarsely. Bella nodded, her eyes fixed on her feet. Esme looked from Bella to Edward before patting her on the arm and heading for the door.

"Your father is taking me to a hotel to get settled in and then we can go back to the house to see what we can salvage. You two…talk." Esme ordered as she all but ran from the room, giving Jake a pat on the head as she left.

Bella stood awkwardly, her eyes never leaving the floor. Jake had enough of her acting like a child and walked over towards Edward's bed, dragging her behind him. He hopped his front paws onto the bed and laid his head down next to Edward's hand. Edward took the hint and started rubbing Jake's ears, smiling when the dog let out a mighty groan. He looked up and found his eyes locked with Bella's, her face pale with deep shadows under her eyes. God he wanted to hold her.

"You okay?" He whispered and he watched her blink rapidly in an effort to keep her tears at bay but all it did was force one to run down her cheek. The dam broke and she buried her face in her hands and started to sob.

"I thought you were dead. I thought I had lost you and I never even had you." She cried and Edward cursed as he nudged Jake aside and swung his legs over the side of the bed. He reached for her and was thankful she did not fight him as he pulled her into the space between his spread thighs. She gently wrapped her arms around his neck, trying hard not to put too much pressure against his stomach.

"You have me…you've always had me." He whispered as he held her, praying that for once in his miserable life, something would go right.

**Do you think I will make things easy on them? Well then you don't know me very well.**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: Hi everyone…back again with more Lensward and Rescuella. **

**The support for this little fic is just amazing…to have people like KennedyNicoleCullen, Les16, theonlykyla, lvtwiligh09 and Kitty Vuition reading this is just mind blowing. I hope I continue to do you justice with my words.**

**Are you sick of me asking you to do stuff for me yet? No? Good cause I would love it if you would run over to The Lemonade Stand and vote for my drabble 'Key Party' in the weekly poll.**

**tehlemonadestand . blogspot . com**

**Melanie kept me on my toes with this one and saved the day with the next one. She is the chocolate chips in my brownies and her new story 'Simply Coffee' is simply amazing.**

**Dalloway5906 has the sweetest Alice in her story 'Reboot'. Go check her out.**

**Ready for them to leave the hospital?**

"Are you sure you're ready…" Bella asked but was instantly silenced by the glare Edward shot her as they wheeled him out of the hospital. It had been four days since the earth rocked beneath their feet and Bella and Jake had not been out of Edward's sight for more than a few minutes since she came back to him. It was a compulsion now…he _needed_ to know where she was and that she was safe. He was sure it was because she might have to leave without a moments notice and he was saving up the memory of her for when she was gone. It was only a matter of time before she left him…and he could not blame her. His fingers were already itching for his camera and the feel of the sand stinging his skin. Shit…why could he not let that go?

They had broken all the rules when he demanded that she be able to say with him and use the other bed. Bella laughed at him and told him she was fine sleeping on a cot and that there were too many injured people that needed the bed. Carlisle, ever the diplomat, came up with a great compromise and one of the beds from the on-call room was moved into their room. Bella and Jake slept right next to Edward's hospital bed both nights he was there recovering from surgery. She knew they were sliding down a slippery slope, but she was in too deep.

"Here comes Rose." Bella said, reaching for his hand as he pushed himself out of the wheelchair. He was using her hand as a lifeline while he blinked through the bright sunlight and watched his sister pull through the construction and debris like a drag racer, his face splitting into a smile as he saw his baby stop in front of them.

"I thought you said she got damaged?" He asked Bella as he ran his hand over her hood, noticing the slight dent in the right fender and the lack of side mirrors.

"It…" She started to say, but corrected herself when Edward cleared his throat next to her. "SHE, did get damaged but your Dad got her into the shop and…well she will still need some more body work but at least she is drivable now." Bella said shyly, not telling him that it had been her on the phone for two hours begging and pleading the body shop owner to open up and work on Stella. She knew how important the car was to Edward. But he knew…he knew that it had not been his father that had gotten his car fixed but instead it had been the thoughtful and beautiful girl standing next to him. He brought their joined hands up to his mouth and kissed her knuckles. She smiled up at him as she ushered him into the passenger seat and crawled into the backseat with Jake. Edward could not take his eyes off the destruction as they drove through the city. Everything was different…destroyed. But he could see the reemergence of the city he loved as people cleaned up the mess and started to rebuild the damaged buildings and that made him smile.

They pulled into the parking of the hotel his family was staying at and waited until his sister, Bella and Jake had gotten out before struggling to his feet. He was healing well, but it was still hard to get up and down at times. He followed them into the suite they had booked for him and looked longingly at the bed before turning and plopping down onto the couch. Rose stood beside the open door while Bella and Jake did not mess around and crawled up onto the bed without hesitation.

"So I'm just gonna…" Rose said, pointing her thumb over her shoulder as she started to walk out the door. Bella called out to her.

"Wait…we need a ride to the campground." Bella sighed as she pushed herself off the bed and patted her thigh, Jake following after her.

"Wait…where are you going?" Edward asked, suddenly panicked.

"There were no rooms left here so we found a campground and salvaged some tents from your parent's house. Jake and I have had worse accommodations over the years, haven't we boy?" Bella said and Jake ruffed a reply. Edward's chest got tight at the thought of Bella being out of his sight and his mouth opened before his brain could process it.

"Stay here…with me."

Bella, Jake and Rose all looked at Edward like he had three heads. He would have been embarrassed if he was not dreading the thought of Bella leaving.

"Really Edward…it's fine-" Bella started but Edward pushed himself off the couch and stood in front of her, his hands fisted on his hips.

"It's not fine. You saved my life, my mother's life and God knows how many others. I will not have you sleeping on the ground in a fucking tent. Now…get your shit outta the car and let's order some room service." Edward said and turned from them, stalking to the bathroom. He closed the door and sat on the toilet lid, putting his head in his hands. He was having trouble catching his breath as he thought about Bella walking out that door. Anything could happen to her…she could get hit by lightning or be struck by a car or hell…step on a hidden land mine and be blown to kingdom come. Jesus what the hell was happening to him?

**()*()**

"Oookay…well that was weird." Rose said as she came back in from the car and set Bella's bag down on the floor before pulling her in for a hug. She was bunking on the couch in her parent's room and was anxious to head back and check in with the rest of the team. Just because Bella and Jake were not working did not mean that there was no one for Rose to keep track of.

"I guess we will just camp out here." Bella sighed, gesturing towards the couch. Jake wandered over to the closed bathroom door and plopped down in front of it with a huff. Edward had been in there for a while.

"I'll call you if I need you." Rose said as she opened the door and left, knowing in her gut that it was the wrong thing to do, leaving Bella and Edward together. But she and Emmett had looked like a match made in hell on paper too, and her time with him had been the happiest of her life.

"Edward…are you okay?" Bella asked quietly through the closed door, getting a grunt in reply. She sat down on the couch, putting her head in her hands and wondered what was happening to her. She had already realized that she was falling in love with the moody, secretive bastard that was currently occupying the bathroom, but where did that leave her? She knew his job was his life and the same could be said about her. There was no way they could build a relationship around disasters and assignments in a warzone.

Jake jumped off the floor seconds before the bathroom door flew open, slamming against the wall. Edward stalked out, his eyes hard and his body tight. Bella felt her heart thud painfully in her chest and suddenly her panties were damp as she watched him walk towards her, all power and grace. He stopped right in front of where she sat on the couch and looked down at her, his chest rising and falling rapidly as he struggled to find his words.

"I think…" He faltered, shaking his head and clenching his fists tighter.

"I _know_ you have gotten so deep into my soul I can't remember what it feels like to be without you. I _hate _this. It's like…it's like I can feel a part of me missing when you're gone." He admitted, his eyes vibrant as they locked on hers. Bella was speechless. She knew that she had fallen for him, even if she was having trouble accepting it, but to hear that he was feeling the same…

"What are we going to do?" He asked, his eyes never leaving hers.

"You act like this is a death sentence." Bella chuckled, trying not to be offended.

"You don't understand…I'm not…good." He whispered, his eyes closing and his body relaxing as he said the words, as if just getting them out was a victory.

"Of course you are Edward-"

"NO! You don't understand. No one told you…which is why I can understand why you let this go on so long. I…people…p-people are d-d-dead because of me." He stammered, his face going white as a sheet and a fine sheen of sweat bloomed across his forehead.

Bella took a deep breath, closing her eyes as she slowly stood up, forcing Edward to take a step back. She let the devastation and self-loathing and disgust that she usually kept hidden show on her face as she looked up at Edward.

"My father is dead because of me Edward. You want to do this now? Fine…let's throw all our fucked up cards on the table and see who wins. But I can tell you right now…I am holding a royal flush and there ain't no way you are beating me."

**Do you think they might finally talk? I think they might… Or they might just fight and have some great make up sex. Who knows.**

**See you Saturday…or maybe Friday if I place in the poll over at the Lemonade Stand.**

***h00r***

**Yes…yes I am.**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Hi all. I did not come in top 4 over on the poll but I finished a respectable 5****th****. I decided to give you an early chapter anyway since I was just blown away at your support! I can't thank you enough for all your reviews, pimpage and love…**

**Melanie wrote almost this entire chapter since I was just completely stuck. She is amazing! Are you reading 'Simply Coffee'? You should be.**

**Dalloway5906 is rocking her Nerdward hardcore. You are reading 'Reboot' right? **

"Do you think I don't already know about your past Bella? I'm a journalist. The first thing I did after we met was pull up every article I could find about you and Jake. I wanted to be able to see what your life was like, but there was not just information about your life now. I read the articles about your father's death. I _know_ what happened. And I found out from Rose and my mom about the way you were treated because of it. So yes…I think it is way past time for us to throw this shit down." Edward growled, slowly moving towards her, reaching for her hands which were clenched tightly into fists.

"Tell me. You tell me what happened first." She whispered her eyes wide and serious. Edward took a deep breath and nodded before gesturing to the couch behind them. He was tired and he knew reliving his past would only make it worse. She sat next to him, her thigh touching his and her hands gripped tightly in his grasp.

"I went to Iraq my senior year of college…" Edward started speaking and did not stop until it was all out…spread across the room like a black fog. Bella could see him, really see him now. She understood why he did not come home that often and why he refused to take responsibility for people's safety, why he never drove anyone in his car. God what a fucked up pair they were. She was trying to save everyone because she could not save her father and he was trying to live the lives of seven people, making up for their death that hethought he caused.

"Edward…you are not the reason they are dead." Bella said quietly.

"Oh yeah Bella? Well…you are not the reason your father is dead." Edward answered, his hands tightening on hers. They stared at each other, knowing that they were wrong.

"He would never have been out there in the rain, driving so fast if it were not for me."

"Well they would never have been standing there in that Godforsaken place taking pictures if it were not for me. I wanted to stop there. It should have been me who died…not them."

They were at a standstill. Neither one would accept that they were not at fault.

And how the hell could they move forward?

Edward moved before Bella could blink. He grabbed her by the upper arms and pushed her backwards until her spine was pressed against the cushions of the couch. He fisted her shirt in his hands as his mouth descended on hers in a punishing kiss. Jake growled low in his chest as he watched Edward kissing his Bella, but as soon as Bella's hands came up and tangled in Edward's hair, the dog grumbled and lay back down. His mistress was not in trouble and he was exhausted.

"Fuck you Bella…you know it is my fault…my fault they are all dead." Edward panted as he tore his mouth from hers. He reached his hand up and tangled her hair around his fingers, positioning her head so he could kiss her better. She started to speak, fire sparking from her eyes, but his mouth lowered once more, silencing her. They fought for dominance, each furious with the other but desperate to continue.

Suddenly Edward pulled away, his chest heaving with the effort and backed away. Shocked by the sudden move Bella stared at him questioningly.

"Wait what…why did you stop?" She whispered.

"No this is wrong," he murmured. "We can't do this. Not…"

"You don't want me?" She uttered before she could stop the words, interrupting him. Just like everyone else in her life she was not good enough for him. Bella stared at the ground, unable to meet his eyes, suddenly shy and embarrassed.

And just like that, all of his anger and self-loathing drained away leaving him feeling only the need to reassure and comfort her.

"No Bella that is not what I meant," he growled grabbing her face and forcing her to look at him. "I will not take my anger out on you in that way. I will not allow myself to treat you the way others do. I want you. So much. But I want to show you with the same feelings you have brought to life in me. Tenderness…caring…love. Not anger, not bitterness. Not for you. Never for you."

She blinked up at him, wondering how she could make him feel those things. About her? For her?

"I don't want to hurt you Bella… and I am afraid that I will."

"I don't want to hurt you either Edward. I care… too much for that."

The room went silent except for the occasional snore coming from Jake as he slept in the corner.

"What now?" Bella whispered, hating the awkwardness between them that had never existed before.

"Now we talk. Really talk. And I want you to listen to what I have to say. Because I think the next few hours could change everything."

**So they kissed…not make up sex but at least it is something. **

**We will move forward in the next chapter and we will eventually get some citrus action. I know you want it. Hell…that is the main reason I read fic. ;)**


	17. Chapter 17

**Hello my Search and Rescue people! It seems like forever since I have seen you! I hope you enjoy this chapter…things are going to start moving faster for these two…but not as fast as you want.**

**I LOVE you all. Your reviews just make me smile! I am so glad you are enjoying this little ride. We are far from finished and things are bound to get bumpy again before we say good bye to these three…so keep on keeping on.**

**Melanie rocked the hell out of this chapter. She got into Edward's head and mouth and man did she have a great time. There is still time to vote for her over in the Lemonade Stand poll. 'Simply Coffee' is an amazing read and SO deserves to get on top.**

**Dalloway5906 sent me an awesome 'Reboot' chapter. I am super sad that AMC is not going to do the Twilight marathon before the Breaking Dawn release so I will not get my Twi-fix with my girls in November. I will have to go sit by myself and gasp at strangers when he breaks that headboard.**

**Send me some love? My Grandmother is in the hospital and it is not looking good. Any kind thoughts you have send our way...love you!  
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**Ready?**

"You have to let go of the guilt Edward. And there is a way you can start that, start moving forward. You _know_ what you need to do; you just don't want to do it." Bella said as she tossed a pepperoni to Jake who was waiting patiently at the edge of the bed. They had been talking for 14 hours stopping only for bathroom breaks and to eat. Bella had managed to consume an entire bottle of wine by herself as well as a half of a pizza, several blueberry muffins and a big greasy burger and fries. When stressed, her go to method of coping was pigging out. Thankfully she had a metabolism that never let her gain weight, so she was feeling no pain. Edward on the other hand, used to deal with anxiety by smoking, but he had given that up months ago. So instead of puffing on cancer sticks…he was pacing. He was on his 323rd trip around the room, Bella was counting, when she dropped that bomb on him. He spun around and stared at her, sitting on the bed surrounded by the remnants of her fast food feast like she was in the middle of a McDonald's and Pizza Hut graveyard.

"What is that exactly?" He asked, his jaw on the floor. Bella pushed her hair back off her shoulder and nibbled on the crust of her latest victim.

"You need to go to that memorial." She said softly and sat up, preparing for a fight. He did not disappoint as he shook his head and walked towards her, stopping when his knees hit the mattress.

"Are you nuts? Do you really think me going there and flaunting my success while their children are gone is a good idea? Walking around enjoying myself while their children can't?" He snarled, but Bella stood firm.

"Your success…are you really successful Edward? Do you ever enjoy anything? Ever let yourself _feel _anything?" She whispered, waiting a moment for him to speak. When he stayed silent, staring at her, she pushed herself up to kneel on the bed, taking his face in her palms.

"You have a closet full of awards that you can't stand to look at. You ignore the people who love you. You refuse to allow yourself to get close to anyone. You stay away from your own family. You keep trying to get yourself killed to stop the pain. You never allow yourself to stop or be happy. Ever. Do you think those are the makings of a successful person who is enjoying life?" She breathed, watching as his green eyes grew more vibrant through his tears.

"I think it will make you feel better if you see them. I think it would make them feel better. What is the worst that will happen? What are you so afraid of?" She asked and he blinked, releasing those tears down his cheeks.

"They might…they might blame me." He whispered, reaching up and tangling his fingers with hers that were still wrapped around his face.

"You and I both know that no one blames you Edward, except for you. You did not plant that land mine. You just asked them to stop the van so you could take some pictures. No one blames you." Bella said vehemently, pulling him into her arms when he started to sob. She rubbed his back as he broke down, supporting him the best she could, praying that he was _really_ listening.

**()*()**

"Please welcome…award winning photographer and Dartmouth's own…Edward Cullen."

He was petrified. Even with Bella and Jake sitting next to him, his palms were sweating and he felt like his heart might beat right out of his chest. He slowly got to his feet, feeling slightly nauseous as he started up the stairs and onto the dais. He shook the presenter's hand and then stood awkwardly behind the podium, rubbing his palms on his pants. He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out the cards that he and Bella had slaved over; wanting to make sure he had everything written down. As he looked down at the cards the words blurred and he rubbed his fingers over his brow frantically, trying to clear his vision. He set the cards down and grabbed the podium tightly, clearing his throat and praying he would not just break down right here.

Motion at his side caught his eyes and he looked down and right into the softest pair of brown eyes he had ever seen, well second only to Bella's. Jake plopped down right on Edward's feet and he chuckled at the dog, reaching down and scratching him behind his ears. His head lighter and eyes clear he looked back at his cards but left them where they were on the podium and instead looked out at the crowd. He locked eyes with Bella and opened his mouth, speaking right from the heart.

**()*()**

"I wish it had not taken so long for you to come." Sasha Denali whispered in Edward's ear as she hugged him. He relaxed against her because if he had been worried about anyone's reaction, it was Tanya's mother. Before they had left for that fated trip she had pulled him aside and asked him to keep her in line, joking about the dangers of military men. They had both laughed at the time and he told her the military needed to watch out for Tanya and not the other way around. When he flew back in that military helicopter with the remains of his friends, that conversation and broken promise was at the forefront of his mind.

"I'm so sorry." He breathed against her blonde hair and he felt her shake her head.

"Don't you dare. We were blessed that you came back…don't you take on that burden. It was not your fault Edward." She said vehemently, choking up as she pulled away and shook her finger in his face. "Now I want to hear about you making an honest woman of that girl over there soon." Edward was speechless and it must have shown on his face because she laughed.

"I can see the way she looks at you. Don't waste any more time."

**()*()**

Edward sighed as he relaxed on the bed. He was exhausted, both physically and emotionally. It had been a month since the earthquake and thankfully the weather had cooperated enough that Bella and Jake had been able to stay with him throughout his recovery. He was fine now, except for the occasional twinge when he twisted a certain way. He watched as Bella moved around the hotel room. Thanks to Jake's service animal status he was able to stay with them in the room. He was snoring away on the couch.

Sasha's words bounced around in his head as he watched her get ready for sleep. Although they shared a bed, their physical relationship had stalled. He was feeling much better about himself now after he faced his demons and could not shake the feeling that maybe if he pushed Bella towards facing her own past, they might stand a chance.

His eyes were drooping closed when he saw a flash of skin out of the corner of his eye. He slowly turned his head to the side and his mouth dropped open.

Bella was topless.

Topless.

He watched, barely breathing as she tossed her shirt onto a pile of dirty clothes in the corner. He smiled when he saw her shirt sitting on top of his jeans and socks. He must be feeling better if the thought of their comingling laundry made him smile. Edward froze, wondering if she forgot he was in the room or if she thought he was asleep. Why else would she be doing this?

Bella reached down into her bag at her feet for a sleep shirt when she noticed Edward sitting on the bed, staring at her. She stopped, her heart stalling in her chest as she realized she had gotten half naked with him in the room. She was so comfortable with him now, but this must be her subconscious pushing her. She wanted him…God knows she did, but she had wanted to wait for him to get past this hurdle. Now maybe they could start moving forward.

Instead of pulling the shirt on over her nakedness, she turned and faced him fully, smiling when she saw him swallow thickly. His hands rubbed up and down his flannel-clad thighs and his eyes tried to focus on her face, but ended up losing that battle.

But come on, her breasts were _right_ there.

Bella knelt on the edge of the bed, reaching behind her to twist her hair into a knot and lay it over her shoulder. She put both hands on the mattress on either side of his hips and moved up his body, not stopping until she was straddling him. She sat down gently, her bottom resting on his hips and her hands going to his shoulders to balance herself. She bent down and pressed her lips to his throat, lapping at his throbbing pulse. He swallowed again and gently placed his hands on her shoulders, pushing her back. She looked at him, desire written all over her face and it killed him, but he had to stop her. With one little kiss to her lips he looked right in her eyes.

"Your turn."

**Your turn for what? AH Kitkat you are killing me…**

**See…now you just have to copy and past that into your reviews…**


	18. Chapter 18

**We hit 600 reviews with that last chapter and I am ecstatic! I can't thank you enough for all the reviews, pimping and support from all of you. I love these characters and it thrills me that you do too.**

**Melanie came in on top over at the Lemonade Stand poll and my review of 'Simply Coffee' should be up on the blog Monday or Tuesday. I made her cry, so it must have been okay…I just wanted to do her words justice.**

**Dalloway5906 needs to give me my helping of Nerdward and soon…You hear me Dally?**

**So…slight tissue warning for this one…a sad Edward makes me cry every time…**

She knew immediately what he was talking about and Bella jumped up off the bed and stalked towards the bathroom. She was livid.

"Bella…I'm not going to let this go." Edward said as he pushed himself off the mattress and followed after her. She spun around to face him, still nearly naked.

"No. Just because you faced some of your demons does not give you the right to play amateur psychologist. My issues are fine. They are exactly where they need to be…buried deep, never to be heard from again." She exclaimed and Edward just stared. Did she really think she had that pain hidden? It bled into everything she did.

"Bella." He sighed as he reached for her but she stepped backwards into the bathroom. Her face was nearly unrecognizable through the hurt.

"Drop it." She whispered before she closed the door on him.

**()*()**

Edward sat on the bed with Jake lying beside him, both of them staring at the closed bathroom door. Bella had been in there for over an hour. They both jumped when her phone started ringing from inside her duffle bag. Edward knelt down next to the bag, but before he could unzip it the bathroom door banged open and Bella came out wrapped in one of the cheap hotel towels. She pushed him aside and located her phone right before the call went to voicemail.

"Hello?" She barked, keeping her eyes on the floor and not the concerned man who loved her.

"Yep. Yep, okay. Twenty minutes…fine." She said before ending the call and dropping the phone on the bed. Edward sat back on his heels, staring up at her as she started looking through her bag once more. When she pulled out panties, jeans and a sweater he finally spoke.

"Are you going to tell me what's going on?"

She looked over at where he was sitting on the floor and for just a second that damn mask she wore all the time slipped and he saw what she was hiding. But just as quick the walls were back up and she looked away from him.

"That was Rose. Jake and I are needed in Vermont. There was some major flooding and…she needs us." Bella said as she dropped the towel and pulled the panties up her legs. Edward felt like his heart was going to beat out of his chest. The girl he loved was standing in front of him, bare. But this was wrong.

He stood and walked towards the bathroom, but did not make it very far. Bella reached out and grabbed his arm, halting him mid-stride.

"The fuck? Are you just going to walk away?" She demanded, standing there just in her panties.

"That's what you're doing." He said with a sigh.

"Bullshit. You know I need to go."

"Yes Bella…I know. You _need _to go. So go." He answered, his voice monotone. He was tired, so very tired and he was finally coming to the conclusion that as much as he wanted Bella to get past her issues, that might not happen. And he did not know if he had it in him to stay if he was going to have to watch her slowly kill herself.

"What do you want me to do? These people need me, they need Jake. I have to save them." She shouted at his back. His head suddenly felt too heavy to hold up anymore and his chin dropped to his chest. Bella stood with her hands on her hips staring at his back.

"You made me see…see what I was hiding from, what was holding me back. So now I'll ask you. Are you happy? Is this life of traveling and finding bodies time and time again rewarding?" He breathed. He was met with silence.

"Because I don't think it is. I think you deserve more. You did not kill your dad!" He yelled, turning to face her.

"I'm tired of this. Tired of watching you fade away in front of me. I fucking love you but I can't keep doing this." He sighed.

"You…what?" She whispered, stepping closer to him.

"I love you okay? I love you. I can't imagine my life without you. I want to be with you. I want to grow old with you. I want to see you walk down the aisle with Jake beside to you." He laughed, shaking his head. "This was not the way I envisioned telling you this."

"Stop Edward…it's perfect." She sighed as she moved into his arms. She buried her face in his neck, letting his familiar scent sooth her.

"I'll do it." She whispered.

"You'll do what?" He mumbled in her hair.

"I'll face what I need to face." Edward felt his body slump with relief at her words.

Maybe they would be okay.

**()*()**

Edward let the familiar 'click, click whirr' relax him as he held his camera in his hand. It had been too long since he had worked. When Bella asked him to travel with her to Vermont he jumped at the opportunity. Now he was hip deep in the Deerfield River watching as Bella held the blouse of a young woman whose car had disappeared in the rushing water under Jake's nose. He memorized the woman's scent and took off down stream, searching for her. Edward was not holding his breath on this having a happy ending. The water had been rising ever since Hurricane Irene had come ashore. They never predicted it would dump so much water on the state. Five inches had already fallen and more was expected through the day.

Frame…

Shoot…

Edward repeated it over and over as he tried to capture the destruction around him. Last he heard, one of the state's historic covered bridges had been washed away and several others had been damaged. His attention was drawn away from the eroded roads by Jake's enthusiastic barking. He ran towards the sound with the rest of the rescuers. When he got there he stopped short.

Bella was waist deep in muddy water. She was holding Jake's lead with one hand and a radio with the other. Jake was bouncing up and down on the shore but as soon as Bella turned and looked at him he stopped. They had been too late.

Bella pulled herself up out of the water and collapsed next to Jake. He nuzzled his head into her chest and she put her arms around him. Edward watched it all unfold but it was not until he heard the beep that signaled his memory stick was full that he realized he had watched the entire thing through the lens of his camera.

**So…she is going to talk to her mother…**

**Uh oh…**

**There may not be an update on Wednesday unless I get some writing done this weekend…and it is apple picking weekend. So don't hold your breath.**


	19. Chapter 19

**Hi! So everyone is excited to see what happens with Renee? Me too. This chapter would not be half of what it is without Melanie…so Lensward and I thank you.**

**Tissue warning?**

**Bitch warning for sure…**

"I really don't think this is a good idea." Bella whispered into Edward's neck for the third time in as many minutes. They had taken the first flight out of Vermont once the search had been called off. Edward was anxious to get this meeting with Bella's mother behind them because he had an idea he wanted to share with Bella and he wanted them to be as free of their pasts as possible before he spoke to her. He thought he might have found the key to their future.

"This is a great idea. You need to do this. We need to do this. I promise I will be with you every step of the way." Edward let her go with one last kiss to her forehead and they made their way out of the airport and into the rental car. Jake tried to get into the front seat but Bella shoed him into the back, laughing.

"Just…promise me you won't let her get to you." Edward whispered as he drove down the 101 towards Forks. Bella looked out the window, her hands clenched tightly together in her lap.

"I…I don't know what is going to happen when we get there. She is probably going to be awful. Just…please try not to let her words color how you see me." She breathed and Edward jerked the car over to the side of the road.

"Are you kidding me right now? Do you think I would let anything she says make me see you differently? I know you…I know who you _really_ are Bella. There is nothing she could say that would make me look at you any different than I am right now." He said, eyes flashing. Bella swallowed thickly and prayed that his words would still be true after they met with Renee.

*()*()*

Bella took a deep breath and reached up and knocked on the door. Edward stood behind her and Jake beside her, her silent support system. She felt bile rise to her throat as she heard the lock click and the door open.

"Hi Mom," Bella whispered and as Edward watched the hate-filled sneer spread across Renee Swan's haggard face, he wanted to just pull Bella into his arms and run…take her far away from this vicious woman. But he knew that if she did not deal with this now, it would fester like an open wound and their future would be over before it even started.

"Bella…and you brought a friend and the mutt, how nice." Renee said dramatically as she moved aside so they could enter. Edward felt a chill run up his spine as he walked into the living room. This was not a home…this was a shrine. The walls were covered with newspaper clippings, yellowed and faded with age. Pictures were plastered on every available surface and from the resemblance of the eyes and hair; he knew he was looking at pictures of Bella's father.

"Mom?" Bella questions, her voice trembling. Edward turned to her, her face was pale and her hands were shaking. "Mom…what is this?"

"Oh this? I had some of the girls down at the station and over at Peninsula Daily News pull up all of Charlie's pictures and articles from when he was Chief. So many people loved him…" Renee said, trailing off as she ran her hand down one of the pictures that was taped to the wall.

Edward could not help but back away from her as she swiveled her head and looked at him.

"You fucking her?" She asked...point blank. Edward nearly choked on his tongue. Bella gasped and put her hand over her mouth, her eyes wide.

"Um…no Mrs. Swan." Edward said quietly when he was able to find his voice. Renee looked him up and down and then turned to Bella.

"You can do so much better than her anyway." She smiled viscously. Bella closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

"Mom…this needs to stop. I need to be able to put this behind me so I can…" Bella said quietly but was interrupted when Renee kicked at the coffee table.

"Put it behind you? You need to put it behind you? So you can what, have a real life? Oh yes…you deserve a real life. You, who ruined the lives of two people with one phone call." Renee sneered, walking towards Bella. Edward could see her whole body shaking and had enough when one perfect tear slid down Bella's cheek.

"Stop." He growled, stepping to Bella's side as Jake sat down in front of her. Bella buried her face into Edward's side and tried to stifle her tears. Renee just stared at him in shock.

"Enough is enough. I know you lost your husband…but can't you see that you are pushing away your child, the only connection you have to him? You should be sharing your memories of him with her, not making her feel so bad about herself that she is not living a life at all. You are allowing your anger and bitterness to control your life. And you hurt _her _every single time she reaches out. You need to let this go. You need to move on too." Edward said, wrapping Bella up in his arms.

Renee just stared at them. He was right…she knew he was but it was so hard to forget. Her life had gone in the blink of an eye and as much as she wanted to be able to have Bella close to her, every time she looked at her all she saw was her Charlie lying dead in that casket. Edward and Bella looked up when Renee cleared her throat.

"I wish…I wish things could be different between us. I wish I could put it behind me…but I can't. I lost everything when Charlie died and I just can't go on without having someone to blame." She said quietly.

Edward's arms tightened painfully around Bella as he listened to Renee try to defend the reason she treated her only child like shit.

"No." He said as he released Bella and stepped over Jake. He towered over Renee. "You haven't even tried to move on. And your nasty, selfish attitude is keeping Bella from moving on as well. You don't get to blame her. She is NOT to blame here. She did nothing wrong! She called her father when she needed him. You want to blame someone then you blame the wet roads or the shitty tires but you don't blame my girl. She was a child…A CHILD! She needed her father and he dropped everything to come get her because she was the most important thing to him. She is his child…the child you had _together, _does that mean nothing to you? She's _yours _too! I bet he would be devastated to see how you are treating her. From what Bella has told me of Charlie, his family meant everything to him and you have dishonored his memory with your wretched behavior. You should be ashamed of yourself." He snarled, right in her face. Bella was pressed against his back, her arm wrapped around his chest. Jake was sitting on his feet, acting very much like his wingman.

When Renee just stood there, mouth gaping like a fish he continued.

"Now…if you ever want to have a relationship with the woman I love and our family one day, you need to get over yourself and stop blaming her for Charlie's death. Believe me, the loss is yours. This woman is without a doubt the most caring, loving person I have ever met. Even with all the bullshit you have dumped on her. Stop it. Now."

Renee slowly shook her head and closed her eyes, tears falling.

"I'm sorry…I just can't." She whispered.

"Fine. I hope one day you will understand what you are missing out on by not having this amazing woman in your life." Edward said quietly as he pulled Bella around in front of him and walked out of the house. Jake snorted once at Renee before following after them.

Bella managed to make it to the car before she fell apart.

But when the tears stopped she felt better because the whole time she wept…

Edward was right there with her.

**Poor Bella…what a bitch. See you Saturday!**


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N: Hi. Your reviews continue to blow me away. I just…I'm so happy you guys love these three as much as I do. We are heading into a transition for Bella and Edward and I am so excited to where this is going. I hope you will be as well.**

**Melanie continues to crack the whip not only with my chapters but in my real life too. I love her hardcore and am praying that my passport will come in so I can make it to the TwiWeekend up in Toronto in December.**

**Dalloway5906 and I will be hanging at the little man's birthday party this weekend. I hope he likes the Captain America shield and mask I got him…but he is a boy so I'm sure he will.**

**Enjoy this…I did.**

"You sure about this, Cullen?" Marcus Mitchell, Edward's boss at Nation Geographic asked him for the third time. They were sitting in Marcus' fancy office in a New York City high rise.

"I'm positive Marcus. And if you can't accommodate me I'm sure that the AP would be happy to take me on as a freelancer." Edward replied dryly. He was anxious to get back to Bella who was at his apartment packing up some of his shit. He would have just let the landlord toss it all to the curb but she was adamant that they bring his stuff with them back to Kansas City.

After the disastrous visit to Renee, Edward sat Bella down and explained his idea. He had been as nervous as a virgin on prom night as he sat next to her on the hotel bed.

*()*()*

"So…you need to be at disaster sites and I need to take pictures so I thought that maybe I could just go with you to the rescues and just work there instead of going back to Afghanistan. That way we could be together and neither of us would have to stop doing what we love and-" Bella put her hand over Edward's mouth to silence his rambling. She smiled sweetly as he flushed pink and looked away.

"Edward…" Bella whispered but he refused to look at her. She sighed and pulled her hand from his mouth so she could put her fingers under his jaw and turn his head towards her. He pouted as he looked up at her.

"You are the sweetest," she kissed his lips, "kindest," another kiss, "most perfect man alive." She breathed. "And there is nothing I would like more than to be able to keep working _and _be with you."

It seemed like his whole body relaxed as he listened to her words. He reached between her arms and cradled her face in his palms. Bella found she was unable to take a breath as he looked at her; his eyes were full of so much emotion.

"God, I love you." He whispered. Bella blinked rapidly to keep the tears at bay because since her father died, she had not heard those words until Edward said them.

"I love you too." She replied and Edward leaned forward to kiss her. Bella slid her hands up into his hair while his trailed down to wrap around her waist. He had been careful to keep their interactions PG and not the X rated kind his body wanted. He was not sure if she was ready for more…but the way she was grinding against him was a pretty good indication that she might be ready to head into the PG-13 world.

"Bella." He whispered against her lips as his hand snuck beneath the hem of her shirt and up over the smooth skin of her belly. She whimpered against his lips as her fingers tightened in his hair.

"Please." She moaned as his hand got closer to her breast. She gasped as his fingers found her nipples, hard and waiting even through the fabric of her bra.

"Fuck Bella…you feel so good. Perfect." He growled as he pushed her shirt up and jerked the cup of her bra down…exposing her to his hungry eyes. Her head fell back as he slowly lowered his mouth to her bare flesh, taking one aching nipple into his mouth. His cock was pressed painfully hard against the zipper of his jeans but he could have cared less. He wanted to bring her pleasure…to watch her fall apart, calling out his name as she shattered. Just the thought of that alone was enough to have his cock leaking.

"Ahhh…" She cried as his teeth raked over her flesh, his fingers pulling at the other nipple he uncovered. She reached for his pants but he dodged away, he wanted this to be about her.

"Please…Edward." She panted and he buried his face in her neck as he let his hands move to where he desperately wanted them. She trembled as his fingers slid into her panties. They both moaned when he was finally right there, right where she was wet and hot.

"God Bella." He grunted against the soft skin of her throat as he delved deeper, remembering those fumbling make out sessions from high school. It had been so long since he had been wrist deep in a woman, and never a woman he loved. He wanted it to be perfect for her.

"Edward…what-" She gasped as she started to shake in his arms. He lowered them to the bed as her legs parted, never letting his fingers stop their motion. She was breathtaking as she broke apart, her bare breasts held up by the folded cups of her bra, her head thrown back, mouth open as she screamed his name.

And that was all it took to have Edward spilling in his jeans. His belly clenched as he watched her mouth form the shape of his name…as if in exultation. His teeth clamped onto the soft skin of her shoulder as he shuddered against her, holding her tightly.

"I love you." Bella whispered into his hair as she flopped her hands onto his back. He grunted a response and she giggled. He looked up at her and she pushed the hair off his forehead. He smiled shyly as he pulled his hand from inside her pants.

"That was 'I love you' in satisfied man speak." He sighed as he leaned in and kissed her softly.

"That was amazing." She breathed and flushed a beautiful shade of pink that had Edward's spent cock stirring in his now damp jeans.

"Yeah it was. I loved watching you cum." He smirked as he rolled off of her and onto his back. She leaned up on her elbow and put her hand on his chest, looking down at the wet spot on his jeans.

"So that was good for you too?" She laughed as her fingers moved towards the fly of his jeans. He grabbed at them and pulled them up to his mouth, kissing at her fingertips.

"It was perfect." He smiled.

*()*()*

"Bella?" Edward called as he walked into his seldom used Manhattan apartment. It cost an arm and a leg but he did use it when he was in the city. But he was ready to be rid of it. He wanted to find a house in Kansas City with Bella and Jake and just be able to come to a place that felt like home.

He followed the sound of crinkling paper into his bedroom and found Bella up on a ladder wrapping up his Pulitzer and the other useless awards he had won over the years. He came up behind her, putting his finger to his lips when Jake raised his head and started wagging his tail when he saw him. Jake seemed to nod and put his head back down on the bed as Edward moved closer to Bella. He waited until her hands were empty to wrap his arms around her waist and pull her off the ladder. She shrieked and grabbed for him as he turned them around and tossed her on the bed. She hit the mattress with a bounce and Jake jumped off the bed, offended that they had disrupted his nap.

"What are you doing?" Bella said breathlessly as she watched Edward stand at the edge of the bed.

"I was able to persuade my boss into letting me cover the disasters. When do we ship out?" He questioned, cocking his head to the side as he looked down at Bella spread out on his bed. God damn she was gorgeous.

Bella had to bite the inside of her cheek to stifle her smile as she watched his face transform. It was so easy for her to fluster him. All it would take was one roll of her hips or a lick across her lips and he was putty in her hands. It was a powerful feeling, one she had never experienced before. With Jasper they were both so young and inexperienced that the desperate make out sessions and the few times they had sex were awkward and unfulfilling, to the point that the first time Bella had had an orgasm was with Edward. Now she was like a woman possessed. Any chance she got she would tempt and tease him.

"Bella…" Edward warned as he watched her body slide down the bed towards where he stood. "We have to get this place packed if we are going to make our flight home tomorrow."

"That sounds so good." Bella sighed as she reached for him, her fingers hooking in his belt loops.

"What sounds good?" He whispered as he watched her nuzzle her face against the fly of his jeans. He had to hold back a groan as he felt her hot breath through the fabric. She looked up at him, her chin pressed against his hard cock through his jeans and smiled at him.

"You said home."

**Shall I fade to black? **

**I am thinking no Wednesday update…maybe…but probably not.**


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N: Surprise…I managed to get another chapter finished so you get this today. I can't thank you enough for all your support…knowing you are waiting for this made me write faster.**

**Melanie has been sending me some amazing things…I can't wait for more girl. She fixed my lack of commas in this chapter…seriously…what is with my hatred of commas?**

**Dalloway5906 and I had fun at her son's birthday party…not as much fun as we would have had we not been surrounded by 6 little kids, but fun none the less.**

**So…a long time ago, Kitty Vuitton and I had a discussion about a plotline. And with her help I changed some things around. FINALLY we are getting to that particular section. Hope you like it Kitty…**

**Enjoy this citrusy little taste…and no…I will NEVER fade to black…**

"I did say home. That's what we are going to make…a home." Edward whispered. His eyes rolled back in his head as Bella's fingers moved towards the button of his pants.

"I want to take these off." She breathed as she pushed the button through the hole and then slid the zipper down.

"Oh yeah…and then what do you want to do?" He groaned as she pushed the pants down his hips and then shoved him back so he was lying on the bed.

"Then I want to take your cock in my mouth and suck it." She whispered and Edward's head flew up off the pillow to look at her, his eyes wide.

"What?"

"You heard me. I'm tired of waiting for you. I want you. I want your cock in my mouth. Now." She said with a shy smile as her fingers slid through the flap of his boxer briefs and pulled him out.

"Oh sweet baby…" He sighed as her hand slid up and down his shaft. Bella was mesmerized as she watched the skin slide up and down his cock. Jasper's had been the only other cock she'd seen and he had been circumcised so she was flying blind here.

"Show me what you like." She pleaded and moaned when his hand came up to cover hers.

"Like this." He grunted as he moved their joined hands up and down. He let go and could only watch as her little hand stroked him. When she bent her head down and lapped at the tip, he had to grit his teeth to keep from coming right there.

"Yeah, lick it baby. Oh God…so good." He groaned as she slid him into her mouth, her hand still moving over his cock.

"Hmmm." She hummed as his hands came down and tangled in her hair.

"Oh baby…you keep doing that and I'm gonna cum." He sighed as he closed his eyes and just concentrated on what she was doing. When he felt something nudge his thigh he opened his eyes and looked down…and nearly had a heart attack.

"Jake! Jesus Christ what the fuck are you doing?" He screamed and Bella pulled off of him with a pop and looked to her side to see Jake sitting there, watching the whole thing. He looked up at Bella with such a confused expression, wondering what he had done wrong, that she dissolved into giggles. They only got louder when she glanced over to see Edward still lying on the bed with his half-hard cock sticking through the slit in his boxer briefs.

"Not funny." He grumped as he tucked himself back in and pulled his pants up. He turned and glared at Jake. "Cockblocker."

"Oh poor baby." Bella soothed and Edward snorted at her as he got to his feet and extended his hand to her.

"Yeah, make fun all you want." He chuckled as he yanked her to standing. She smiled up at him.

"I was talking about Jake." She laughed and darted into the living room to finish packing.

"Gotta go or we'll never get all this done before our flight tomorrow!" She called over her shoulder and Edward looked down at Jake.

"I'll get you back for this." He growled and Jake slunk down on his belly with a sigh.

*()*()*

"So then she tells him that if he doesn't find a way to transport the entire crew to New Mexico she will make sure he never uses his cock again - True story." Bella laughed as they sat around the table of a bar in the heart of Kansas City. She and Edward were all settled into her apartment and they were having a relaxing night with Rose and some of her friends before she started back at the training center the next day. Edward was going out to find some space to rent to use as a studio until they could find a house they loved. Her apartment was just too small for him to work in.

"Well you would have too…oh wait, sorry, this number keeps calling." Rose said as she stood up from the table and walked outside to answer her phone. This same number had been appearing on her caller ID for the last two weeks but there was never any answer and she was getting sick of it.

"Hello?" She yelled into the phone, pressing her hand over her ear to hear over the din of the crowd.

"Hello. Who is this?" A deep male voice questioned and Rose was instantly on alert.

"Well, you called me fuckface so how about you tell me who you're looking for." She snapped.

"I…I don't…I'm not sure…" He stammered before the line went dead.

Rose pulled the phone away from her ear and looked at the dark screen for a moment. Her palms were sweaty and her heart was racing but she had no idea why. She shoved the phone back into her pocket and went back to join her friends, hoping that maybe a few more shots would keep the nightmares at bay later.

*()*()*

"That was fun." Bella sighed as she flopped down on the bed, her head comfortably fuzzy. She felt a tugging at her feet and looked up to see Edward pulling off her knee high boots. "Thanks."

"I don't know how you girls wear shoes like this. They just look _painful_." He chuckled as he tossed them into her closet.

"The things we do for beauty." She giggled as she pulled her knees up to her chest and rolled over onto her side. When the bed dipped she nuzzled her body back into Edward's as he spooned behind her.

"That was fun tonight." He whispered against the skin of her shoulder. She hummed and nodded, too blissed out to even open her eyes. She moaned as Edward's fingers threaded through her hair and massaged her scalp. "Oh, that feels so damn good."

"You like that baby?" Edward whispered into her ear, his hips grinding against her ass as she started to undulate beneath his ministrations.

"Edward." She sighed as she arched her head back, exposing her throat for his ravenous lips.

"Bella?" Edward groaned.

"Yes. I want this…please?" Bella sighed and Edward's breath halted as she turned in his arms and looked up at him, so damn trusting.

"Yes. Fuck yes." He breathed as she reached for him.

**Woo hoo! So…I can't wait to hear your thoughts.**

**So yes…lemon coming next chapter.**


	22. Chapter 22

**Who wants an entire lemon chapter? **

**You do?**

**Okay…**

**Am I going to tell you if you were right or not with Rose's mystery caller?**

**No…I'm not.**

**And we won't hear from him again until next chapter…**

**I held off posting because I'm an addict. I'm addicted to Melanie. Work is KILLING her right now and she is also sick as a dog…but after working like 100 hours, she beta'd this. I lubs her hard core…**

Bella's eyes filled with tears as Edward rolled her over onto her back and held her face in his palms.

"I love you so much." He whispered before he pressed his lips to hers. She sighed into his mouth, reeling as she felt the kiss in every inch of her body. Her breasts ached and she rubbed her thighs together, searching for some friction. When his hands went to the hem of her dress she lifted her arms and arched her back so he could pull it off. Edward sat back, his legs straddling Bella's thighs and just looked at her.

The little bit of alcohol that was still running through her system just made everything feel floaty and relaxed. Her cheeks were flushed and her body undulated beneath him. She was perfection in black lace.

"You're wearing too many clothes." She breathed as she reached for the buttons of his dress shirt, only to have her hands batted away when she struggled to push the little disks through the holes. Edward laughed at her pout as he quickly got the shirt undone and tossed it in the corner. His undershirt followed and Bella wasted no time, letting her fingers move across his flesh. His skin was smooth and firm and she wanted to feel it pressed against hers. She caught him off-guard when she jerked her knee up and pushed him towards her. He managed to put his arms out to catch himself before he fell flat on top of her.

"Bella…what?" He mumbled as she attacked his mouth. Her hands pushed at the waist of his jeans and they slid down over his ass. Her nails pressed into his back as she nipped at his lips.

"Oh more…please I want more." She sighed as he pressed his thigh between her legs. He pulled the strap of her bra down and the cup slid over her nipple, exposing it to him for the first time. He licked his lips as he met her eyes, and then lowered his mouth to take her in.

"Yes." She cried out as his teeth scraped over the sensitive skin of her breast. Nothing had ever been as good as this _right_ now. His hands reached beneath her and then her bra was gone, lost with the other clothes that were strewn on the floor. Bella's legs wrapped around his waist when he tried to pull back to look at her. Edward lowered his mouth to her collarbone and closed his eyes, but not before seeing a familiar set of brown eyes staring up at him. He jumped back and leapt off the bed. Bella sat up in shock.

"Edward?" She called, wondering what she had done wrong.

"No way…not again…get OUT!" Edward yelled as he stormed from the room. It was then that Bella looked down at the floor next to the bed and saw Jake laying there, his head on the mattress. She put her hand over her mouth to stifle her giggles as Edward walked back into the room with a dog treat in his hand.

"Jake…get out!" Edward said as he waved the treat at him. Jake sniffed the air but found it unappealing and jumped up on the bed next to Bella instead. She could not contain the laughter this time as Edward put his hands on his hips, looking so sexy with his jeans riding low and stared at the dog.

"GET OUT!" He snarled and Jake's hackles went up and he growled right back. Bella knew if she wanted the stand-off to end she would need to intervene. She patted Jake on the head and he turned to look at her.

"Go." She whispered and although he looked pretty sad about it, he jumped down off the bed and walked right past Edward and out the door. Edward looked at Bella who was sitting looking smug with her back against the headboard. He tossed the treat into the living room and closed the door. He took his time walking back to Bella. He wanted to burn the way she looked into his brain. She was breathtaking.

"I love you." He sighed as he stood next to the bed. She smiled and reached for him. He paused to push his jeans down his legs and then joined her on the bed. He grabbed under her thighs and yanked her down the bed, making her laugh. He smirked down at her as he pushed her hair off her forehead. It didn't take long for him to have her panting and wild in his arms again and when he reached for her panties she lifted her hips. The scrap of lace was tossed to the ground and Edward felt his mouth go dry. Bella felt no shyness as she let her legs fall open and put her arms around his neck. Their lips met again and when he felt her hands shove his boxer briefs off, he let her. This was right…this was so right.

He pushed forward and slid through her wet folds, groaning when he felt his balls get tighter.

Shit, this was not going to last long. Bella was writhing beneath him and he paused.

"Bella…are you protected?" He whispered against her neck and whimpered when she froze. He lifted his head and looked down at her. "I don't have anything."

Bella closed her eyes and bit her lip to keep from screaming. Were they really going to have to stop? They waited so long and now…

"Wait!" Bella yelled as she pushed Edward off of her and ran into the bathroom. She came back smiling with a box of condoms in her hand. "I love your sister."

"Can we _not_ talk about my sister while I'm trying to make love to you?" Edward sighed as he took the condoms from her, and suited up. He pulled her back under him and ran his nose up her throat, stopping when he got to her lips. He held their faces inches apart as he slowly pressed inside of her. Bella's back arched as she instinctively tried to get away from the intrusion. It had been so long for her and he was bigger than Jasper had been. They were both breathing hard by the time Edward was all the way inside of her. With his hands cradling her head, Edward stopped moving and just looked at Bella.

"This is the first day of forever for us." He whispered as he leaned down to kiss her tears away. When he pulled his hips back, Bella's nails sunk into his shoulders, heightening his pleasure. Back and forth he moved, learning the things she liked and the things that she loved. He wanted to last, he really did but it had been so long and she felt so good. He pressed his thumb against her, praying that by some miracle she might be able to cum. When her body trembled and she threw her head back, calling his name he thanked God and then let himself go.

He pulled away from her and took care of the condom before reaching for her again. With her head tucked under his chin and her leg thrown over his he thought he could have stayed like that forever.

And right now, forever didn't seem long enough.

**So…their first time…**

**See you Wednesday with possibly my favorite chapter so far… **

**Want to read something CRAZY? Go check out 'I'm a Doctor' by texasbella…cause…HOLY SHIT!**


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: So we are getting so damn close to that 1000 review mark and I am so excited. I put so much into this story…searching for actual weather events and locations to try and make this feel as real as possible. So yes…there was recently a tornado in Florida and it did do some damage to homes and buildings.**

**Melanie managed to beta this after working 10 hours AND working on her new story 'Awaken' which should start posting today. I LOVE it…I can't tell you how excited I am that she will be sharing it all with you so please put her on alert if you don't already have her…Edward's Eternal.**

**Dalloway5906 needs some cyberlove today as her little man is in having some surgery. "Reboot" updated yesterday and things are gonna start moving now…**

**Hold on and don't hate me too much…**

Two phones rang simultaneously and the owners of said phones grumbled as they rolled over to answer them.

"Swan."

"Cullen."

The messages relayed were exactly the same.

"Florida…tornado…now."

Bella and Edward got up from the bed; the sheets rumpled from their night of passion and grabbed their bags. Jake was already on alert and ready to go. Coffee was made and travel mugs were filled, all with the efficiency that spoke of numerous mornings together. They both thought it was amazing that this was the first time they had done this.

Loaded in Bella's Jeep, Jake went back to sleep sprawled out across the cargo space. Their nerves were on overdrive on the trip to the airfield. Rose had arranged for a transport and Edward was tagging along. His hands opened and closed on the case of his camera, more than ready to start working. Bella's hands were tight on the steering wheel as she started thinking about the upcoming search. Edward had seen her working before, during the Vermont floods, but tornadoes were different.

*()*()*

"So Cullen, you with Swan or are you up for grabs?" Emily said as she wrapped one hand around his upper arm. Only now used to being touched again by Bella, Edward pushed her away with an uncomfortable frown.

"Emily…hands off." Bella sighed as she and Jake walked over to where they were standing in front of the Humvees waiting to head out. Jake plopped down right on Edward's feet and growled low in his chest, a warning to Emily that he was _his. _Edward hid his smile under a well placed hand as Emily gaped at the dog and then turned with a huff and walked off.

"Slut." Bella said under her breath and Edward laughed as he pulled her into his arms.

"I'm yours; you know that and now so does she." He whispered into her hair as he held her tight. He could feel the tension in her body and knew that only part of it was due to Emily.

"Come on…they're waiting." Bella sighed as she pulled away. Edward could almost see the walls go up as she prepared for what she might find out there.

*()*()*

Edward sat with his back against the closed bathroom door and his head in his hands. It had been bad. It had been so very bad. The tornado had come through the small town of Indiantown at 9:30 at night. While that was good news for the unoccupied schools that were damaged, it was devastating for the people that had rented out the local VFW hall to celebrate a birthday. The twister tore the roof right off the building Bella and Jake had found only five survivors out of the 45 that had been at the party. Jake had his head resting on Edward's bare foot and he reached down and rubbed the dog behind his ears as he listened to Bella's stifled sobs inside the hotel bathroom.

He had tried to get her to stay with him while she let it out, but she refused. She had pushed him away when she started to cry and slammed the door shut, locking him out. When was she going to learn that she needed to let him in?

*()*()*

"Sure Marcus, just give me a minute to call my crew and then I'll follow you to your hotel. You _know _I'll find a way to thank you for getting us on that transport tomorrow." Rose cooed as she ran her blood-red nail down the Marine pilot's chest. He smirked at her as he pressed a piece of paper into her hand. She knew without even looking that it was his hotel room number. Blowing him a kiss, she walked out of the bar and outside into the balmy night. She leaned up against the wall and tipped her head back. The sky was clear and the stars were bright. She felt the tears on her cheek and raised her hand up to brush them away. Useless things…tears. They didn't make her feel any better and only served to remind people of what she was really feeling on the inside. She might have been able to put on a convincing show to the outside world, but in her heart, she was dying.

She closed her eyes when she felt her phone vibrate in her pocket. Pulling it out she sighed as she saw the now achingly familiar number displayed there. She pushed accept and held the phone up to her ear without saying anything. The deep breathing on the other end alerted her that he was there, as he always was. She didn't even bother saying anything now; she just waited for him to speak.

"Hello?" He asked, and Rose's heart clenched. Why was this voice so familiar?

"Yes." She whispered, unable to speak louder past the lump in her throat.

"I have…I keep having dreams about this phone number. And about a woman…" He trailed off and Rose bit her lip to keep from screaming. What was going on?

"Do you…do you know me?" He asked and Rose shook her head before she realized he could not see her.

"I don't," she rasped and then cleared her throat and spoke again. "I don't even know who you are."

"I'm…" He hesitated and Rose found herself unable to breathe until he finished that thought.

"I'm John."

Rose pushed end on the phone and shoved it back in her pocket. She bent over and fisted her hands in her hair. She wanted to yell and cry and shout. What was she expecting? Of course it wasn't Emmett, he was dead. But that voice…

When her phone started ringing again it took all of her strength not to just toss the fucker into the wind. But then she wouldn't be unable to reach her team, so instead she took a deep breath and pressed accept again.

"Please…" He said and she wanted to cry.

"I'm sorry, I don't know anyone named John. I think you might have the wrong number." She sighed and hung up before he could say anything else.

She turned her phone on mute and walked towards the hotel. As she pulled out the paper with Marcus' room number on it she wondered how she would be able to have sex with him without crying.

*()*()*

"Bella? Bella, I'm coming in." Edward called through the bathroom door and when he got no reply he took a step back and then rammed his shoulder through the door. He had given her an hour, but he was done letting her suffer through this by herself. He stumbled into the little bathroom when the door gave way and Bella sat up in the tub, water sloshing all over the tile floor. She glared at Edward and then at Jake when he popped his head through the doorway.

"What part of 'I need some time' did you not understand?" She growled, but it would have been more menacing if her eyes were not red rimmed and swollen. Edward ignored her glare and walked over to the side of the tub and reached for her. She struggled when he tried to pull her out of the tub and he ended up soaking wet as she splashed water on him.

"Stop it –" He reprimanded when she tried to push him away. After he succeeded in getting her out of the water and onto his lap as he sat on the floor, she went limp in his arms. He yanked a towel off the bar on the wall and wrapped her up. She was shivering and crying and just…gone.

"Bella." He whispered and when she did not respond he grabbed her chin gently and tipped her face up to his. Her eyes were closed but her pain was evident.

"Bella." He breathed as she opened her eyes and looked at him.

"Five, Edward. We managed to find five people." She said, her voice emotionless. He pulled her closer and ran his fingers through her wet hair.

"Bella…those five people are here because of you and Jake. I know it was hard…I saw how hard it was for you but you need to try and think of the good…" He cooed but she was beyond soothing. She pushed him away and stood up, the towel dropping to the floor.

"Stop!" She screamed as she pulled at her hair. Edward sat back against the wall, his eyes wide at her outburst.

"I can't…how can I keep doing this? I want to help, I _need _to help but it's killing me. Every time I find another body it just reminds me of him. How do I keep from just breaking apart?" She whimpered as her legs gave out and she collapsed to the floor.

Edward was there in a second to scoop her up and he carried her back into the bedroom.

"I've got you. I'll hold you together Bella." He whispered as he cradled her against him while she cried.

**A/N: Sad face for Rose. I know a few of you wished that I had left Emmett in the wind…sorry.**

**See you some time this weekend…**


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N: Love…love…love you all! And your patience with the delay in posing this chapter. **

**Melanie was supposed to be rocking out at a martini party this weekend but got a migraine instead and then had to beta this through the pain. Love her. "Awaken" updates tomorrow. **

**Dalloway5906 updated 'Reboot' yesterday and the chapter KILLED me! Go read it…**

**Warning…there are triggers ahead. Not graphic but they are there…**

Bella woke up to the soothing sensation of fingers stroking through her hair. Her eyes were gritty and dry from crying the night before and her body ached but her heart was full as she realized that Edward had stayed with her through everything. Through the screaming and yelling and her tears and snot he stayed right next to her. Even when Jake deserted her to check out the birds outside the window, Edward was there.

"Bella." She looked up at him, expecting to see his green eyes but instead she found him sound asleep, his hand moving through her tangled curls unconsciously. She pulled her head from his lap and lay down next to him on the pillow. He looked terrible. There were dark smudges under his eyes and his hair was wild. She knew it was all her fault. Just as she raised her hand to brush the hair off his forehead his face crumpled and his mouth opened with a whimper. Bella watched, mesmerized as his every emotion played out across his face. She jumped when he took a stuttering breath and then screamed her name.

Edward's eyes opened and he turned his head, searching for Bella. His dream had been so real, so heartbreakingly real. She had been right there, in his grasp, but then she just…disappeared. It had been so much worse than his usual dream; he had been ready to save her when she was just gone. When he turned his head and caught sight of her, all the breath left his lungs in a rush and he lunged for her, pulling her into his arms. He buried his nose in her hair as his hands opened and closed on her back convulsively.

"I'm here." Bella soothed as she ran her nails through his hair. She could feel his heart thundering in his chest and pushed her own emotions to the side so she could care for him. He deserved it after all he had done the night before.

"Bella…" he choked out and sat back and held her face in his hands. He just stared at her, memorizing the face that had quickly become the center of his universe.

"Edward, it was just a_ dream_." Bella whispered but he shook his head.

"No, it was real." He breathed and his phone rang, interrupting Bella's rebuttal. With a groan, he released her and leaned over to grab it. He hit accept when he saw his sister's number on the screen.

"Rose?"

"I need you to come pick me up." She rasped through the phone and Edward stood up quickly and reached for his jeans. Rose never asked for help so it must have been important.

"Where?" He asked as he stuffed his feet in the pants and grabbed a shirt. Bella watched him get dressed and gave him a questioning look. He mouthed Rose's name and Bella looked as confused as he felt as to why she was calling.

"At the Seminole Inn. I'll be out front." She said before the line went dead. Edward held the phone out and stared at the dark screen. What the hell?

"Come with me?" He asked as he threw his shirt on over his head. Bella watched his muscles flexed as he stretched and her mouth watered at the memory of how he felt pressed against her. They had such a short time to bask in their physical connection before life got in the way. And then between her breakdown the night before and his nightmare that morning, they had no time to reconnect. Now Rose's call disrupted things again.

"Of course." She said as she shook off her less than appropriate thoughts and quickly got dressed, following him out to their rental car. Jake did a quick leg lift against a mailbox and jumped in the back seat, always eager for a ride in the car. They drove in silence, each of them replaying their pain from the night before. When they pulled up in front of the hotel, Bella's jaw dropped. She had never seen Rose looking anything less than perfect, but she had now. Rose's blonde hair was pulled back in a ratty ponytail, her jeans were wrinkled and her red button down shirt had some buttons missing. Her makeup was streaked down her cheeks as if she had been crying and there was a pretty nasty bruise on her cheek.

Edward threw the car into park and jumped out, pulling Rose into his arms. She resisted for a moment, but eventually gave in and buried her face in his chest as she started to cry. Bella joined them and she tucked a wild strand of Rose's hair behind her ear. After Rose settled down, she pulled away with a sheepish smile.

"I'm sorry." She rasped and Bella was quick to reassure her.

"Rose, you would do anything for us and you know we would do the same. Now let's get you back to our hotel." Bella said as she steered her into the back seat with her while Jake hopped up in the front with Edward, more than happy to act as co-pilot. While Edward concentrated on the road Bella tried to coax details out of Rose. Through a whispered conversation, Bella learned everything…and she was dreading having to tell Edward what was going on. But when they pulled into the valet and Rose asked Bella to explain to Edward why she desperately wanted to just go to her room and take a shower, Bella relented and with a lingering hug for each of them, Rose disappeared into the hotel.

Bella reached for Edward's hand and with Jake following close behind they walked over to a small clearing next to the hotel. Bella could feel Edward's nerves and she wished she could do something to soothe him, but until he knew everything, she knew it would continue.

"Edward…" She started but fumbled her words. He sat down on the damp grass and pulled her down into his lap as Jake settled down next to them.

"Just tell me." He sighed and Bella closed her eyes and started rambling.

"Rose has been having sex with people to get things done for the crew and last night she went home with the wrong guy. He hit her and he tried to um…you know…rape her but she stopped him and beat the shit out of him."

Silence.

Bella looked up at Edward and was shocked when she saw the absolute rage on his face. He pushed her off his lap and started towards the car, his hands clenched into fists. Bella ran off after him, standing in front of him with her hands against his chest.

"Edward…stop! She took care of him. She said he was barely recognizable after she got finished with him. She just…she wanted us to know." Bella said, and relaxed slightly when he looked down at her. He stopped walking but his body still vibrated with barely contained rage.

"What the hell was she _thinking?_" Edward growled, but the pain in his eyes took the edge off his words. Bella reached her hand up and pulled his head down to her shoulder.

"She lost the most important person in her life Edward…how would you feel? How would you deal with that kind of loss? She has thrown herself into her job but that can only distract her for so long. I saw the way she was with men and even some women in the past, but what was I supposed to say? 'Don't treat yourself that way?' It was her decision and even if it was the wrong thing, for a while it worked to keep her pain at bay. But something is different now. The sex and the job aren't keeping the hurt away anymore. I'm worried about her." Bella whispered and relaxed completely when Edward brought his arms up and wrapped them around her waist.

"I just…she was not the only one who lost him, you know? I lost him too. They dated forever and when they got married, it actually gave me some hope that maybe someday I could find someone that was perfect for me like Emmett was for Rose. Then the explosion happened…and well you know the rest. But now that I have that you, I know the kind of pain she must be going through. Cause if I lost you…" He stopped, unable to even say the words. Bella's hands tightened in his hair because she knew exactly what he was talking about. She felt the same way.

"We just need to try and support her the best we can. And right now she wants us to know but not talk about it." Bella whispered and he nodded against her shoulder. She pulled away and looked at him as he wiped at the tears off his cheek. He loved his big sister so much, and it killed him that she was going through this all alone. If she would only reach out…

But no, Rose was strong and would not ask for anything which was why her behavior today had been so out of character for her. He just hoped they could get back the old Rose, before she was gone forever.

**A/N: Poor Rose…**

**See you Wednesday!**


	25. Chapter 25

**A/N: Hello to all of you…we are heading into some different things for this story…new plots I had no idea were coming…I hope you enjoy!**

**We will be moving to ONCE a week updates for a little while. My girl Melanie is just being beat to death at work and I worry about her. So to lessen her load a little bit I will be doing updates on Wednesday only for the next three weeks. Then we will be back to twice or even three times weekly updates right around Thanksgiving. I hope you understand, but Melanie comes first…**

**Big, giant, squishy hugs to Dalloway5906. She knows why…**

**And to you…my loyal readers and the new ones who seem to join us every week…words cannot express my love for you. **

"Edward…I need you, Bella and Jake at the airport in an hour. We gotta move on this one." Rose barked as soon as Edward answered the phone. They had just fallen asleep an hour earlier after they had stayed up most of the night talking about Rose. Now they were needed in Turkey after a massive 7.2 magnitude quake hit one of the poorest sections of the country near the city of Van. They were scheduled to fly out as soon as the team could get to the airport. Thankfully they were still in Florida and that would take some time off their flight.

Edward rolled over and nudged Bella awake, hating when she looked at him with her bleary and tired eyes. He just hoped they could get some sleep on the plane.

"It is always like this…this busy?" He asked as he placed a quick call down to the desk to have some coffee waiting for them at the counter. Bella yawned behind her hand as she tossed her toiletries in her bag.

"We're at the mercy of the weather. Sometimes we can go weeks without a call and then sometimes it's back to back like this."

Edward laughed when Bella had to pull Jake out of the bed and nudge him with her foot to get him to move. When they stopped at the desk to get their coffee and check out, he plopped down on the ground and curled up, snoring only seconds after his head hit the hard tile.

"Jake…gotta go to work." Bella sighed as she bent down to run her fingers through his fur. He grumbled but got up and followed them out to the rental car. The airport was crazy that early in the morning and it took forever for them to get through security. When they were finally settled into their seats, Edward pulled Bella's hand up to his mouth and pressed his lips against her palm.

"I love you." He spoke the words against her skin and she sighed as she felt that love infiltrate her soul.

"I love you." She whispered back as she pulled her hand away and pressed her lips to his. He sat back in his seat and tucked her against him, closing his eyes. They were together, even if they were heading into hell, at least they were together.

*()*()*

"I have one team leaving for Ercis and one for Özlap. Split up and get on those transports!" Rose shouted, trying to be heard over the chaos. The command center was a madhouse as the organizers tried to keep track of the military and volunteer rescue teams. So far there were reports of possibly 1000 still missing with the death toll standing at 270. Hospitals were damaged which meant people were being treated in tents with amputations happening in the streets. Edward had never seen anything like it. His camera was glued to his face as they made their way through the country on their way to Ercis. The buildings were so poorly constructed that it was a miracle that anyone survived if they were inside when the quake hit.

Jake had his vest on and when Bella sent him to task, he took off immediately towards what was once a school. Edward stayed back as Bella and a recovery team followed after the dog and after a minute he could hear Jake's high pitched bark signaling he had found something. His heart was in his throat as he waited to hear if it was a body or a survivor. When Bella came stumbling out from the rubble with a dirty, crying little girl in her arms, he dropped the camera, thankful he had the strap around his neck, and he put his arms out for the child. Bella handed her over with a blinding smile and turned back towards the destruction. There were more survivors to save…thank God.

*()*()*

"Rose…ROSE!" Someone shouted to be heard over the competing voices and Rose turned from the map and radio to look for whoever had called for her. She saw Caius White, a fellow team leader and waved him over. They had worked together several times over the last 6 years and had forged a friendship of sorts. They usually got together for drinks after a rescue to unwind, being that they both had the same kinds of skeletons hiding in their closets. For Caius, it was the loss of his wife and child in the 9/11 terrorist attacks that got him into their vocation. You could see the shadows in his eyes and Rose liked hanging out with him because there was no reason to put up a front. He knew exactly what she was going through.

"Where's your team?" He asked as he slung his arm over her shoulder. She pointed down to the map and he nodded. "Tough area. Have they found any survivors?" 

"Yeah, my one pair got ten kids out of a religious school." She said as she reached her hand up and tightened her pony tail. She had done a passable job with makeup, trying to cover the bruise, but when her arm brushed against her cheek she winced, and Caius saw it.

"You walk into a door?" He asked as he brushed his knuckles over her cheek. She grimaced and a smart man would have left it alone. Too bad Caius wasn't very smart. "No really Rose, what happened?"

"Drop it." She growled low under her breath, pushing away from the table. Caius reached his hand out and grabbed her arm, stopping her.

"You need to let someone help you." He whispered in her ear and he tightened his grip when she tried to pull away.

"Let me go." She breathed, feeling her tightly wrapped emotions start to unravel.

"No. You are falling apart…you can barely do your job. You _need _to deal with this." She turned and looked at him, her eyes wet.

"Like you are? Did you even go to the anniversary ceremonies? Can you go back to the city yet? 'Cause you don't seem to be doing a very good job of 'dealing' with your own shit." She snarled.

"I'm getting married." He said, and he watched as the color drained from her face. "Next year. I met her at the volcano rescue in Iceland. She's a pilot."

Rose was in shock. She and Caius had always been kindred spirits in their inability to move forward after they lost their one and only love. And now to hear that he had found someone else…was moving forward, was like a kick to the gut. How _dare _he?

"And what do you think Athena would have thought about this? Or Jane? What would they think about the man they loved forgetting about them?" She seethed and Caius grabbed her arm and pulled her outside the tent. Once out in the dusty air, Rose yanked her arm free and paced, her fingernails digging into her palms.

"Rosie…" He soothed but she spun back towards him, her finger pointing at him.

"No…you don't get to do this. You were with me with this. We were together." She yelled, hating the tears that sprung to her eyes.

"No Rose, we were never together. I loved Athena and God knows how I adored Jane, but after having them gone for so long now I am able to see things more clearly. We didn't have the kind of love that you and Emmett shared. I mean, my child…losing my child is a pain I will carry with me forever but Athena, I think we would have ended things sooner rather than later. So I don't feel like going on with my life, marrying Rachel, is bad. I think…I hope that Athena would want me to be happy." He said with a small smile. He reached forward and pulled Rose into his arms. "This is it girl. This has to end. The way you treat yourself is a disgrace to his memory. If you want to find someone…to _be_ with someone, then do that. But stop this senseless, meaningless pain."

Rose nodded against his chest while he ran his hand up and down her back. As the chaos continued around them, they stood in their tiny bit of peace…and healed.

**Aww…again…poor Rose. **

**Let me here from ya…you know I love to see what you think!**

**And I donated an outtake from my two-shot 'Choices' to MAL's fundraiser. Please think about donating…**

teasersmostlyalurker . /2011/11/kitkat681 . html

**Muah!**

**K**


	26. Chapter 26

**So I told you things were changing and this chapter and the next set the stage. I missed you over the weekend...I really did. I saw most of you during my freaky drabble 'Strangers on a Train' and my birthday one-shots 'Shocked to the Core' and 'You say it's your Birthday'. Do you have any idea how amazing it is for me to see your names in alerts and reviews for everything I do? It shocks and awes me. Truly.**

**Melanie is off the rest of the week and is under strict orders to rest...so I hope she is listening. The next few chapters of 'Awaken' are the best yet...well so far anyway.**

**Dalloway5906 broke my heart with her 'Reboot' update...seriously.**

**Now...lets go.**

"How does that make you feel when he tells you that Bella?" The therapist asked as she tapped on her chin with the edge of her glasses. Bella tried not to roll her eyes at the inane question as she held tighter to Edward's hand. When he suggested therapy, she had been apprehensive, but he had so wanted them to go together to sort out not only her issues, but his as well. But now they were sitting her listening to the therapist 'hmmm' and 'ah' and she was ready to just shove those annoying glasses right up her ass.

"It makes me sad that I can't be everything he needs. I'm not strong enough." Bella answered, trying to be truthful because she knew if she lied then they would never stand a chance at getting better.

"Bella…" Edward protested, but the therapist stopped him.

"I think that takes a lot of courage to say Bella, so thank you. But I need you to see past your perceived faults and look at the big picture. When it gets too hard for you after a rescue and you retreat into the bathroom to let it out, don't you wish you could just do that with Edward and not all alone?"

"Of course I do but I'm afraid that if I let him see that part of me he'll go running." Bella said quietly and again Edward tried to speak but was interrupted.

"You are not giving him a chance. He wants to be there for you. Wouldn't you want to be there for him in his time of need?" Bella nodded, remembering how he had clung to her after the memorial ceremony for his friends. She had felt so strong and steady as she soothed him and she realized that maybe he needed to be that for her as well.

"You see now don't you?" The therapist asked softly and Bella nodded. "Then we are on the right track."

*()*()*

"So Edward, how long do you think your girl will be dragging you around by the collar? I mean when are you going to get back into the action?"

Edward had hesitated to answer his phone when his old buddy James Michael's number popped up on his screen, but he knew if he ignored him he would just keep calling.

"Drop it James. Did you see the spread they did of my coverage of the Vermont floods? I heard talk of another Pulitzer." Edward said casually, knowing how pissed James would be if Edward got _another _award.

"Yeah well I could do wonders with a subject like that too. It's when you have to dig for the picture that talent really shows." James replied and Edward couldn't help but smile at his petulant tone. He pulled the phone away when it beeped, signaling another call. When his sister's name came up he quickly said goodbye to James and answered.

"Rose?" He said, nervous before he even heard her voice. She had been different in the two weeks they had been back from Turkey. He worried that something was really wrong.

"Edward…is Bella with you?" She asked and he could tell from her tone that something was wrong.

"No, she's at the training center with Jake today working with some of the new recruits. Why, what's up?" He said, getting up from the couch, suddenly needing to move.

"Um…mom just called me. Bella's mother was in a car accident. Dad is taking care of her and he thought that maybe Bella would want to go see her. It's not looking good."

"Shit." He sighed and Rose gave a humorless laugh.

"Yeah, that about sums it up. I know Renee pretty much burned her bridges when Bella tried to talk to her, but I really think that Bella will regret it if she doesn't at least try to see her before she dies."

"Yeah, I couldn't agree more." Edward said as he walked into their bedroom to start packing.

*()*()*

Edward was waiting at the training center when Bella and Jake came out. He was leaning up against the Jeep with his hands in his pockets and Bella tried hard not to drool.

"Hey sexy, what are you doing here? I thought we were meeting at home to…" Bella said but stopped when she saw the luggage in the back seat. "Edward, what's going on?"

"Your mother was in an accident." He said and Bella tried hard not to let any of her emotions show. Inside she was feeling dread and anger and misery, but outside she was perfectly calm.

"So?" She said, her voice flat as she tried to reach around Edward and open the car door.

"So, we need to go out there. Our flight leaves in an hour, so let's go." He said as he moved to let her get in the car. But she stood there with her arms crossed over her chest and a scowl on her face.

"I'm not going Edward."

"Yes, you fucking are. WE are. Do _not _make me drag your ass into the car. You know you will live with this for the rest of your life if you don't go see her, so just get in the fucking car Isabella." He growled, his voice filled with just enough venom to motivate her. As she sat down in the passenger seat she huffed at him.

"Overbearing ass."

He smiled gently at her, knowing how big a front she was putting on for his benefit. And perhaps even her own. Quickly settling Jake in the back, he leaned in a kissed her forehead before stating the Jeep.

"You know it, love."

*()*()*

"I'm sorry Bella. I wish the news was better. She has not regained consciousness after we had to do the surgery to relieve the pressure in her skull. I don't think…she is not going to come out of this." Carlisle said as he sat next to Bella in the waiting room, holding her hand tightly. He and Esme had been to Kansas City several times since Edward and Bella moved in together and she had formed a tight bond with Edward's father. He wasn't trying to replace her own father, just maybe be there when she needed him. And right now as she was listening to him explain that her mother was pretty much gone, she needed him more than ever.

"Can she hear me?" She asked as they walked down the empty hallway. She and Edward had gotten in to SeaTac late and Esme had met them there and drove them to the hospital. Now Carlisle was breaking the rules to let her see her mother past visiting hours. He put his arm around her shoulder as he guided her into the room.

"You can talk to her. You need to." He said, not really answering her question. She gasped and tears sprung to her eyes as she looked down at her mother. She was on a ventilator and had tubes and wires all around her. For a moment she flashed to the memory of Edward lying in the same hospital after the earthquake and how devastated she had been when his monitors flat lined. And then she felt guilty because she realized that if that were to happen to her mother right now, all she would feel was relief.

"I'm going to go fill Edward in. You take all the time you need." Carlisle said as he pressed a kiss to her temple and left. Bella approached the bed cautiously, as if waiting for her mother to wake up and start spewing hate again. She stood at the side and watched the numbers flash on the monitors, trying to figure out what to say.

"Hi mom." She started, figuring it was easier to get the mundane things out of the way first. "Edward's dad is taking good care of you. He…ah…he has been great to me too. Loving Edward and getting close to his family is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I really wish you could have gotten to know him. He is so sweet and kind and he treats me like I am the best thing in the world. He looks at me and I can just tell that he is it for me. I want to be good for him, I really do, but I worry that I'm still not enough, that I'll never be enough. And that makes me sad. I want what you and Dad had before…well before.

Anyway, I wanted to come and say good bye to you before they shut off the machines. I'm not going to make that decision; I'm letting Carlisle handle that. I just…I wanted to tell you I love you, even after all the hateful things you said to me and the horrible way you treated me, I still love you. You're my mom."

Bella leaned down and pressed a kiss to her mother's forehead before she turned around and walked out. As the door closed behind her she heard the monitors beeping and the nurses and doctors headed into her mother's room, but she just kept walking. She had made her peace.

**A/N: Poor Bella...next chapter we get some grief and some Rose...**

**See you next Wednesday!**


	27. Chapter 27

**I wish I had more chapters banked so I could update twice a week. I MISS not hearing from you so often. **

**Big changes coming! BIG…HUGE!**

**I also can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I am thinking maybe six more chapters…but that could change as I sit down to write them…**

**Big love to Melanie who fixed all my stupid errors. I will be heading up to Toronto the first weekend in December to see her and Cejsmom and Coldplaywhore and a bunch of other Twigirls. SO EXCITED!**

**Dalloway6906…tomorrow…all I'm sayin'.**

**So…anyone gonna go to the movies? I gots a special 8pm screening tomorrow. Yep…I'm just THAT cool. **

"Shit Bella, I'm really fucking cold." Edward shouted, his teeth chattering. They had been in Seattle for a few days dealing with all of the issues surrounding Renee's death, but a freak snowstorm in the northeast had sent them scattering to get to the hardest hit areas. No one was ready for the insane amounts of snow that fell and there were also widespread power outages all over the area that were making rescue efforts even harder.

They were in Peru, Massachusetts where over 32 inches of snow had fallen in a little over two days. No one was prepared, which meant that snow shovels were still in basements while porch furniture was getting buried under piles of the white stuff. Edward was so cold his fingers were too numb to work his camera, so he stowed it back in their rental SUV and headed off after Bella and Jake who were on the trail of some missing hikers. All that was visible of Jake was the tip of his nose and his wagging tail as he forged forward through the snow. Bella followed closely behind him, trying to keep up but failing miserably. Trudging through hip deep snow was more difficult than it looked, as Edward was quickly finding out.

"Help!"

Edward radioed in their location and followed the sound of Jake's excited barking and the call for help. Bella was busy trying to dig out one of the hikers who had apparently gotten stuck.

"Edward…can you just…yeah…and then if you could reach…perfect. Hold on, one more tug." Bella encouraged as she yanked on the hiker's leg and she sprawled backwards into the snow as he came free. Jake pounced on top of her and she laughed as Edward watched on. The hiker was fine, nothing a hot shower and some coffee wouldn't fix but what this rescue had done for his girl and Jake, that was something amazing to see. He had never seen her _really _happy and carefree and he wished he had his camera with him to capture the moment. But he was hoping that he would get to see her that way a lot more now.

*()*()*

Rose rolled over in her bed and swept her hand across the nightstand, trying to get to her phone. Her eyes were bleary, a side effect from the two bottles of wine she plowed through the night before she guessed but she still managed to silence the ringing that was like an ice pick to her brain.

"Yeah?" She mumbled as she rolled back over and tried to find the warm spot she had vacated.

"You eat peanuts, shell and all." His deep voice rumbled and she stopped breathing.

"You rub your feet together under the covers before you go to sleep."

"You hate onions but love onion soup."

"You want children but an accident when you were just a kid may mean they're not possible."

"And when you run your nails down my back it makes my toes curl."

Rose was sobbing quietly into her pillow as she tried hard not to throw up.

"Emmett?" She whispered and she got a grunt in reply.

"My name is John." He answered back, just as quiet.

"Where are you?"

"I'm…" Rose felt her world stop spinning when she heard the women's voice coming through the line.

"Hey John can you get Marie, she's crying and I'm trying to feed Alec."

"Oh God…" Rose choked and she struggled to press the end button on her phone, even though she could hear him yelling excuses on the other end.

It was him. It had to be him. No one knew those things about her except for him. How, she didn't understand. But apparently he had moved on. And now so should she, starting tomorrow when she got a new cell phone number.

And with that decision made, she rolled over and screamed into her pillow until she lost her voice.

*()*()*

Edward was really worried about Rose. The last time he saw her she looked like the walking dead and he had not been able to get her on her phone in over a week. He had been asked to head to New York for a few days to discuss the terms of his new contract. He was not too worried about it, his editor loved the shots he sent from the Vermont flood and he knew the few he took during the snow in Massachusetts would be just as well received. What he was worried about was how Bella would do while he was gone. They had not spent any time apart, save for the few hours each day when she was at the training facility. He was dreading these days apart and had hoped Rose could help him by keeping Bella distracted while he was gone. But he had not been able to get in touch with her and it was driving him crazy.

He started to dial her number again but a call came through first. He answered the unknown number and was startled when it was Rose.

"I ah…I had to change my number. Listen I need you to come and pick me up." She said and he was instantly alert. He had gotten a call like this once before.

"Where?"

"I'm over on Prospect. I'll text you the address." She said and then she was gone. Edward looked at the phone and when her text came in he headed over to the location. When he pulled up outside a large medical facility he was nervous all over again. As he got in the elevator and pressed the button for her floor, he could not help but look at the listing of all the doctors that were on that same floor.

Obstetrics.

Oncology.

Hematology.

Nephrology.

Shit.

He was a mess by the time the door opened and he went to the right suite. The sign on the door did little to calm him because women with cancer were still treated by OB/GYNs right? Rose was not in the waiting room so he went to the desk.

"I'm here to pick up my sister, Rose McCarty." He said quietly, feeling that same pang of loss he got every time he said Emmett's name.

"Oh of course, she said you were coming. She is still recovering from the procedure. Here is a list of things you can expect over the next few days and then the doctor will want to see her for a follow up in about three weeks. Will you be staying with her while she gets back on her feet?" She said sweetly but Edward was unable to respond as he looked down at the papers in his hand. When he still did not speak the receptionist stood and looked down at the pamphlet in his hand.

"Oh my God, I am so sorry. I gave you the wrong one. I can't apologize enough." She said quickly as she snatched the pamphlet on what to expect after an abortion out of his hand and put a different one in its place.

"There…that's the right one." Edward still just stared at the cover.

**In-vitro Fertilization and You**

"Edward." He looked up at the sound of his sister's voice. She looked completely different from the haggard, tired woman he had known for so long.

"Rose…what?" He said, holding up the papers so she could see. She smiled as she slowly walked towards him and with a wave to the receptionist, guided him into the hall and towards a small seating area. She sat down and faced him.

"I want a baby. Emmett has…" She started but quickly corrected herself, not wanting to go into detail about the calls she had been getting. Plus it didn't matter anyway. He was not hers anymore even if he _was _alive. "Emmett is gone and I want this. I want someone to take care of, someone to love. We had frozen some of Emmett's sperm before we left on our honeymoon because the doctors had always told me I might have to go this route what with my history, and Emmett was so young and healthy it just made sense to do it then. I had completely put it out of my mind until I came across the bill for the storage fee."

Edward grabbed her hand and pulled her close.

"I'm sorry I've not been there for you Rose. I just…I didn't know what to do." He whispered and she nodded against his shoulder.

"Well then be here for me now…you and Bella. Cause I am sure there will be plenty of dirty diapers for an Aunt and Uncle to help change." She smiled, pulling him up and putting her arm through his as they walked towards the car. "What do you think about a trip to Babies R' Us? Too soon?"

**So yeah…let me hear it! **

**See you next week!**


	28. Chapter 28

**Hi! Man I tell you what…being sick sucks big giant donkey balls. I hate it…especially when you own your own business and can't take a sick day…although there is no such thing as a sick day when you're a mom anyway.**

**Melanie kept me on track with this chapter…Thank GOD! Otherwise we would all be confused as fuck. I am working on the last regular chapter of this story today…chapter 32 and my goal is to make Melanie cry before I'm done.**

**Happy Thanksgiving to those of you who will be consuming massive quantities of food tomorrow!**

**Ready? Set? GO!**

**5 months later**

"So here is the head. This is a great shot of the profile. Weight is looking right on target for 20 weeks. Everything looks perfect." The obstetrician said as she ran the ultrasound probe over Rose's belly. Her hand was clenched tightly with Edward's while he had Bella tucked firmly under his arm. Either Edward and Bella or Esme had accompanied Rose to every one of her appointments and they were thrilled to be able to attend this one, as Rose was introduced to her child for the first time. When she was asked if she wanted to know the sex of the baby, she declined. There really were no great surprises in life anymore, she thought.

Esme and Carlisle were all over the three of them to re-locate back to Washington before the baby was born. Esme had already used all their frequent flier miles traveling from Seattle to Kansas City and Rose was only 5 months along. Edward didn't want to push the issue on Bella, since he knew it would be hard for her to be so close to her hometown, even if both her parents were gone now. He had thought she would struggle more with her mother's death, but after one good cathartic cry right after her funeral, Bella seemed to put it behind her. He still made sure to always be ready for anything with his girl though.

Now as they walked out of the doctor's office, Edward was again hit with the need to be closer to his parents. It might have been the way Rose's hand rubbed across her belly or the wistful look on Bella's face as she did it, but he felt he needed to have all the people he loved as close to him as possible.

"Rose?" He asked as he opened the car door for her. She smiled up at him as she struggled to get her legs into the vehicle.

"Yeah?"

"Are you going to move back home?" He asked, keeping his voice low so Bella couldn't hear as she got in on the other side. Rose nodded with a shy smile and he smiled back.

He had some planning to do.

*()*()*

"Miss Swan, how long do rescue dogs usually last?" A small blond boy asked as he rubbed behind Jake's ears. The dog grumbled happily while Bella tried to find a tactful way to explain a dog's life expectancy to a five year old. She and Jake were visiting a pre-school in downtown Kansas City as part of their Career Day. She tried to be as involved in the community as possible and this was just another way to stay connected.

"Well, they don't usually start their Search and Rescue training until they are at least 10 weeks old. From there it takes about a year for them to be ready to go on scene and most dogs will usually retire after eight years on the job. Jake here is five and still raring to go." Bella laughed as the dog rolled over onto his back and flopped his paws to the side, begging for a belly scratch which the kids happily obliged.

"Any other questions for Miss Swan and her rescue dog Jake?" The teacher asked before the kids clapped and Bella gathered up Jake's vest and leash and left. The weather was miserable for March and as she looked up at the gray sky her mind suddenly went to what she had been doing a year earlier.

A year ago Edward had not been in her life. She had not made her peace with her father's death or her mother's behavior. All she had was Jake and her job. Now her life was full and she could not have been happier.

Her smile was blinding as she pulled into the driveway of their house. Jake jumped out of the open door as soon as Bella stopped and he ran into his doggie door, barking the whole way. Bella tried to shush him, but she was laughing too hard as she listened to Edward's yelling and complaining as he got mauled inside.

"Jake…get down! How the hell are you so well trained and then do something like this?" He shouted and she heard glass breaking along with Jake's excited whines.

"Edward?" She called as she started down the hall to their guest room, where all the noise was coming from.

"Don't come back here!" He shouted, sounding all kinds of keyed up. But of course she didn't listen and crept down the hall. When she got to the partially open doorway her breath caught and she felt tears sting her eyes.

Twinkling lights were everywhere. Hanging from the walls and looking like stars in the darkened room. The bed was covered in flowers of all shapes and colors and it looked like a meadow right there in their house. And standing amongst all that beauty, were her two boys. Edward was trying to pull a black box from inside Jake's mouth, but he was not giving up without a fight.

"Just…let…go." Edward snarled under his breath and Jake answered with a growl of his own. She put her hand over her mouth to stifle the giggle, but failed miserably. When Jake turned his head towards the sound, the box flew out of his mouth, along with a pretty hefty string of slobber, and landed at her feet, the clasp popping open. Edward let go of Jake's scruff and jumped towards the box, tripping over the dog on his way down. Bella bent down and picked up the box, her knees going weak when she saw what was inside.

"Bella…" Edward whispered, sounding nervous and anxious and just…petrified. She held the slobber-covered box in her hands and looked up at him, her eyes overflowing with tears.

"Shit." He whispered as he crawled over to her. He pulled her into his arms, crushing the box between them. "I _knew _you weren't ready. Shit. I'm sorry. I should have waited. I am _such _a fucking fuckup."

Bella pulled away so she could press her trembling fingers against his lips.

"This…this is perfection. Were you going to ask me something?" She breathed as she handed him the broken box. He gaped at her as she took the ring from the box and slid it onto her finger.

"Marry me?"

"Yes." She sighed and he bent down and kissed her lips so sweetly, so gently that she went weak in his arms.

Yep, she thought, perfection.

**Awww….**

**When do you want the next chapter? Saturday or next Wednesday? You gotta let me know!**


	29. Chapter 29

**You all wanted it on Saturday…so I'm caving and giving you it today….**

**I can't tell you how excited I am that so many of you are enjoying this. We are getting close to the end…and if you know me at all you know it is not going to be all sunshine and rainbows. Just…trust me.**

**I FINALLY got a chance to chat it up with Melanie last night…and man did I need to. I was so fail when I was sick. 'Awaken' is rocking my world with every update…go read it.**

**Deep breath…**

"Bella, we have a tsunami coming ashore in Manila right now. The transport will be leaving in two hours. Get to the airport." Rose snapped as soon as Bella answered the phone. She hung up and rolled over, nudging both Edward and Jake. She opened her eyes and was momentarily shocked to see her new surroundings. They had only been in Seattle for a few weeks. After Esme and Carlisle heard about their engagement, they were adamant that they move back to their hometown, and when Rose told the pair she was moving, their decision was made. Esme managed to find both Rose and Edward and Bella houses just a few miles from their own home. She was hoping to be overwhelmed with Grandchildren soon.

The move was hectic what with Bella having to relocate the training facility from Kansas City to Seattle and packing up all their things. They decided to have Jake fly with Rose while they drove the massive moving truck across the country. If they couldn't handle being together for a few days in a moving truck, then they shouldn't be getting married. The truck was loaded to the brim with the accumulated junk of their lives. They could have driven straight through and been there in a little over a day, but they didn't want to be rushed. They figured that they could see a little bit of the country on their way. So they decided to go through Wyoming and Montana, mapping out the tourist attractions they wanted to see. They fought over who controlled the music and how often Bella made them stop for her to pee, but other than that, the move had been rather painless and they all loved their new homes. They still had a pile of boxes that needed to be unpacked, but to Bella, everything was perfect.

Esme and Carlisle were over the moon having not only their son and daughter home, but also their soon to be daughter-in-law just a few miles away. Sunday dinners were a requirement as long as everyone wasn't working. The girls took turn cooking and everyone was in agreement that Rose could be skipped over if they actually wanted to be able to eat. They all wondered how she had managed to keep herself alive over the last few years since she was unable to make anything even remotely edible. But she was willing to learn and Esme and Bella were more than happy to take her under their wings.

Bella sighed as she threw her arm over Edward's side and nuzzled her nose into his neck. She never imagined that she would belong to a family like this again. She loved Edward and his family so much; she sometimes wondered when she would wake up from this dream. Everything was perfect. As she breathed in Edward's scent, she reveled in his warmth. She wished she was waking him up for another reason, preferably a dirty one, but they needed to get up if they were going to make it to the airport before the transport left.

"Edward…" She whispered in his ear and held back a giggle as he moaned and pulled her arm tighter around him. "We have a huge wave coming ashore in Asia and we need to go."

"Hmmm…tell them to call back later." He moaned as he snuggled further into the covers, making her laugh.

"No Edward, if you're coming with me, we need to leave now." She said with a sigh as she pushed the covers back and got up, heading to the closet for their already packed bags. Jake realized what was happening and jumped of the bed with a huff and headed downstairs to go outside before they left.

Edward was still in bed when she got back from the bathroom, all dressed and ready.

"Edward!" She shouted as she grabbed his water bottle off the nightstand and squirted him, making him squeal like a girl and jump up from the bed. She put her hand over her mouth as she watched him shake the water from his hair and glared at her.

"Sorry…I tried to get you up." She smiled and took off running as he started towards her. "Get dressed. We leave in five minutes." She called over her shoulder.

"Good thing I love you!" He shouted towards her retreating form.

*()*()*

"No. No way. No!" Edward yelled as he watched his sister load her bags onto the military transport plane. Rose sighed as she turned with her hands on her hips.

"Edward…I'm going. I'm only seven months pregnant; my doctor said I'm fine to fly for a few more weeks. I promise to stay in the command center but this is a massive disaster Edward. I need to be there for my team." Rose said calmly, putting her hand on his shoulder. "I promise I'll be careful."

Although everything in him was against it, he knew she was right. They were going to need all the help they could get.

*()*()*

"Bella, you and Jake are heading towards San Rafael. Take Edward with you." Rose said, handing out radios and maps to the crew before they got in the boats and jeeps that would take them to their search location. The low lying capital city of Manila had been covered by nearly 30 feet of water when the tsunami hit. The water had receded but there were still areas that were only accessible by boat. Jake had his orange life vest on as they sat in the old jeep and drove through the devastated area. Edward's camera was in his hand as soon as they stopped and he helped Bella out and then took off on foot. There was so much to capture.

"Be careful!" Bella called after him and he raised his hand to his lips to throw her a kiss.

"Love you!" He shouted and she waved before she called Jake to task and they ran towards the first building that needed to be cleared, an apartment building. After the first twenty minutes, Bella and Jake had yet to find a survivor. It was going to be a long day.

**Short I know…**

**See you Wednesday…**


	30. Chapter 30

**HELLO! So…you ready? I'm ready. I'll be out of town with my girls Melanie and Cejsmom and a bunch of other amazing Twiladies…so the update will be on Friday…I think you can wait that long…maybe not.**

**Your reviews and alerts and Facebook love are overwhelming…I love this story…so much, and for you to care about it as well is amazing!**

**Hold on tight…it gets rough…**

"Rose, we got a problem over here!" The head rescue coordinator called as Rose balanced one radio on her shoulder as she looked over the map. She turned her head and looked at Chris Walter, a man she had worked with several times before at different locations.

"What's up?" She called, setting her things down and waddling over to where he stood, arms braced on a table and a map in front of him. He pointed at a neighborhood a few miles from where the command center was located.

"We got a call about an orphanage here, in Santa Anna, that is underwater. All the other teams are swamped and can't make it there. I'm trying to get a few team leaders to go down there and…" He said and Rose interrupted him.

"I'll go." She said and she turned around to her station to grab her pack and get her hip waders on. Chris followed her over and put his hands over hers.

"No, I wanted you to stay here and hold down the fort." He said, gesturing to the group of people that were coming and going. Rose shook her head as she tugged the thick rubber up over her thighs.

"I'm going."

*()*()*

"Hey Jen, did you see Edward around anywhere?" Bella shouted to one of the other searchers and felt her heart drop when the woman shook her head. They had been in the same neighborhood all morning and had only found ten survivors. Edward had stayed close for a while but he disappeared about an hour earlier and she was desperate to find him. Something just felt…off.

"Jake…you think you can find him boy?" She asked as she leaned down and scratched behind his ears. He looked up at her with a look that said 'of course I can,' and took off through the knee-deep water. With his nose to the ground, Bella had to make sure he didn't walk right into any stationary objects, like cars, which he tended to do when he was tracking. They went deeper into the deserted neighborhood and Bella was suddenly worried. The streets were empty; what would Edward be doing all the way down here?

Jake started to bark and chuff as they got closer to what looked like it had once been a school before the massive wave pummeled it to rubble. Jake pulled at the lead, trying desperately to get up the stairs.

"Wait Jake, let me radio in our position." Bella said, her voice trembling as she called into the central command and gave them her GPS coordinates. It was only then that she made her way up to the building. Jake barked once, and she looked down at him.

"He's in there?" She whispered and he whined deep in his chest.

It was all the confirmation she needed.

*()*()*

"McCarty, you take that section over there, but if I see you lifting anything I'm sending you back to the tent, you got it?" Chris barked at Rose as he pointed to one of the large trailer-like buildings that had once been home to over two dozen orphaned Filipino infants and children. Rose hitched her bag higher on her shoulder and trudged over the fallen trees and branches to get to the doorway of the building. She flashed her light around the dark interior, her heart clenching at the sight of the overturned cribs and toys strewn everywhere. As she made her way inside, the smell made her gag and she wondered if it had been this bad before the tsunami came through.

"Hello? Kumusta?" Rose shouted, using her meager Filipino vocabulary to try and see if there was anyone left inside. She stopped moving and the only sounds she heard were the other rescue workers outside and the water that lapped against her boots. She turned towards the door, ready to search the next building when she heard someone yell.

"Help us! Please!" A deep male voice echoed from the back of the building. Rose took off as fast as she could, pushing the broken furniture out of the way. She stopped at the edge of a sink hole that had opened up in the ground, taking the back half of the trailer with it. She shone the light into the darkness below and her heart exploded in her chest as the most perfect and familiar pair of blue eyes looked back up at her.

"Please…I can't get Annie out! And the babies are down here!" He shouted and she found she was unable to speak for a moment. He was alive…she knew he was but to see him there in front of her, it was like an icicle through her heart, painful and numbing all at the same time. She wanted to call his name, to tell him who she was…who _he _was. But instead she dug deep and mustered her training and called in to the command center and then lowered a rope into the hole.

She could do this.

She had to.

*()*()*

"Get the hell out of the way! You are gonna get yourself killed!" Chris shouted as he ran into the building and found Rose tying one end of the rope off on a support pillar. She had not been able to go back to the mouth of the sinkhole, but she was trying to set up the rescue equipment so they would be able to get them out as soon as the rest of the team arrived. With shaky hands, she let Chris take over and stepped away blindly until her back was up against the wall. She watched as they lowered down a metal basket and breathed a sigh of relief when a little blue bundle was pulled up safely. When Chris held the baby out to her, she took it without a second thought. She cradled the little one to her chest and looked down at his dark eyes. Was this Emmett's son? Her entire body protested at the thought.

More noise brought her attention back to the activity around the hole. Two more babies were brought up and handed off to the rescue personnel and then finally, a woman was pulled up, her dark hair matted to her head with blood but she seemed okay.

Rose held her breath as the harness was lowered once more and the rescuers struggled to pull him up. His curly hair popped through the opening first, followed by his dimpled smile and bright blue eyes. She bit the inside of her cheek to keep from screaming as the woman threw herself into his arms the second he was free of the equipment. The child in her arms cooed and she looked down at him, her tear-filled eyes meeting his wide, frightened ones.

"Shh, darling. I've got you." She whispered to him, stroking his hair back off his forehead with her free hand. When she looked back up she was caught in Emmett's stare. His arms fell from the woman's body and his mouth dropped open.

"Rose?"

**Wha? Huh? **

**See you Friday.**

**Rec time:**

**Bornonhalloween is doing a daily drabble called 'Lather, Rinse, Repeat.' It is like a daily dose of perfection.**

**Robsmyyummy Cabanaboy just posted her first foray into the fic world and is already rocking my socks with her 'Last Call'. Go read it now!**

**And you know everyone else I always rec...read them too. I mean it!  
><strong>


	31. Chapter 31

**Okay…you all have someone to hold onto right? Hold them close and just keep chanting…I trust kitkat…I trust kitkat. I'll be gone this weekend so feel free to yell and scream in your reviews…I love that.**

**I'm still working on a few things in the next chapter…so it will be in your inbox on Wednesday…**

**Melanie's amazing new story 'Awaken' is up on the poll at the Lemonade Stand…please go give her your vote…she totes deserves it.**

**Dalloway5906 needs some cyberlove…please send your kisses her way. Love you girl!**

**Deep breath and here we go…**

"Edward?" Bella called as she followed Jake into the dark building. Night was quickly approaching and the search would soon be called off until first light. Bella's radio squawked, the commander's voice coming across the line telling her exactly what she had just thought.

"All searchers please report back to the command center immediately. The search has been suspended until morning."

No fucking way was she leaving this building without Edward, she thought.

"Go Jake." She encouraged as she moved the flashlight across the hallway. There were doors that opened off the main hall and her breath caught as Jake pulled her past each one.

"Edward?" She called again and again, each time praying she would get a response. But all she ever heard was silence. When Jake tried to pull her down the stairs to what looked like a basement or a bomb shelter, she balked. It was dark, really dark and her flashlight was already doing that wavy jumpy thing that always happened right before the batteries died. But just as she pulled him back, she heard something.

"Help!" Bella took off down the dark stairwell, the beam of her flashlight bouncing off the walls as she ran.

"Edward? Edward!" Bella called and she and Jake stopped dead when she saw his boots sticking out from a pile of stone.

"Bella!" He yelled, his voice muffled through the debris.

"I'm here Edward. What happened?" She cried as she bent down next to the place his feet disappeared and started to pull rocks off his legs.

"No don't! The pile is unsteady and I've got two little kids in here." He shouted. Bella froze. She knew she should go outside and see if there were any more rescuers around. This was not a situation they should be handling on their own. She looked up and saw that it was not only the pile of rocks that was on top of Edward and the children, but a support pillar that could possibly hold up the entire building. This was not good.

"Bella…just come by my feet and I'll have one of the little ones come through." He said and she knelt down next to his feet and put the flashlight down so it lit the passage. Soon she saw a dirty, scared little face appear next to Edward's hips. She reached her hands out and the little girl grabbed hold and didn't let go. Bella pulled the little girl into her lap and held her, whispering soothing words into her ear, although she doubted the little one spoke any English.

"Here comes the other one." Edward said and Bella sat the girl down next to Jake, who snuggled up next to her like a doggie blanket. The second child was larger and Bella watched with her heart in her throat as several rocks tumbled down in the passageway behind the child. She tried to tell herself that Edward was fine, but the quiet grunts of pain she heard were hard to ignore. With both children out, Bella put her head into the opening and spoke quietly to Edward.

"I need you to come out now." She said and when she heard only silence she started to weep.

"Edward…you need to come out now." She whispered and she heard him take a deep breath before he spoke.

"Bella…if I come out this whole place comes down too."

*()*()*

Rose held perfectly still as the world continued to spin around her. The little boy in her arms squirmed and someone took him, leaving her feeling vulnerable without anything to hide behind. She wrapped her arms around her belly instead, taking some comfort in their child's slight weight beneath her skin.

"Rose, your name is Rose." He whispered as he stepped away from the woman he had been embracing and walked towards her. He had a slight limp and his skin was darker but other than that, he was the same as he had been the day she married him.

"You are…I remember you." He breathed as he stood in front of her. She kept her face down, looking at his hands, the hands that had held her so many times. A sob caught in her throat and she took a shuddering breath. She closed her eyes and felt the tears on her cheek as he reached up and tipped her chin up with his finger. "Look at me."

Rose's eyes fluttered open and she couldn't breathe as she looked into his blue eyes. Her chest hurt as he looked down at her. Did he truly know her?

"Emmett." Her voice barely above a whisper and she realized that it was the first time she had spoken his name since he disappeared. He blinked rapidly, as if he was suddenly blinded by bright light and then he met her eyes once again.

"Am I?" He spoke, so much yearning and curiosity in his voice that Rose laughed. She nodded her head and smiled up at him.

"Yes. You're Emmett Avery McCarty." She sighed, loving the fact that she could say his name without any pain. He was right there…right in front of her.

"And you're my Rose." He said, without question. And dear God how good it felt to be claimed again.

"Yes. I'm your Rose, your wife." She laughed and his face broke out in a brilliant smile as if he had just been told he won the lottery. He reached for her then but faltered when his abdomen bumped into her belly. His face got dark as he placed his hand on top of her protruding baby bump.

"I don't…I've been gone for…_years_." He rasped, and Rose could hear the accusation in his tone.

"It's yours. The baby is _yours_." She breathed as she put her hand over his on her belly. There was so much she needed to tell him, all the pain and lies and sex, but right now all that mattered was that he was alive and some part of him remembered her.

And that was enough.

*()*()*

"Bella, I need you to get those kids outta here." Edward said, his voice sounding strange. Bella started to protest but he stopped her. "Bella…now!"

She backed her head out of the opening and pulled the little girl into her arms, tucking the older boy under her other arm she told Jake to stand guard with Edward and she walked the kids out into the rapidly cooling night. When she saw a pair of headlights flash, she waved her arms and breathed a sigh of relief when they stopped. The two rescuers took the kids and promised to send a team out as soon as they could, but warned that it might be morning before the commander sanctioned anyone to be out again. Apparently there had been reports of looters that were shooting first and asking questions second. It always confused Bella that people could hurt the ones that were trying to help.

With the children safe, Bella sprinted back into the building. She could hear Edward talking as she got down the stairs. She slowed to a walk and listened to the echo of his voice as he spoke to Jake.

"So you need to take care of her…you hear me? You keep her safe and don't let anything happen to her. Don't let her stop living. Damn it Jake…you hear me?" He shouted and she heard Jake whine.

No…

She wasn't giving up without a fight.

**Dear lord…what the hell am I doing? Next one is even worse…be prepared…**

**Oh and I'm not sure if 'The Curse of the Swan' will update today…I don't have the chapter back from Melanie and she is busting her ass to get her house ready for me…and she lost her iTouch yesterday so she is pretty down. It may or may not be in your inbox later…**


	32. Chapter 32

**So…when I started writing this…I worried if I could really pull this chapter off. This is the culmination of the story in my mind and I really hope I did it justice.**

**Melanie helped me change some HUGE things and next chapter you will understand why and want to get her address so you can send her a fruit basket…she loves watermelon by the way.**

**Okay…**

**Still trust me?**

**Short but it needed to be...  
><strong>

**Here we go…**

Bella made her way over to where Jake was sitting next to Edward's feet and got down on her knees next to him.

"You stop this right now. We'll…we'll just wait until the rescue team comes and they can put a jack in there to keep the building up so you can get out. Everything will be fine…you'll see." Bella whispered fiercely, praying that he would believe her.

"Bella…" He breathed and she could hear the tears in his voice. "I love you so damn much. I love everything about you. I love your tenacity and your gentle heart. I love the way you look right after you cum and the way your body…"

Bella's loud sobs interrupted him and he stopped. The tunnel was slowly collapsing around him, rocks and pieces of concrete falling against his back and legs with his every movement. It wouldn't be long before it all came down.

"Bella, you need to get out. Baby…do you hear me? The building is coming down." He rasped and he felt her fingers on his leg.

"I'm pregnant." She whispered and he closed his eyes and bit his lip to stop from screaming.

"Yeah?" He said, tears making his eyes blurry and his voice rough.

"Yeah. I was going to tell you when we got back." She said as her nails dug into his calf. "So you need to make it out. You need to be there with me. I don't want to do this alone like Rose is. I want you there…I _need _you there. We both need you."

Edward was silent as he listened to the love of his life weep. But this was it…the end. There was no getting out for him.

"Bella…you need to go Baby. I need you to be safe…both of you." He moaned as he closed his eyes. The ground suddenly shook slightly as they experienced an aftershock. Bella put her hands over her head as rocks came falling from above and she heard Edward cry out as the tunnel got tighter.

"Get out! Get out now Bella. I love you." He yelled as he kicked at her, trying desperately to get her to go.

"I won't leave you!" She screamed as she tried to pull him out. She froze when his limbs suddenly stopped moving. "No!"

Jake pushed his massive head into her chest and she stumbled back, her eyes never leaving Edward's motionless legs. The dog kept moving her backwards until she was finally outside…without even realizing it had happened. She sat down and wrapped her arms around her knees and just…

Lost it.

And as she fell apart, she never even noticed that Jake wasn't next to her.

*()*()*

Oh God, his heart hurt. As Edward closed his eyes and waited to die all he could think about was Bella…and their child. She would be a great mother. She would be patient and kind and that kid would be loved to pieces. When he had heard the yells from inside the building, he knew he had to do something. All he could think about was that they were someone's kids…and how would he feel if someone ignored his own kid's calls for help? But now, he was deserting his unborn child…and Bella.

When he heard the rocks shifting he took a deep breath and got ready. Bella's face flashed in front of his eyes and he wished he had gotten to kiss her one last time. Jake's sharp bark startled him and he turned as far as he could to watch as the dog wiggled into the tunnel with him. He started to panic as the rocks fell down on Jake's back but his protests fell on deaf ears. This was happening…no matter what.

*()*()*

Bella's throat was sore by the time she ran out of tears. She felt the ground shake before she heard the building start to collapse behind her. She spun around and watched wide-eyed as the roof fell in and dust and debris scattered all around. She put her arms over her head and screamed. When she felt hands on her arms she pushed them away, unable to deal with anyone. When she heard someone whisper in her ear she cursed the memory of his voice. When she raised her head and met his green eyes, she passed out.

Edward held Bella in his arms, not caring that they were bloody and aching. She was in his arms and that was all that mattered. The sudden flash of headlights blinded him as a jeep approached. He raised his hand and called out, ecstatic when he heard an answer back in English. He managed to stand up with Bella still in his arms and sat down in the passenger seat. He brushed aside the questions that were thrown at him, unable to process what had just happened. He held his precious cargo close as they sped through the dark streets of Manila, and all he could think was…

What the hell just happened?

**Exactly…right?**

**Did I…did I just kill Jake?**

**Not sure yet…**

**See you Saturday.**


	33. Chapter 33

**Hi! I would have gotten this out earlier but I had a shit load of updates to read…I mean come on…Transcendence, Lather, Rinse, Repeat, Animate Me, The Roommate and Despair are more important… **

**So…Melanie is entirely responsible for this chapter…I already told you to send you love and watermelon up to her…she deserves all the praise for this. **

**Guys…there is one more chapter left…**

"I can't believe it. I just can't believe you're here and you're alive and you're…" Rose rambled as she ran her hands over Emmett's arms and shoulders. He felt the same under her hands.

"Emmett?" A shy voice asked from behind Rose. They pulled apart but Emmett kept his arm around Rose's waist.

"Annie…this is my Rose." He said as he reached his hand out towards the woman. She took it and he pulled her into his other side. Rose tried hard not to bare her teeth as the woman snuggled up to her husband.

"Rose, this is Annie. She and her husband Matt took me in when I got out of the hospital and I worked with them to get this orphanage off the ground. And then when Matt died three years ago, looking out for her kinda became my job." He said with a smile and a kiss to her temple and Rose wanted to die. He _had _moved on. She tried to get out of his hold without causing a scene but he was not letting her go.

"Rose…it's not like that." Annie said as she stepped away from Emmett. "He's my friend, my best friend. And I always knew that one day you would come for him. Even if he couldn't remember his name…he always knew there was someone out there waiting for him."

Rose wanted to crawl in a hole and just die. Here she was, upset over Annie and Emmett's relationship meanwhile she had been out fucking everything with a cock. He had waited for her, and she didn't deserve him.

She turned towards him and opened her mouth, but a flurry of activity near the command center had them heading over to see what was going on. When she saw her brother, dirty and bleeding carrying an unconscious Bella into the make-shift hospital, she ran as fast as she could towards them, Emmett following close behind.

"Edward!" She yelled as soon as she was close enough to be heard over the commotion. He looked over his shoulder towards her and then stopped short when he saw who was standing behind her.

"Emmett?" He whispered, his arms tightening around Bella as he looked at his long dead brother-in-law. The big man smiled grimly and put his arm possessively around Rose's shoulders, his hand on her belly.

"That's what she tells me. Who are you?" He asked, his voice laced with accusation. Edward swallowed hard and attempted to smile.

"I'm Edward, Rose's brother." He said, but abandoned the conversation when Bella started to mumble. He looked down and noticed the trickle of blood at her hairline. He turned from Rose and Emmett and started towards the hospital at a run.

"Edward…where's Jake?" Rose called after him, but he had to ignore her question…

Or else he would break down.

*()*()*

"It's just a small cut, doesn't even need stitches. And I don't think she has a concussion. She's probably just in shock. We can keep her here under observation if you want but I really think she will be fine to go back to your hotel and sleep it off." The doctor explained to Edward as he signed off on other charts and held up the x-ray of someone who had a nasty looking fractured femur. As much as Edward wanted to get Bella into a nice warm bed, he needed to make sure everything was fine first.

"And the baby?" He inquired, his voice breaking. The doctor looked up at him with a smile and put his hand on Edward's shoulder.

"They are both fine man…take her someplace warm and relax. Everyone is fine." He assured him before he turned and walked out. Edward looked over at Bella sleeping soundly in the bed and thought no…not everyone is fine.

*()*()*

Bella came awake slowly. First she felt the comforting warmth of Edward beside her. Then the soft light that filtered through her closed eyelids. And finally she bolted upright when she realized there was no one sleeping on her feet.

"Jake!" She called, tears already in her eyes as Edward pulled her into his arms.

"I know." He whispered, his voice rough. She clung to him as she tried to remember bits and pieces of the night before.

"I didn't know…I thought he was right next to me." She whimpered and he held her even tighter, wishing he could take away her pain.

"I know Baby. He left me no choice. It was either that or you lost us both." Edward sighed, remembering Jake's unwavering resolve that he would be the one in that tunnel. She pushed away and looked up at him.

"I need to find him. I have to bring his…body home." She whispered brokenly and Edward nodded and pulled her back down to the sheets.

"We will Baby, we will."

*()*()*

"So…you slept with them?" Emmett asked, his voice barely above a whisper. Rose nodded and wiped at the tears that were streaming down her cheeks. The second they knew that Bella was fine she took Emmett back to her hotel room so they could talk. She _needed_ to tell him about what she had done while they were apart. It felt like the truth was eating away at her insides and the only way to stop it was to come clean.

"But…I don't understand." He sighed as his hands balled into fists on the table. "How could you _do _that?"

"I thought you were dead Emmett. And a big part of me died too. I missed you…so much." She panted as she watched his eyes harden and turn darker. "And I was punishing myself. I hated it…every single second. I never enjoyed it…never had an orgasm. And I never kissed them…never."

"And that's supposed to make me feel better? Knowing you didn't kiss them or get off? Do you know the last time _I_ had sex? It was with you, whenever the fuck that was. I couldn't…I wouldn't have even been able to get hard with someone else." He snarled as he stood up and started pacing the floor.

Rose sat at the table with her head in her hands and wept. He stopped next to her and looked down at her body as it shook with her tears and dropped to his knees, pulling her into his arms.

"I'm sorry. You didn't know, you thought I was dead. I should be grateful that you didn't move on and find someone else. I'm just…it hurts." He whispered and she started to cry louder at that.

Emmett held her tightly wondering how much more they could take. All he could think was they had been through so much – wasn't it enough yet?

*()*()*

The sun was high in the sky as Edward and Bella made their way through the wet streets and towards the building that nearly split them apart. There were already rescue works there, as well as her entire team. They knew how important it was to her to get Jake out…and take him home. Bella was passed from one set of comforting arms to another as they walked towards the steps. When they got to the top and she saw Rose and Emmett she nearly collapsed.

"What…how?" She gasped as Rose pulled her in for a hug.

"I'll tell you later. Right now how about we go get your boy?"

*()*()*

Bella stood and watched as the workers brought load after load of stone and debris out of the building. With every pass she thanked them for working so hard to find her dog, and they just smiled. They all knew how many lives and loved ones Jake had found over the years, and they would do anything to help bring Bella that kind of peace.

Edward went in when they got close so he could show them exactly where he had been trapped and Bella felt a wave of panic as he disappeared inside. Rose held her hand while she told her about how she found Emmett and his memory loss. The distraction worked and when she had calmed down, they waited patiently for Edward to come back out. When they heard shouting and yelling from inside, her heart raced, thinking that the building was coming down.

She saw his feet first. His worn boots stomping over rocks and garbage. His dirty jeans hugged his thighs as he powered towards her. And then there in his arms…

"Jake!" Bella cried as she ran towards them. Edward held the dog gently in his arms and his shaggy, dirty head turned at the sound of her voice. His eyes were full of pain but he managed to wag his tail and smile his doggie smile at her. She looked up at Edward as happy tears flowed down her cheeks at the miracle he was carrying. Together they carried him to a waiting Jeep and raced towards the hospital.

**See…Melanie made me see that I couldn't kill our boy. I think this is one of the first Jake's I really felt bad about killing…**

**See you Wednesday for the last chapter…unless Melanie says I need more…we'll see.**


	34. Chapter 34

**So...this is the end. I didn't want to drag it out just to drag it out and this felt like a very natural end point for our guys. **

**Melanie did some major overhauling with this chapter and I love her even more for just barreling though to make sure it is perfect.**

**Lets say goodbye...shall we?  
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**One year later**

"Edward?" Bella hollered up the stairs as she cradled her daughter against her chest. They were late…as usual. It seemed like it took them a ridiculous amount of time to get ready to go anywhere anymore. They used to be ready to go within 20 minutes of a disaster call, but now they were woefully out of practice.

There was no way that Bella could continue working after the tsunami, so she had gone full tilt into building up her training program. She became so well known that trainers and their dogs came from hundreds of miles away just to work with her. And best of all she still had time for Edward and to travel with him when he was needed. He only took the assignments that really spoke to him; the fires in Texas, the tornadoes that swept across the mid-west and the mudslides that buried parts of Asia, those were the places he went. But he always made sure that his girl was with him.

"I'm coming! He won't freaking hold still!" Edward called down and she could hear the frustration in his voice. She looked down at her daughter's sweet little face. Her hair was a mixture of Edward's wild bronze and her deep brown but her bright green eyes were all Edward.

"Shall we go help those useless boys?" She whispered and Elle smiled up at her. She shifted her to her shoulder and walked up the steps quietly, listening to Edward's conversation with the boys.

"Jake, if you just wait a second then you can play with him. But getting in the way is only making everything take longer." He sighed and she heard the dog chuff his annoyance at the delay. Peeking around the doorway, her heart fluttered as it always did when she saw her boys together. Jake was sitting on the floor as close to the changing table as he could get with his wheelchair. His recovery had been long and grueling. His spine had been crushed when the tunnel collapsed around him and his back end was useless. The Vet had suggested euthanizing him, but that was just not an option. As long as he wasn't in pain, she demanded that they do everything possible to try and save him. Four long months later, they got him settled in his first wheelchair and he never looked back. He would never work again but that was alright with everyone.

Bella shifted her eyes to the squirming mess of arms and legs on the table and stifled a giggle. Edward was trying to get Ethan into a simple t-shirt and jeans, but the baby was making it difficult.

When they had returned from the Philippines with Jake's condition still so touch and go, she had put aside getting to the doctor to monitor her pregnancy. It wasn't until Rose went into labor three weeks early that she realized how important it was to get checked out. Edward held her hand tightly as the doctor had weighed and measured her and then kissed away her tears when she had sent them for an ultrasound without any further explanation. Bella feared the worst as the technician moved the wand over her belly and she had held her breath when she turned to them.

"Well, it looks like your doctor was right to be suspicious of your weight and measurements. You're having twins."

Looking back now, their fear and trepidation was unfounded. Although neither of them had much experience with babies, they got lots of practice with Rose and Emmett's little one before the twins arrived.

Two months after they returned, Emmett and Rose welcomed their little girl Annie into their lives. They both had been seeing a therapist to try and deal with the linger holes in Emmett's memory and Rose's self-deprecating behavior. While they would never have what they had before the tsunami, they were able to do what few couples could, fall in love all over again.

They were late for a barbeque at Rose and Emmett's right now and it looked like Bella was going to have to step in and help get Ethan dressed if they were ever going to make it out of the house.

"All right my boys…how about if Daddy holds the girl child while Momma finishes getting you dressed?" Bella suggested and Edward looked up at her with a shy smile.

"I really thought I could do it this time. He is just so damn wiggly." He sighed as he took Elle from her arms and watched as she got Ethan ready in just a few seconds. Jake glanced at Edward with a look that said 'see…now was that so hard.' Edward just ignored the dog and took his girl down to get her coat on.

Their relationship had changed the instant Jake had pushed him out of that tunnel. When Edward was able to help free him from his prison of rocks and watched him adjust to his new life they both stopped competing for Bella's affection and instead worked together to protect both her and the babies. Although Jake still occasionally acted all 'she was mine first' when it came to bed time and Edward tried to move the dog out of his spot and to the end of the bed, he just brushed him off. He loved the dog…with his whole heart.

It took some maneuvering to get everyone loaded in the car, but Jake refused to sit in the back with his wheelchair, which meant that Edward had to take him out and load him in the backseat between the babies and then put the bulky wheelchair in the cargo space. Bella sat with a bowl of roasted pumpkin pasta salad on her lap and turned around to watch Jake as he settled down on the seat. Sometimes just looking at him hurt. He had sacrificed himself for Edward and it was only pure luck that the tunnel held just long enough for them to get him out. She loved watching him with the babies. He was so gentle and loving. And protective…forget about it. He didn't let anyone come near them when they were out. A selfish part of her hoped that he went to doggie heaven before they were old enough to understand, because she would never want her children to feel the aching pain of losing a beloved pet.

As if he was reading her mind, the big dog raised his head and met her eyes. He cocked his head to the side and gave her his patented doggie smile before leaning forward and licking her across the face. She pushed him away with a giggle and Edward got in and looked between the two, trying to figure out what just happened.

"You are so weird." He chuckled as he pulled out of the driveway and started the two mile drive to Rose and Emmett's house. His parents were there as well and they were looking forward to spending some time together.

"You know you love us." She sighed as she leaned over and wrapped her arms around his chest. He bent over and kissed the top of her head before he glanced in the rearview mirror at the rest of his family.

How he had ever gotten past the skeletons in his closet was a miracle. But he knew it had everything to do with the woman sitting next to him.

*()*()*

"Rosie! Did you want these sodas in the fridge or the cooler outside?" Emmett asked as he balanced their daughter Annie in one hand and the case of Coke in the other. His little wiggle worm was not helping things as she reached for the brightly colored box.

"In the cooler outside so it is easier for everyone to get to." She called, her voice muffled and distorted as she sat hunched over the toilet. Damn…she had forgotten how much morning sickness sucked.

"Oh baby…do you want some toast?" Emmett cooed as he leaned against the open doorway. He had put Annie in her highchair with some blocks so they had a few minutes before she got bored.

"No…no food. I just need to wait it out." She sighed as she sat back on the floor. He handed her a bottle of water and a Listerine strip, which she kept by the sink for just this reason. If she tried to brush her teeth right now, she would just end up puking again. She felt like shit.

"I hate this." Emmett huffed as he reached down and picked her up, walking with her into the bedroom. He sat her down gently on the bed and then knelt down in front of her. He picked up the hem of her shirt and put his lips against her still flat belly.

"You settle down in there. Momma needs to be able to eat so you can be my big strong quarterback." Emmett whispered and Rose ran her hands through his hair. It still didn't seem real. Even after having him back with her for the last year there were still nights she would wake up screaming for him, her hands searching the other side of the bed for his warmth. But he was always there…always ready to pull her into his arms and soothe her.

"You are such an amazing father." She breathed and he looked up at her with that dimpled grin she loved so much. She cradled his face between her palms and bent down for a kiss. His tongue tasted like perfection as he tilted his head to get better access to her mouth. His fingers found her nipples with unnerving accuracy and they would have been naked in seconds if not for the loud cry from the other room.

They broke away, both panting and smiling widely, the promise of a continuation later unnecessary. He pulled her to her feet and wrapped his arm around her shoulder as they walked out to get their little cockblocker. Company was coming anyway…and the wait only made things better.

*()*()*

"I can't believe Rose is pregnant again. They thought it would be so hard for her but…bam! I'm just so happy for them." Bella said as she slipped her shoes off and sat down at her vanity to pull the pins from her hair. They had gotten Jake and the babies all settled in after the exciting afternoon and Bella had no doubt they would sleep straight through the night.

Edward stepped up behind her and helped fish out the pins that were holding her hair up. His fingers rubbed at her scalp and she leaned back against him with a groan.

"I _love_ when you do that." She sighed and he ran his hands down her throat and cupped her breasts.

"I think I know something else you love." He whispered in her ear as he pinched and pulled at her nipples. She rose from the chair and pushed him backwards, taking some satisfaction at the stunned look on his face. She giggled as she pushed her dress off her shoulders and it fluttered to the floor, leaving her in just a pale pink bra and panty set. She put her knee on the edge of the bed and started tugging at his jeans. He took the opportunity to pull his shirt off and then he watched as she straddled him. It didn't matter how many times they were together, every time felt like the first.

Her hands trailed up over his thighs, stopping to give his balls a gentle squeeze that had him panting before she took him in her hand. He arched up off the bed as she slid her hand up and down, leaning forward to lap at the bead of moisture at the tip of his shaft. He sat up before he came in her hand and pushed the straps of her bra down, feasting on the hard little points of her breasts. She let go of his cock to grab at his hair, needing some way to ground herself before she just floated away. He tugged her up so his cock was rubbing against the silk of her panties and she rocked her hips against him. He rolled her over, loving her carefree giggle as he settled her on her back. He yanked at her panties and then settled back between her spread thighs. She glistened so delectably for him and he had to have a taste.

Bella rode his face as he used first one and then two fingers inside of her. Her hands pulled at his hair but it only spurred him on. Her eyes fluttered closed as he suckled her, drawing out her orgasm to the point of insanity and only then did he move up her body and settle inside of her.

Her name carried on a puff of air drifting out of his mouth as he pushed inside of her. It was good…it was always so fucking good, he thought as she wrapped her arms and legs around him and rocked in time with his thrusts. He wasn't going to last long.

Bella looked up into Edward's intense stare and felt her eyes sting with tears. She never imagined that she would ever have all of this…this overwhelming happiness. She was loved and needed and treated with so much kindness…and she deserved everything she got. And as she held her husband while he found his release inside her, she thanked God that she had finally been rescued.

**So...that is the end...I know you wanted more of Emmett and Rose but I just couldn't find them...maybe an outtake one of these days...who knows.**

**I can't thank you enough for hanging in with this story...through the ups and downs...the disasters and cliffies...and the threat of killing poor Jake.**

**I love this story...more than any of my drabbles that get all the attention/reviews...and those of you who joined me on this ride...you have my undying love.**

**See you next time...**

**K**


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